


Ghost Games

by LeonoraChris



Series: Ghosts [2]
Category: NCIS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Baltimore, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mystery, Pre-Series, detective tony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-26
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-01-17 01:49:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 61,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1369447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeonoraChris/pseuds/LeonoraChris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was used to hiding himself. Ghost games, that's what he had started calling it as a kid. He had been hiding too many secrets and was unwilling to share the burden with anyone. Then a case in Baltimore brought new people in his life. Soon he found himself questioning everything. Was it finally time to stop playing games?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Friends?

**Author's Note:**

>   
>  _The story and any possible original characters are mine.  
>  NCIS, its own characters and canon aren't._

The engine was roaring, the radio was on and he was singing along with it. Frank Sinatra. Can't go wrong with that. Changing gears, he almost closed his eyes, just enjoying the speed. Only a moment later he was thanking whoever was watching over him, for not letting him close his eyes. He barely even had time to hear another car coming from somewhere behind him. Not to mention seeing it. Driving faster than a race car the vehicle went around and then past him, nearly pushing him off the road, and disappeared from his sight soon after.

Letting the car horn show just how pissed off he was, he cursed the fact that he didn't even have a chance to see the plate. However if he'd ever see that car again, the driver was going to have a little chat with one Anthony DiNozzo Junior... Throwing out few profanities, which would have made even his father blush, he let out a deep sigh. If nothing else, he was thankful that he wasn't a passenger in the other car. Hell would freeze over before that would happen.

* * *

"Jethro! Slow down! You almost got that other driver killed!" Donald Mallard—Ducky to his friends—glared at his old friend, NCIS Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

"Seemed to be doing just fine to me."

Ducky tutted. "And your poor agents. They do not seem to be doing _just fine_ at all."

Glancing at their unlucky backseat passengers, Gibbs was amused and he grinned. His newest Agent, Vivian Blackadder, was looking positively green. His older Agent, Brent Langer who had been part of his team for a few impressive weeks, he was looking just as green, but at least he wasn't holding on to the car seats for his dear life the way Vivian did.

"Jethro, I understand that we are in a hurry, but if we crash, we are not going to make it there anyway."

"You ever seen me crash, Duck?"

"Plenty."

"When there's other people in the car with me?"

"Jethro..."

After few long seconds, Gibbs finally dropped the speed. It was nowhere near enough by normal standards, but for Gibbs it was slow enough. He heard two collective sighs of relief coming from the backseats.

By the time they made it to their destination, the younger agents scrambled outside the car, not getting outside as fast as they would have liked. Once they did, they rushed to the trash cans farther away to throw up. Or Vivian did and Langer kept her hair out of the way, while trying to keep himself from adding his share in the bin. The battle was finally lost at the thought of going through a car ride like that again when they had to return home. It would take a good while before they would join their boss and even then it was on shaking legs.

Ducky seemed completely unfazed by the car drive, but that didn't stop him from frowning and shaking his head at Gibbs' amused half smirk. There was evil and then there was Gibbs; stubborn old mule, who would play nice only when it suited him. "No wonder you cannot keep any of your agents working with you for more than a few weeks at most. Do you have to make it harder for them to stay?"

"Don't need people who can't even follow my rules." Gibbs shrugged and walked away before he had to hear more of Ducky's lectures. He wasn't fast enough.

"Rules that _you_ forget when it suits you, Jethro."

"Ducky..."

They walked closer to the flashing lights, coming from the two police cars, and crowd of curious onlookers with their cameras out.

"Take those cameras from them!" one of the detectives was yelling at someone, with colorful profanities thrown in the mix.

Stepping to the crime scene, the agents and Ducky were stopped from moving forward by that same Detective. "This is a crime scene! Back off or I _will_ have you arrested! It'll be a tight fit, with you all in one holding cell, but I'm sure you'll love it!"

Taking out his badge, Gibbs showed it to the man. "NCIS. I believe the victim is a Marine, which makes this our case."

"Try again. What is NCIS?" Before they could answer, the Detective was screaming again at someone, "No smoking at the crime scene, you bonehead!"

Gibbs was not looking happy and just as he was about to open his mouth again, another voice spoke, a young man, full of mischief and youth, "It stands for Naval Criminal Investigative Service. They're Navy cops, boss." He had his Detective badge clipped on his belt.

"DiNozzo..." the older man growled.

Gibbs, his agents and Ducky watched as the very young looking Detective talked to the older one, the man who they had thought was one of the detectives, but seemed to be the head of the Baltimore PD instead. The kid looked way too young to be a Detective. How old was he anyway? In his early twenties? The man looked like he should be in college, playing sports with his friends and having the time of his life, instead of doing this kind of job that could eat up the time to even have a life.

Turning around to look at the small group of people who were standing there awkwardly, the kid smirked with odd gleam in his eyes. "Which one of you was driving the car?"

"I did," Gibbs answered with a questioning eyebrow.

"Thought so." The young Detective held out his hand, which Gibbs took in his. "Anthony DiNozzo. Detective. Just call me Tony."

"NCIS. Leroy Jethro Gibbs. Just Gibbs."

"Ah..." Tony grinned and then went to greet the other three.

"Donald Mallard, but call me Ducky. I am the medical examiner."

"Vivian Blackadder."

"Brent Langer."

"Hey!" Gibbs barked, getting the attention, for a moment anyway. "What is this?" He held out the piece of paper, which Tony had slipped in his hand while they shook hands.

Tony chuckled. "That. Is your speeding ticket, Agent Gibbs. Next time don't try to kill a cop on the road."

"Oh my... It was you? You didn't get hurt, did you?" Ducky sounded worrying, but not for Gibbs getting any trouble though.

Tony stared and then flashed his movie star smile, although there was odd flash of danger in his eyes. "Nope, but was a little too close that I did."

"I apologize, dear boy..."

"Oh, it's not _your_ apology I need to hear."

"The boss never apologizes so you'll die waiting." Vivian snorted and then flinched when Langer elbowed her.

"Why am I not surprised..." Tony muttered. He noticed how Gibbs put the paper in his pocket with a dark look on his face. _  
_

"DiNozzo!" That was his own boss again, looking beyond miffed. "Explain to me why did you call these people here?"

Tony smiled, but this time his smile looked chilly and he moved closer to whisper, "Call it a little payback for what you did to my partner. You know he did nothing wrong—everyone knows it—and yet you fired him."

"I could get you in big trouble for this, DiNozzo," the man threatened with a snarl.

Tony smiled again that chilly little smile that made your skin crawl. Turning around to face the crime scene again, his face was sunny again. Only then did the boss notice that the agents had used the chance and got into work. "See you next week, boss. When my little break is over."

"This won't end here, DiNozzo. You know that."

"Yeah, yeah. Have fun with the NCIS!" Tony cheered and walked away, ignoring someone calling his name. As much as the crime scene was calling for him, what his body needed however, was rest. Eternity if possible.

"Anthony! Good grief... I am terribly out of shape..." Ducky gasped for breath when he made it to the car, just as Tony was opening the door.

"Doctor Mallard? Can I help you with something?" Tony looked cautious.

"Ducky, young man."

"Right..."

Digging something out of his pocket, Ducky gave it to Tony. Pain killers. "I believe you need these."

Tony stared, completely in shock and awe at the same time, thinking he had hid it perfectly for anyone unaware of his situation to notice. "How did you..?"

"I have good eyes for such things, young man. The way you move around, to name a few, but I'm sure I am only one of the few people who would notice it. I do hope we did not cause that."

Lifting up his shirt, Tony revealed his bandaged torso, gingerly touching the middle of it with his fingers. "Nope. Don't worry about it."

Ducky looked relieved, but then he studied the bandaged area with slightly narrowed eyes, as if he was trying to see the wound. "May I ask what caused it then?" It sounded more like a demand, rather than a question.

Pulling the shirt back down, Tony studied the small bottle he was given. He was happy to notice it was one of the few meds he was willing to take. Dry swallowing few, he tried giving the bottle back to Ducky.

"No. Keep it. I have another one with me. I always have one or two with me, just in case. For emergencies," Ducky added, seeing the bemused look.

"Well, thank you for... these. As for the wound... Well, you know. Just another day at work. Looks worse than it is, really."

Ducky tutted. "You must be as bad as Jethro."

Taking out his business card, Tony handed it to the old man. "If you need some help that I could offer. Just don't show it to other people. I like my privacy."

"I will keep that in mind, Anthony." Ducky smiled gently as put the card away.

Saying goodbye, they both went on their way, not knowing just how soon they would meet again.

"Finished making friends with him?" Gibbs muttered irritably as soon as Ducky returned to the crime scene where he had abandoned his work for that moment.

"Jethro. He is a nice young man."

"A nice young man who wrote me a ticket."

"And we all know it's nowhere near what you deserve, Jethro."

Shrugging, Gibbs pointed to the body. "Ready to get back to work now?"

Looking toward where he had last seen the young Detective, Gibbs hoped they would never meet again. That overly bright smile and the kid's whole appearance was screaming trouble, which he did not want to deal with if he had to work with the person. Sadly though, his current agents weren't from the brightest side either...

Throwing one last glare toward the 'boss' and the people with him, Gibbs was pleased to notice that they were finally left alone. Then it turned out to be not such a good deal after all since as soon as they left, so did all the cops keeping the crowds from doing what they pleased. It had to be a little payback from the bastard... Only after Gibbs threatened to shoot anyone stepping on the crime scene and once the last cameras had been taken away, they got the much needed space to do their work.

Cursing the city of Baltimore, and his own boss for sending him there, Gibbs put his agents to work, yelling his orders when they didn't seem to be able to think for themselves.

"Jethro. I believe we have a problem..."

"What?" They _didn't need_ any more problems.

"We need to move the body before the storm hits."

Looking up at the sky, Gibbs only now noticed how dark it had suddenly become. They were in a hurry or the evidence on the crime scene would be soon gone.


	2. Let's Pretend We Don't Know Each Other

They could smell the rain in the air before it hit them, which meant their time was running out.

"Ducky?" Gibbs spoke as the man finished his phone call.

"Bad news I am afraid. The car broke down so Gerald won't be able to make it here on time."

"Just what we need," Gibbs muttered, wondering just what else could go wrong on that already bad day. "I guess I have to start making calls." Turning around to face his two agents, Gibbs was yelling at them again, "Don't just stand there! Secure the body!"

"Jethro, wait. Do not call anyone yet. I might be able to arrange some help."

"You, Ducky?"

"Why, do you think I couldn't have any special friends able to help us?"

"That's not what I meant..."

"It's alright, Jethro. We are all a little worried right now."

"Who are you going to call?"

"A young friend of mine." Ducky smiled and took out a business card from his pocket. Dialing the number, he waited. He was pretty sure Anthony would not be happy about this, but he also had a feeling their need for help would not be turned down.

_"Yes?"_ sleepy voice answered.

"Anthony. Were you sleeping? I am truly sorry for waking you."

Gibbs looked up sharply from the body he'd been staring at. Anthony? Not _that_ Anthony, right? They had met the Detective once and only briefly at the crime scene.

_"Ducky? Is everything alright?"_ The voice was suddenly more alert.

"Yes and no. However, we do need some help."

_"Tell me."_

* * *

They watched as the body was being loaded in the big car and then took off with it. Seeing the look on Gibbs' face, Tony grinned. "Don't worry. I know the people and I know where he's being taken. No one will touch him until Ducky has his hands on him first. Well, other than the touching that's needed to move the body from the car of course."

Gibbs glared. He didn't trust the happy and bright facade the kid put on. The moment he had seen the familiar car stopping at the crime scene, with the other car following it, and he saw the young Detective stepping out, he had given Ducky his 'look'.

_"Explain,"_ Gibbs had growled.

_"Not now, Jethro,"_ was all Ducky said. No amount of glaring or growling gave any answers.

Staring at the far too friendly and familiar chatter between his old friend and this new kid, Gibbs felt even more suspicious. Something wasn't being told to him, and whether it was his business or not, he didn't like it. He didn't like not knowing something.

"I apologize, Anthony. You must have been sleeping when I called you and right now you look like you need all the rest you can get."

"It's okay." Tony shrugged. He was wearing a pair of oversized pants, T-shirt and sneakers without any socks on. He had obviously left his home in a hurry. "Do you need a place to stay?"

"We'll go to a hotel," Gibbs grumbled.

"Actually, no. You can't go to a hotel. It's all been booked. I bet even the shadiest places."

"What? Is there some special event we're unaware of?"

"Special event indeed." Tony grinned and pointed at the bigger than life poster on a nearby wall, which stated some big name celebrity was going to be there. Not that the name or even the face was something Gibbs would recognize. The unimpressed look on his face told as much.

"If you young people don't mind sleeping on the couch..." Tony spoke, looking at the two younger agents, who were both older than he was. "...then I'm sure we could all somehow fit in my apartment for one night."

Gibbs almost said no, but then he saw the exhausted looks his agents were giving him and he knew both he and Ducky were also going to need some sleep. Especially when their last case had been barely closed when they got the call and order to go to Baltimore. Besides, he wanted to find out what this thing between Ducky and DiNozzo kid was. "Fine."

"Really?" Tony looked surprised. Shocked even, as if he had been positive his suggestion would not be accepted.

"Really."

As they were walking to their cars, Tony suddenly took hold of Ducky's arm. "Want to ride in my car? Surely you could take a break from sitting in the same car with a madman."

Ducky smiled. "Certainly. It would be my pleasure, Anthony."

Vivian and Langer looked at Tony, silently pleading with their eyes. Although they didn't see themselves becoming friends with this stranger, they still would much rather drive with him than with Gibbs. There was no way it could be worse than driving with their boss. Their unsaid pleads were not seen nor heard, or perhaps it was being ignored, and so they slowly went to their car, mentally preparing themselves for another round of hell on wheels.

Somewhere far away was heard low thundering sound, just as the first drops of water came down.

* * *

Shockingly, the car drive turned out to be rather uneventful for all of them and even the two younger agents were able to keep their remaining insides... inside.

They barely made it out of their cars when the rain hit them and it came down hard; pouring like someone had cut a hole in the dark clouds right above them and they were all soaking wet in a matter of seconds. Together, they ran toward the apartment block, with Tony leading the way. Greeting the elderly neighbor of his, Tony went to open his door. He didn't bother waiting to see if they closed the door, which they did, and went to get them towels. Bringing them, he also had with him some clothes to borrow.

"You can take turns in the shower if you want to. I'll go make some coffee and tea. Unfortunately I don't have any food in here."

Before anyone had a chance to do anything, Vivian rushed in the bathroom. The men opted simply to dry off themselves and change the clothes.

While Gibbs and Langer were left to sit in the living room to watch the news on TV, Gibbs noticed how Ducky followed Tony in the kitchen. Since Langer was too engrossed watching the TV, Gibbs stood up and silently made his way toward the kitchen. Walking past the bathroom door, he could hear the shower was still running. To his surprise the kitchen door was closed. He heard some faint talking and it annoyed him that there had to be a door. Hoping that the door wouldn't make any noise, Gibbs slowly opened it, just enough so he could hear what was being said. To his embarrassment he felt like a kid again, trying to eavesdrop his parents talking.

"I really don't want to talk about it," Tony spoke, while making the coffee. He frowned when Ducky advised him how to make it, so that certain someone would like it and remain happy. "Are you sure?" He frowned even more. Seeing the nod, he did as he was told, with a visible shudder. Once he was done, he turned to face the old doctor again. "Like I said, I don't want to talk about it. It's all in the past now and I would like to keep it that way."

"Keeping things like that to yourself will one day become too heavy burden to carry on your own. Perhaps it already is."

"Like it matters." Tony snorted.

Ducky sighed heavily. "Anthony..."

"Can't we just keep pretending that we don't know each other? It's been working just fine so far. Why the sudden change? Be honest with me."

Ducky remembered the look Jethro had given to him before and the way the former Marine had kept looking at the two of them. "Jethro knows something is going on. You can trust him. He would not betray your trust. He may seem like a bastard most of the time, but deep down he is a big teddybear, as his girl used to call him."

"I don't care. Promise me... When we walk back in there, you and I will go back to the _we just met_ act. Okay?"

With a deep and heavy sigh, Ducky nodded. "I promise... But I do not like this."

After that there was silence in the kitchen between the two men, so Gibbs returned in the living room, barely remembering to close the door before leaving.

Sitting back on the couch, Gibbs saw that Langer was still watching the TV. His own eyes were also watching it, but his mind was at the conversation he had heard. He probably had no business knowing this big secret of theirs, but since they would be spending the night here, there was no way he would not think about it. After a while, Gibbs cursed in his mind. Shannon would head slap him if she would see him right now, unable to let go of something that was none of his business.

One hour later they were all sitting in the living room. Ducky was sharing one of his many stories with them, while they were drinking their tea and Gibbs his coffee, which no one else was willing to go anywhere near; the fumes were bad enough. Shockingly, the man was currently drinking his last cup of coffee, having finished the whole pot on his own.

Feeling the constant stare, Tony finally looked at the old Agent. He furrowed his brows when Gibbs simply kept staring at him without blinking or saying anything. During the next few minutes, Tony kept glancing back toward Gibbs and he was always seeing the same; Gibbs was staring at him, almost like trying to read his mind.

"So, how old are you?" Vivian suddenly asked.

Tony blinked, completely thrown off by the random question out of nowhere. "Twenty-six later this year."

"Hah! I knew it! He's the baby among us!" Vivian cheered. She held out her hand and, much to everyone else's displeasure, Langer sighed and gave her money from his wallet.

"Baby? You had a bet? About me?" Tony asked with his eyebrows up. Rubbing his chin, he was looking suddenly tired. "I think I'll go make sure each of us has a place to sleep. The _lady_ can have my bed. Don't worry, I don't usually hit on _older women_." He winked and walked away, leaving furiously blushing Vivian staring after him. Anger or embarrassment, no one knew. Perhaps both.

"What was that all about?" Gibbs was seething and his agents looked at him, startled, as if they had forgotten their boss was sitting right there with them.

"Boss..."

"Just a bet..."

"You repeat something like this and you will be going back home. I don't care how. This will not happen again. Understood?"

"Yes, boss..."

"Yes, Gibbs..."

Sharing looks with Ducky, Gibbs stood up, to go and see if the kid was alright. He didn't get far when Tony came back, carrying blankets and pillows with him.

"One of you can sleep on the couch and I've got two beds in the guest room. I know they're not too big, but I doubt any of you want to share the big bed and then end up cuddling in sleep, right?" He was chuckling at the mental image he had in his head.

Gibbs stared again. The kid didn't seem upset. Was his gut failing him now? "And where will you be sleeping?"

"Oh, I have my own special place. Just for me. Don't worry about it." Showing Vivian where his bedroom was and to the men the guest room, Tony disappeared somewhere.

"I'll take the couch," Gibbs said and Langer looked relieved, not wanting to share a room with his boss. Especially now when the man was obviously still mad at him and Vivian.

Thanks to the long day, and the other sleepless nights they all had before, they were soon in deep sleep. All but one person who kept staring at the darkness above him. The clock was ticking on the living room wall. _Too loud_ , Gibbs thought. And maybe he should not have become so greedy with the coffee... After a while he finally stood up, to get something to drink from the kitchen. When he opened the fridge, he was surprised to find it empty. Water it was then... After drinking, he went back to the couch, feeling suddenly sleepy enough to fall asleep. His last though was, where on earth had DiNozzo gone to sleep?

Gibbs didn't get much sleep. At 4 AM, he was more or less awake again and with his natural needs calling to be fulfilled, he went to the bathroom. While doing his business, he noticed that the shower curtains were hiding the bathtub, which he remembered seeing there before. After washing his hands, out of natural curiosity Gibbs pulled away the curtains and then he froze.

In the bathtub, in the middle and under bunch of blankets and pillows, was Tony. He was sleeping, like in some kind of nest.


	3. Night Time Conversation

He felt someone watching him and then something flashed, which was what finally woke him up. Making sure to pretend he was still sleeping, he slowly slipped his hand under his pillow and then faster than the person in the room could react, Tony pointed his weapon at the intruder, trying to look much more awake than what he felt. His hair was sticking up in every possible direction and he was blinking his eyes owlishly as he stared at the man who stood a little too close to him than what he was comfortable with.

"You shoot everyone who have to use the bathroom?" Gibbs asked curiously, holding his hands up with amusement sparkling in his eyes, just to show he wasn't there to murder him in his sleep or anything.

"Agent Gibbs..." Tony let his hand drop on the blankets. Gibbs noticed with interest that he was holding the gun in his left hand; he could've sworn the kid was right-handed. "I was sleeping on my right hand, so it was easier to use the left one," Tony answered Gibbs' unsaid question, surprising the man since it was rare for anyone to be able to know what he was thinking. There were only a select few who got close to it. "I saw you looking at the gun and I put two and two together. Doesn't take a genius."

Gibbs shook his head, amused. "Why are you sleeping in a bathtub, DiNozzo? And is there a specific reason to keep a gun under your pillow?"

Sitting up properly, Tony hid a yawn behind his hand, the one still holding a gun. Still fully loaded. Tired as he was and only wanting to go back to sleep in his warm nest, he flashed the man his Gibbs worthy glare; reserved for the chosen few. He wasn't amused. He was tired, he was in pain and now that he was somewhat awake he was starting to feel nauseous.

_Impressive_... Gibbs mused, but kept his thoughts hidden from the young man. At least he hoped he did.

"I'll let you know, Agent Gibbs, that sleeping in a bathtub is what I do from time to time. It's kind of my thing, so it's nothing new. As for the gun, I always sleep with a weapon or few with me. So if I were you, I would never try to wake me up. You were lucky this time. Last person who woke me up, when he shouldn't have, wasn't."

"You couldn't shoot me that easily, kid," Gibbs stated confidently.

"Might want to check that again someday..." Tony mumbled, to himself mostly. Then suddenly he noticed what Gibbs was holding. His eyes widened for a split second, before he slipped his mask back on. "Is that a camera? Did you take a picture of me? You know that's creepy."

"Figured I'll take a little memento of our little stay in here. Might end up in my scrapbook."

"Right." Tony rolled his eyes when the man stared at him. The question was there, but never asked out loud. "You obviously don't do scrapbooks, Agent Gibbs."

"Ah. You got me," Gibbs agreed calmly. He made sure that the camera was not too close to the kid's hands. Wouldn't know what he'd do with it.

"Well, that's just so _perfect_. I mean, I know camera loves me and all. I will _burst_ with happiness. Unless you're some creep. I've had enough of stalkers and crazy people in my life for a while."

Gibbs raised his eyebrow at the casual way Tony mentioned those creeps and stalkers, as if it was an everyday thing for him, or at least normal enough occurrence to mention it casually in a conversation.

"As lovely as it has been talking to you in the middle of the night, I really need my beauty sleep right now. So if you'd be so kind... Leave."

Bastard as he was, Gibbs put the camera away in a safe place and instead of leaving, he stepped closer and sat on the edge of the bathtub. "How do you know Ducky?"

Tony stared and although he was startled, he managed to keep his mask firmly in place and faked innocence, which normally would have fooled Gibbs. "Sorry?"

"I heard you two talking. In the kitchen."

Fighting against the natural reaction of showing just how startled and nervous that had made him, Tony instead looked genuinely baffled, which again, would normally fool even Gibbs. "Talking about what? Oh! You mean when he went on and on about some legend or history of that favorite tea of his. Or maybe it was some urban myth. He's a walking storybook, that one. Different tale to go with almost anything. Must be fun, having him around."

Gibbs leaned closer. "Stop it. I _know_ you two know each other from before. Why is it such a huge secret? I don't like secrets. Especially when it's about my people. Does this secret of yours endanger Ducky? I swear if that's the case..."

Many people had been intimidated by Gibbs' ' _I take care of my people_ ' mood he was in, but Tony simply stared with barely even blinking. He'd been around way worse people than this old man. He hardly got scared anymore, which made some people call him foolhardy and sometimes even suicidal; pulling off stunts that most of the hardened people he had met, cops and criminals alike, would think several times before even thinking about doing. "Nope. Not a danger to him. And it is none of your business."

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. ' _None of your business_ ' usually in Gibbs' language meant that he _had_ to find out.

Reading the Agent's thoughts rather easily on his face again, Tony rubbed his wounded chest area. He actually regretted sleeping in the bathtub this time. "Look... I can't tell anything. Because as much as I don't know or even like you, I don't want you to think any less of me. I don't want anyone to think any less of me than they already might. And also because it's one of the moments in my past that are far too painful to even think about. It's private. Off limits. I'm sure even you have such memories you refuse to talk about, Agent Gibbs."

Gibbs flinched before he could control himself and for a moment he had the vision of his two girls in his mind, smiling at him. Seeing the knowing look in the kid's eyes, Gibbs was startled and wondered what he knew... He suddenly had the urge to ask, "What do you see?"

Tony hesitated before answering, "I see a man who is holding a painful burden on his shoulders. Old memories, past and future. You worry about those you care about."

Gibbs was starting to become intrigued. "You're just a kid. How come you're a Detective?"

Tony muttered something from under his breath and lay back down in his nest and pulled the covers over him. "Turn the lights off when you leave. Good _night_."

Gibbs chuckled silently, before he did what he was told to do for a change. As he was about to leave the bathroom, he heard Tony speaking again, with a silent threat in the tone of his sleepy voice.

"There are no clues about anything you want to know in my apartment, Agent Gibbs. I don't keep anything truly important or sentimental in here. Learned that lesson the hard way. If you wake me up again before morning, I'll unleash Ducky on you."

Gibbs was going to comment something sarcastic, but the soft snoring told him that the man had fallen asleep, or was faking it. Shaking his head, Gibbs walked back in the living room and for the rest of the night he was simply either sitting or lying on the couch, awake and thinking, and wishing he had his basement so he would at least have something to do.

Outside it was still raining hard and the rain kept battering the windows. By morning there would be hardly even a memory of the bad weather.

* * *

Smelling the breakfast, Ducky wandered slowly toward it. The younger agents were still asleep, so that had to be either Jethro or Anthony in there. Or both. Suddenly worried, Ducky hurried in the kitchen, immediately sensing the heavy atmosphere between the two men.

Tony had magically made some breakfast appear from somewhere. He stubbornly kept his back toward Gibbs who wasn't reading the newspaper he was holding, but was calmly sipping his coffee and keeping his eyes on the young man. "Ducky. Good morning," Tony spoke before he even turned around. When he did, there was a flash of relief on his face before it was gone. Smiling at his old friend, he pointed to the kitchen chairs. "Sit down. The breakfast is almost ready."

"Anthony?"

Tony made a face. "He knows, Ducky. I mean he doesn't actually _know_ , but he heard us talking yesterday."

"Is that so." Ducky turned his head to look at Gibbs, frowning and showing his friend just how much he disapproved that.

Gibbs shrugged and stood up. "I'll go make a few phone calls."

Once Gibbs was gone from the kitchen, Ducky looked at Tony with honest worry on his face.

"I don't need to hear it, Ducky. It's none of his business."

Ducky was silent for a while, pondering his words. "Perhaps he would like to know."

"Oh, right. Like the last time when he nearly shot me. Sure. I'll go and tell him; hey, Gibbs. Do you remember me? I'm the one who—"

"Anthony. He was drunk. He was not thinking and he was full of anger and sorrow. I do not believe he meant any of those things."

"Can you honestly say he didn't mean it all?"

Ducky had no idea what to say to that.

"My point exactly."

"Why did you call him here then?"

"I didn't know he'd be the one they would send."

"Anthony..."

"I wanted to see how he's doing. Was worried he might recognize me, so I didn't want to be at his home field if that would happen. Guess that's one less thing to worry about now then."

Ducky smiled sadly and accepted the offered piece of frittata.

"Don't look so sad, Ducky. At least we don't have to pretend anymore that you and I don't know each other."

* * *

"Yes. You too." Gibbs finished his phone call with a suffering sigh. Women... They made life so complicated. Glancing toward the kitchen door, he dialed another number.

"I need to have few strings pulled. Could use some help here... No, not another Agent... Anthony DiNozzo, Detective who works here... _Those two_ wouldn't know the difference between a dead victim and one who is still alive. I'm sure you remember what happened couple of days ago? The whole building must know by now... I'm still their boss and I'm saying they would be much more useful working behind the desk... I don't care what you think. I'm sending them back, do what you will. I'm done." Ending the call, Gibbs walked back in the kitchen, hoping that things would work out.


	4. Evade And Attack

As his surprise guests were finally leaving, Tony couldn't shake off the feeling that their boss was up to something, if the almost smug look on the man's face was anything he could go by.

"Thank you, Anthony. For everything," Ducky said softly. He was still in the apartment, while the others had left without saying anything. It seemed he had to try to smooth things and at least be the one to thank his young friend.

Tony shrugged, with his arms carefully crossed over his chest and trying to not let Ducky see just how bad his mood was. During the morning he'd been avoiding spending time alone with Gibbs. He trusted Ducky to not say anything without his permission, but he most certainly didn't trust Gibbs. In every conversation or not, Gibbs kept trying to sneak out some answers or even hints from either him or Ducky. Like a sly fox, Gibbs did it in the most subtle ways you could imagine.

"I will not say anything without your agreement, Anthony," Ducky promised and that made Tony smile a little. Not much, but it was there and completely different from the megawatt smiles he usually had on his face. This one was bordering with almost a shy look.

"I know you won't say anything, Ducky. It's _him_ I'm worried about."

"Oh, worry not, my boy. This old man has a trick or few of his own, which even Jethro cannot win over," Ducky said and there was twinkle in his eyes. Tony relaxed immediately.

"I feel sorry for him already."

"You must be the only person to enjoy it."

Tony grinned. "That's because I actually do enjoy listening to you talk, Ducky. Most of the time anyway."

Ducky smiled and gently touched Tony's arm. "I hope you will call me more often, Anthony. At least you should have given me your new phone number before I had to come here myself. Maybe even come visit me once in a while. I could arrange you a special tour at the Navy Yard."

Tony's posture was rigid once more. "I won't be stepping inside that building. The name change doesn't matter, they're still the same. It's their fault that... I'll never forgive him. Why is that he never had to pay the price?"

Ducky was surprised to see such deep anger, even after all these years. It was like the wound was still fresh and painful. It worried him.

"Save your breath, Ducky. I know what you're thinking and I don't want to hear it. I don't care what excuses he gave. The truth is that people got killed because of him."

Ducky smiled sadly. "Is that why you won't settle down? Just because something like that happened, does not mean it's going to happen to you now. You need something more than just your work and all those women you do not even plan to see for longer than a week. You need stability and safety in your life. You need a family. Take it from an old man full of regrets and lost moments."

Tony's eyes flashed with deep anger and hurt. "Well, I don't exactly have a good history with families. Family either hurts you or they die on you."

"Anthony..." Ducky reached out his hand again, but Tony took a step back. He had a pained look on his face.

"I'll call you."

Ducky sighed. "Alright, but please, take care of yourself."

The moment the old man left, Tony walked to the door and locked it up. Looking around desperately for something to throw, he spotted a glass of water, which one of his guests must have left there. Without even hesitating, he grabbed the glass and threw it against the wall in anger.

Meanwhile, Gibbs was tapping his fingers against the car door impatiently and only stopped when Ducky opened the door to the passenger seat. "Took you long enough. More secret sharing between you two?" he muttered and drove away almost immediately when Ducky closed the door, barely giving the other man time to buckle up on his seat.

"Jethro..."

"I don't trust him. There's something about him that makes my gut work so hard it's giving me mixed signals."

"It's not what you think it is."

"Then what is it?

"Not now, Jethro. We will _not_ talk about it now," Ducky said, glancing to the backseat, where the two agents were eagerly listening and trying to look like they weren't doing it.

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. "But you will tell me?"

"Not unless Anthony thinks he can trust you with the truth."

Gibbs was startled. Sure, he himself didn't trust the kid, but... "What does that mean? We don't even know each other. Do we?"

"Jethro..."

Gibbs glared at the road in front of them and then suddenly stopped next to some bus station.

"What are we doing here?" Vivian asked, while Langer simply rubbed his face, after hitting it against the front seat.

"You two have money?"

The agents shared a confused look. "Yes."

"Good. Then get out."

"What?"

"You are going home."

The two agents looked bemused, unsure if this was some stupid joke.

"Now!"

At the commanding yell, the two of them almost jumped out of the car. Before they had time to recover, the car was gone.

"What just happened? Is he always like this?" Vivian asked from Langer who shrugged.

"Pretty much."

Back in the car, Ducky was giving disapproving glances toward Gibbs.

"Stop it, Duck. You don't talk to me, you don't get to say what I do with my agents."

"Is no one brave enough to put you in your place?"

"You and my wife."

"It is a wonder your marriage has lasted this long, Jethro. When was the last time you slept in the basement?"

"The night before last night."

Ducky tutted, but Gibbs only smiled.

* * *

Nursing his bleeding hand, Tony was careful to not step on the pieces of broken glass on the floor, when he heard his phone ringing. "If it's from work, I swear I'll put a bullet right through Bolton's precious little _handbook_..." Seeing the number, he spent few long seconds thinking whether he should answer it or not. Maybe there was some emergency? When he finally picked up the phone, his tone _might_ have been a little bit sharper than it should have been. "What?"

_"Haul your ass to work."_

"Last I remember, I've been given strict orders to not do any work for a few weeks. Orders from both my _and_ your boss, _boss_."

_"I got a call from this NCIS Director, or whoever it was, and they want you to work with this Agent Gibbs. They agreed to share the credit once the case is solved. Now get to work or else."_

"Or else what? Are you really that desperate to fix your image? The seat under your ass is burning hot, am I right, _Major_? Tell me the truth. Did Frost give you another warning?"

_"I'm warning you, DiNozzo. Just because you're his little favorite, doesn't mean you couldn't end up with no backup when you need it the most."_

"Is that a threat I'm hearing there, Bo?"

_"Get to work._ _You have one hour."_

Tony stared at the phone he was holding. The bastard hung up. Running his hand over his tired face, he looked at the time; it was barely eight in the morning. He'd been planning getting some much needed sleep once his guests had left... Cursing both Bolton and Gibbs, Tony quickly changed his clothes, bandaged his hand and left his apartment. He had few chosen words to say to some people.


	5. The Voices From Our Past

Stepping inside the Baltimore PD, Tony smiled at the few cops there who were welcoming him back. It was no surprise to him when his arrival was not a happy homecoming for the other detectives there. He was used to it though and he wasn't working there to make friends. All he wanted was to do his work and that was it.

"Tony, man! Didn't Frost order you to not return for a while?" a young police officer asked as he stopped next to Tony with the violently struggling criminal he was taking inside with his partner.

"He sure did, but what can I do? I'm a wanted man, Mathias." Tony flashed a smile and the other man shook his head, not one bit amused.

"You know... You don't every day get pierced by some stake from the Middle Ages. Of all things to almost get killed with, you always have to go big." The man glanced at his partner, who was nodding. "Getting tied up on the railway last month. Getting bitten by a snake, in the middle of the city."

"You can't forget when he got buried alive. Twice."

Tony held his hands up in surrender. "I have work to do and some heads need to start rolling, so let's talk later, okay?" He rushed away before he had to listen more of that. Thankfully the office wasn't far.

"Buried alive?"

Tony nearly jumped at the words spoken to him right behind him. Turning around he saw Gibbs following him. From where had _he_ showed up anyway..? "Agent Gibbs. My new friend." He didn't even try hiding the sarcasm in his tone.

"Are you some kind of walking trouble maker?" Gibbs asked, still suspicious of the young Detective.

Tony felt offended. Maker and magnet, there was a big difference between the two. "No. The trouble is the one that follows me."

"The unusual ways of getting into trouble?"

"I don't _always_ end up in some odd situations. I do get shot at too, sometimes. And when I do, I don't normally get hit by the bullet either." Tony didn't mean to make it sound like he was bragging. He wasn't. Really.

Gibbs raised his eyebrows and his mouth twisted into a half-smile, which Tony didn't notice as he was again busy walking toward his boss' office. Stopping in front of the office door, Tony turned around. "You're wasting your time, Agent. I can't help you with this case of yours. It's yours and I want nothing to do with it." _Or you_ , he added in his head only.

"I'll be waiting outside," Gibbs said, completely ignoring what Tony just said and walked away, hiding another secret smile.

Glaring after the man, Tony opened the door and stepped inside the office.

"Ah. DiNozzo. You made it. Good for you," his boss snarled. Come to think of it, the man was pretty much always snarling when speaking to him.

Tony closed the door behind him and then calmly faced the older man. "Let me make something very clear, _boss_..."

Meanwhile, Gibbs was on his way out when he noticed how the people were gathering closer to the office.

"They don't want to miss the show," a young police officer spoke, having seen Gibbs staring at them.

"Show?"

"Tony and Bolton don't really get along. They are pretty much always at each other's throats."

Gibbs snorted. He should have known. "DiNozzo has trouble following orders?"

The man frowned and stared at Gibbs, looking almost offended. "It's not that simple. You see, it's Bolton who—"

The office door was slammed wide open and those closest to it hurried back to work, although, there was no doubt that everyone were doing their best to hear it all. Not that any of it was hard to miss.

"Don't you dare walk away!" Bolton screamed as Tony walked outside, looking almost regal next to the screaming man behind him. "I swear, I'll have your badge!"

Tony stopped and smiled coldly. Turning around, he faced his boss who looked ready to slam his door closed. While Bolton was the livid picture of pure madness, Tony was calm. It was funny how he made that seem much more threatening than the screaming. "Go ahead if you can. I've tried getting rid of it myself few times, but you know how Frost and his little friends are. Just do me a favor and let me be there when you break the news to them."

"DiNozzo! Get back in here!"

Tony pulled out a pair of headphones and put them on. Humming along some tune only he heard, he walked out of the suddenly very quiet room.

Gibbs couldn't hide his amusement as he looked at Bolton who went back to yelling after DiNozzo was gone.

In his car, Tony leaned his head against the car seat and closed his eyes. He was so tired of the constant fights and arguments; like this kind of work wasn't hard enough to live with already. Was Bolton really trying to get him killed? He had barely made it out alive from the last undercover job and now he was supposed to go back to work already. Usually he had no problems with it, since he loved his job, but right now he was still feeling bad enough to admit it to himself. He was barely out of the hospital, and after Frost's threats... Well, he wasn't always sure which one he was more afraid of, the bad guys or Frost the wonderful Police Chief who would lock him up for his own safety if he could. Didn't help that Frost had friends everywhere; the downside of having good friends in high places, with many connections.

Tony didn't hear the knocking against the car window over the music he was listening. It was only after the door was yanked open that he opened his eyes and pulled away the headphones. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"I knocked."

"I was listening to music."

Gibbs held his hands against the car roof and leaned closer, towering over the young Detective. Usually his threatening presence made people at least feel uncomfortable if not terrified, but he couldn't read any of those emotions on DiNozzo's face who right now looked only tired.

"What do you want, Gibbs?"

"I assume you were told to help me with my case."

"As I said—"

"I really could use some help. I already sent my agents back home. It's just me and Ducky now."

Tony stared. "Are you stupid? Sending your agents away... Call them back. I can't help you."

Ignoring the question, Gibbs stopped him from closing the door. Time to 'play dirty'... "DiNozzo. It's just _one_ case. Seems to be simple enough. If you help me with it, the sooner you don't have to deal with it anymore. Surely as a cop you understand the importance of someone watching your six in the field. Right now no one is watching mine."

Tony closed his eyes for a moment. That was unfair... Even more after he just had a second threat today, to not have the backup when he'd need it. Plus he didn't have his partner with him anymore either; the only Detective in Baltimore who hadn't tried to make his life harder for him. "Few days. After that I don't care how you solve the case. With or without me." Tony glared and for a moment he thought he saw Gibbs smile, but then figured he must've been imagining it.

Gibbs pulled away and as he walked to his own car, he didn't stay behind to make sure he would be followed. Somehow he knew in his gut that he could trust the kid's word. Besides, they had already wasted time. Now it was time to get to work. He really hoped this young Detective wasn't someone who had no idea what to do.

* * *

"Why is Anthony here?" Ducky frowned when both men walked in the local morgue and autopsy room, which they were currently borrowing.

"He's working with me on the case," Gibbs answered.

Tony didn't say anything. He walked straight to their victim. With his hands deep in his jacket's pockets, his eyes scanned over the bruising and then the obvious strangling marks on the neck. Unless Ducky found something else, the cause of death was pretty obvious.

"Jethro... He should not be working now. Not when he is still recovering from his wound."

Gibbs looked startled and he glanced toward Tony, who wasn't even looking at them. "Wound?"

"Oh, Jethro..." Ducky tutted.

"I'm fine," Tony finally spoke, looking up from the body. Both Gibbs and Ducky opened their mouths, but Tony shook his head. "Not now. Ducky. Is that what I think it is?" He pointed toward the head and Ducky walked closer.

"I am afraid that I cannot see what you—"

"The head, Ducky."

"Ah."

The two of them started mumbling something and Ducky was moving the victim's head and hair so they could take a better look.

"Mind sharing with me?" Gibbs barked.

"Forgive me, Jethro. Of course. I had not yet taken a closer look, so I failed to notice it sooner. There is a tattoo on the man's head. I have to shave off his hair to get a better look... Might not help with your case, but I'm sure Abigail will love it. I will get to that as soon as Gerald returns."

"You do that. Come on, DiNozzo. We have work to do."

"On it..." Tony mumbled and followed Gibbs, with his hands back in his pockets; he looked like some sulking teenager following his father. Once they were back outside, he put on the mask of professionalism. "Now what?" he asked when they stopped beside their cars.

Gibbs pointed toward his own car. "Get in the car. We'll go to D.C. and find the man's closest family, wife and daughter."

Tony froze and he might have even lost some of the color on his tanned face. "No."

Gibbs turned around. "I said, get in the car."

"No. I have my own car. I can keep up with you just fine."

"You have a problem with my driving, DiNozzo?" Gibbs narrowed his eyes, noticing the too fast and shallow breathing.

"I always drive the car. I'm never the passenger."

"We don't have time for this. Get in the car!"

Tony moved slowly. Too slowly. Opening the car door to the passenger seat, he slowly sat inside. It happened almost immediately; the flashes of images and colors in his head, the screaming, the sudden pain and then darkness. He couldn't do this. Before he got the chance to get out of the car, Gibbs was already driving.

Meanwhile, Gibbs was wondering if this was worth all the trouble. He wasn't known to be a patient man and DiNozzo was already testing it. Speeding away from the building, he suddenly heard a car door open. Looking to the passenger seat, he couldn't believe what he saw. the door was wide open and he couldn't see DiNozzo anywhere. Suddenly terrified by what he would find, Gibbs hit the brakes. Leaving the car on the other side of the street, he jogged toward the figure now lying on the ground farther away.

Tony winced as he rolled over and then slowly stood up, biting his lip and rubbing his chest with a trembling hand. His back wasn't feeling any better, but he couldn't reach there. This might not have been one of his smartest moves...

"DiNozzo!"

Tony waved his hand and started walking away stiffly, and as carefully as he could, while he waited for the pain level to go back to what it'd been before his dramatic exit from the car. "I'm taking my own car."

Grabbing Tony's arm to stop him from moving, Gibbs tried to see if there were any visible wounds. Anything. As he couldn't see anything, he relaxed, while also knowing there could still be something that was hidden. He would have to remember to ask Ducky later about that wound, to know how worried he should be and if a hospital visit was needed. Giving the first head slap he had ever given to anyone, he finally let go of the worry. "What is wrong with you!? Do you have a death wish!?"

Tony, too dazed over the sudden head slap, didn't say anything for a while. Then he chuckled. "Funny. That's what people keep asking me, but no, I don't have a death wish."

"Then what—"

Tony seemed oddly uncomfortable. "I'm afraid of sitting in a car, when I'm not the one who's driving it."

Gibbs stared at him, remembering the reaction from before, which he had decided to ignore, not thinking it'd be something this serious. "Afraid?"

Tony looked insulted. It was already bad enough that he had to even admit it. "Yes. Afraid. Normal people do get afraid sometimes. And when _you_ are the one driving..."

"Not what I meant." Gibbs felt odd feeling of concern as he only now noticed the slightly glazed look in the green eyes and just how terribly pale Tony was. "Talk to me, kid."

Tony glared at the 'kid' part. "Why do you care?"

"DiNozzo..."

"I was in a car accident long time ago. It's kind of stuck with me now. No big deal."

Gibbs scowled. No big deal? Really? He was torn between being the bastard or being nicer Gibbs for a little while. He chose the middle road. "Get in your car. If I don't see you following me, I'll _glue_ you on the seat next to mine."

Tony stared after Gibbs as the man walked slowly back toward his own car. He was confused. The Gibbs he knew, didn't listen to what he had to say. So why the sudden change? He could still feel the bullet flying past his head and could still smell the alcohol in the man's breath. He could still hear in his head the echos of Gibbs' words from that day.

**" _I'll kill you! It's all your fault!"_**

No. He wasn't going to be fooled by this; he couldn't drop down his guard around the man. Walking to his own car, Tony felt relief wash over him the moment he realized he really did not have to sit in the car with Gibbs. It felt even better the moment he sat inside and he started the engine. There was no flashes of images. No sounds. Nothing. He relaxed.

"Let's show what you're made of, girl," Tony spoke to his car and drove after Gibbs who was already driving, although surprisingly slow, until he saw Tony following him.


	6. Why Me?

Driving to D.C. was worse than Tony had imagined, although the drive itself was easy enough; all he had to do was keep up with Gibbs' insane driving style. Did the man think he was driving a race car or was he really in such a hurry? And who takes a shortcut over a random—luckily shallow enough—water stream and then some corn field? Was the man not afraid that the owner might come after them with a shotgun or something? All that was missing was coming across a flock of sheep crossing the road and Gibbs driving right through them. As if that wasn't enough, the road was ancient, which had the potential of breaking a car or two and Tony found himself praying for his girl.

The odd shortcuts did indeed get them to D.C. much faster than using any real roads would and by the time they stopped inside the Navy Yard, Tony was feeling anxious and ready to flee. He had hoped that the guards there wouldn't let him in, but whatever it was about Gibbs and his way of giving out the orders at them, they didn't question it too much and soon enough Tony found himself parked inside one of the places he never thought he'd be getting anywhere near again.

Seeing Gibbs walking toward his car, Tony finally stepped outside, not giving the man a chance to drag him out himself.

Attaching the visitors pass on his jacket, which Gibbs had magically made appear from somewhere, Tony followed the Agent in the elevator. Inside, the silence was like a heavy blanket and it made Tony's anxiety grow the longer the elevator ride seemed to take. Why did one minute feel like half an hour ride to the torture chamber? When they finally stepped out, the unwelcoming colors of the bullpen did nothing to calm him down.

"Orange walls? Wow. I hope you got your money back and shot whoever decided on the color..."

"Sit down and do _not_ move or touch anything unless I tell you to do so," Gibbs ordered and pointed toward one of the working areas, which Tony assumed was his. Sitting behind one of the desks there, he kept an eye on the stairs where Gibbs had gone to, disappearing somewhere.

It didn't take long for the elevator doors to open again and two agents stepped in the bullpen. Two very tired agents. "What's he doing here?"

Tony was startled from his thoughts and he smirked when he noticed he was being stared at. The whole room full of people had actually been giving him curious glances for a while now, but he didn't pay attention to any of them. He nodded his head to the two agents now staring at him with disbelief plainly written on their faces. "Ah. Agents Blackadder and Langer, right?"

"How did you get here? I mean, what are you even doing here?" Vivian asked. The redhead didn't look exactly happy to see him.

"Your boss decided to make me his happy little helper for a while."

"How is that even possible? We only just made it back."

"Well, as I am sure you both are well aware, your boss fancies his shortcuts," Tony answered and seeing the somewhat smug grin on the woman's face, he kept talking, "But since I care about my life, I came with my own car."

The disbelief on Vivian's face was almost amusing, as if she didn't believe he could possibly keep up with Gibbs. However, the truth was that as much as Tony feared driving in a car, as long as he was behind that wheel, he could pull off the craziest stunts. He needed to have that control over a car if he had to be inside one.

Sometimes Tony wondered if had he been the one driving the car on that day, perhaps things would have turned out differently. Why did he get to live while the other two had to die? They had a life to live and people who cared about them, needed them. What did he have? Who did he have? Nothing. No one needed him, not really, and some suicide undercover missions didn't count. Sure, there were people who claimed to care about him, but Tony had learned his lesson, which was to trust no one. It was only a matter of time before they either turned against him or they died. It always ended up happening. He was alone in this world and although he didn't _try_ to get killed, he didn't try to live either. He was dangerously close to burning out, to say the least, but work was all he had. So why did he get to live?

Truth be told, on that day when Gibbs had pointed that gun at him, a small part of Tony wished the man had killed him with that bullet. Had he moved away a split second too late, their lives might be a whole lot different today. It wasn't just Gibbs Tony was mad at; he was angry at himself too. If he couldn't forgive himself, how could he forgive Gibbs?

"...seat."

"Sorry, what? I wasn't listening."

"It's my seat you're sitting on. My desk." Langer scowled.

Tony chuckled and held up his hands in defeat as he stood up, with a few dramatic moves added in there. "Forgive me. My bad."

Langer chose to ignore it as he took his seat. He couldn't tell why, but he felt strangely threatened by the mere presence of this young Detective. Agent Gibbs would probably call it a gut feeling. Twenty five years old, was he? It had to be a mistake. There was no way someone as young as DiNozzo could have earned the badge. Not with honest ways. Langer began to smile as he thought of something. He could do a background check...

"Say, what was your name again? DiNozzo, right? Anthony DiNozzo? How do you spell it?" Langer spoke as he looked up. The Detective was nowhere to be seen.

"He left the moment you sat down, Brent," Vivian said. She was sitting behind her own desk, brushing her red hair, to make it look less like her morning hair. "Is it some male thing?"

"What is?"

"You know, to feel territorial over your desk." Vivian had a smug smile on her face, but the smile fell off at the angry flash in her partner's eyes.

"I'm the Senior Field Agent here. I don't want some _Detective_ from Baltimore to act like he owns the place. Don't say that you haven't noticed it."

"Noticed what?"

"He acts like he owns the show, wherever he is. And Gibbs... Why would he bring him here?"

"I don't know. Maybe he needed someone from Baltimore to help with the case?"

"But why did he send us away? Have you ever seen him even like spending time with any cops?"

Vivian frowned as she finally caught up with what her partner was thinking. "You think Gibbs wants to hire him?"

"That's exactly what I think, which means one of us is going to have to go."

Staring at each other for a moment, they got into work with sudden urgency.

"It was DiNozzo, right? I'll see what I can find with his name."

"And I'll try to find out how he became Detective. There has to be _something_ there..."

By the time Gibbs returned, he saw his agents working harder than he had ever seen them work, but no sign of DiNozzo anywhere. He frowned, since surely the kid wouldn't _dare_ to go against his orders.

* * *

Walking through the Navy Yard, Tony was pleased to notice that at least the place didn't look too much like it used to in the past; the orange walls were only one of the many differences. He could almost pretend he was someplace else. _Almost_. At some point Tony realized he was standing at the exact same spot where he had cornered Mike Franks back then, after the man had avoided him the best he could. He could still hear the echos of their words in the empty corridor.

_**"Don't you even have a conscience? How can you even look yourself in the mirror?!"  
"Look... Kid. What's happened, happened. Looking like you want to kill me, won't bring them back."  
"You let your Agent be there with no backup! Because of that, two people got killed!  
You can't just walk away from it and put all the blame on the bad guy! You share the blame!"  
"Are you not barking at the wrong tree here now, kid? You share the blame, Tony..."** _

Blinking furiously at the sudden need to cry, Tony turned around and walked away. It had taken years for him to finally realize that Mike had thrown the man's own guilt on his shoulders. He'd never forgive Mike and if they would ever meet again, he would have a hard time to not forget that he was a cop and not just shoot the man right then and there. Although Gibbs might have been happily ignorant all this time, Tony still couldn't believe the man had started working with Mike.

"I love you!"

Tony froze and then he heard a loud noise coming from somewhere.

"Yes! Do it! Show me the magic!" It was a woman's voice. Whoever she was, she seemed to be beyond excited, and like she was high on something.

Unable to hold back his curiosity, Tony went after the source of the noise. He found himself standing in some lab where a loud music was playing and a young woman with raven hair was dancing and doing cartwheels, and then she was again cheering for her machines to do their work. She was dressed in a white lab coat and... Tony stared. The NCIS had a goth working in their lab? A very happy _—hyper—_ goth. She definitely looked nothing like the old hag who used to work here before.

Thinking that he might as well introduce himself, Tony stepped farther in the room. He barely had time to register what was happening after that. He knew he stepped on _something_ , which made a farting sound and then that something slipped away and he was falling.

The music was suddenly dead and the silence was deafening, until he heard the almost high pitched scream, "You killed Bert!"


	7. I'm Glad To Be Here

Rubbing his bottom—and clenching his teeth at the sharp, shooting pain in his torso—Tony sat on the floor where he had fallen down. He stared at the young goth who was now looking for any 'bleeding wounds' on her plush toy, hippo. Bert?

"You're alright!" The woman hugged the toy tightly, making another farting sound with it. She then turned her attention to the young man. "You're lucky today, mister. If you had killed Bert, I would've had to kill you and leave no evidence. Just kidding." She put the toy away in a safe place and held out her hand, which Tony took, although there was a clear hesitation. Pulling the tall man up from the floor with surprising ease, Abby studied him with curiosity. "I'm Abigail Sciuto. Abby to you. Who are you?"

"Tony. Anthony DiNozzo."

"What are you doing here? Are you lost?"

"Not really. I'm Detective from Baltimore. Agent Gibbs forced me to work with him."

For some reason that got Abby's full attention and there was odd sparkle in her eyes. "Did he?"

"You don't believe me?"

"So Bossman actually brought you here? You're positive? _He_ brought you here? _He_ forced someone to work with _him_? He _wants_ to work with a cop?"

"That's what I said."

Abby had almost predatory look in her eyes as she smirked. "Interesting, _very_ interesting indeed... So, Detective. You look kind of young to be one."

Tony clenched his teeth. He was sick of everyone telling him that. "I'll be twenty-six this year."

Abby gave him a once over. "Really? I thought you're way younger than that. Then we are the same age, which is awesome. Finally someone from the same age group as I am and who isn't someone Gibbs is trying to get rid of. I swear, his latest probie has vanished somewhere. Maybe Bossman finally snapped and hid his body. But then he should have told me and I could have helped him hide the body and..."

The look on Tony's face darkened, but the woman didn't seem to notice. She just kept talking, which he mostly tuned out. A tap on his shoulder brought his attention back to Abby, who was now surprisingly close to him. Too close. Way over the line of his comfort zone, so he took a step back.

"Anyway. Since you're already a Detective, it must mean you're that good, which is great. Gibbs needs someone good."

Tony blinked. This was first. Usually people assumed he had done something unseemly to get his badge. It was even worse once they found out about his so called 'privileged' family background and what kind of mother hen the Police Chief Frost was toward him. The old man didn't understand that he _did not_ want any protection from him. Did not want any added attention from anyone. He was trying his best to stay in the shadows just so he wouldn't be noticed too much, but no... Now he had people like his boss breathing down his neck, which made doing his own job so much harder.

"Since we're going to be seeing each other much more now..." Abby took one step closer and Tony found himself taking one step back again. Abby, clueless as she was, didn't see the warning signs and wrapped her arms around him in her usual bone crushing hug. She was giggling at the discomfort she could feel radiating from the stiff form. "You're not a hugger, are you? That's cute. Don't worry, I will make sure you get used to it." Stepping back, the smile on Abby's face fell. The mask on Tony's face had disappeared, replaced by a vulnerable look. "I didn't hurt you or anything? People keep telling me I sometimes forget my own strength."

Tony closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths, forcing a shaky smile on his face. "I'm fine."

She didn't look convinced. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure. I'm good."

Abby bit her lip. She had a strong feeling everything was not good. "If you're sure..."

"Yeah. I'm sure. I just don't like being touched. I can shake hands and such, but no hugging. Don't take it personally; I'm just not that kind of guy."

Abby narrowed her eyes, taking it as a challenge rather than a warning to be left alone. "Alright... And hey, it's good to have you here, Tony." Since Gibbs brought him here, it could only be a good sign, she mused.

Tony flashed his trademark smile as he lied, "I'm glad to be here."

Abby smiled widely and she had to hold herself back, to not hug the man again. Might be a little too soon for another one of her hugs, she figured. But there was just something so _huggable_ about him.

"I better get going. Gibbs ordered me to stay in the bullpen, but here I am."

"Uh-oh..." Abby smirked when she saw the mischief in the young Detective's eyes.

Tony left the lab and soon enough the music was back on. He let his smile disappear. It was too easy manipulating the many masks on his face. It was a child's game to him; something he had been good at since the early days in his childhood. He could fool anyone with it and—

"Gibbs." Tony stared. The Agent was standing right outside the lab. One look and he knew Gibbs had seen and heard the whole thing. "Sorry. I know I was supposed to be staying where you told me to stay, but I'm not that great at following orders sometimes." Tony grinned, easily masking his nervousness.

Gibbs didn't say anything. He raised his hand toward the back of Tony's head, but the young man flinched away even before the hand touched him. Was it because of the head slap from before or..? Gibbs frowned and let his hand fall down, while Tony took a couple of steps away from him. They both stared at the empty space separating them.

"So. Are we ready to get to work then or what?" Tony finally asked, now masking the nervousness with sudden eagerness to get to work, when in reality he wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

"Follow me."

Tony was surprised that the man didn't say anything else, didn't ask anything; Gibbs didn't even look mad. It was not the kind of reaction Tony thought he'd get when he had decided to leave the bullpen against the man's orders. Feeling almost meek, yet angry at the same time, Tony followed the older man in the elevator where the silence for some reason felt even heavier than before.

* * *

Sitting in his car, Gibbs was driving slower than usual and he kept glancing at DiNozzo's car from the rearview mirror.

His mind kept replaying the scene in the lab where he had seen a whole different side of the young Detective, which somehow had destroyed every other image he'd had of the kid so far; arrogant, possibly dangerous, a brat and maybe even bit of a 'bad cop'. Now none of that seemed to fit and Gibbs found himself rethinking everything. Even if it had been just for a short moment, he had seen the kid being just that. A kid. So young and even scared. Then there had been a strange feeling of déjà vu and for the first time Gibbs had a feeling that he had met the Detective somewhere. Where and how? Those were the questions he couldn't find the answers to, no matter how hard he tried digging through his memory.

"Just who are you, DiNozzo?"

In his own car, Tony was equally frustrated, but for different reasons. Unlike Gibbs he had the answers, only he didn't know what to do with them.

* * *

They parked their cars across the street, which caused some of the people there give them nasty looks, but since it was Gibbs they were left alone pretty soon.

Walking toward the nice looking white house, Tony stopped for a moment to stare at it. All the houses on the street were the perfect family homes; the kind where you would think any child could be happy to grow up. Obviously the pretty picture wasn't always the truth and as a cop Tony was painfully aware of the truth behind many closed doors, but even so, he found himself full of longing. His childhood 'home' was nothing compared to these. There had been no warmth and the size of the building had been just plain ridiculous and complete waste of space and money.

"You coming today, DiNozzo?"

"Yeah, yeah..." Tony muttered and hurried after his 'temporary boss'. "Who did you say lives here?" he asked while they were standing behind the door, after ringing the doorbell.

Gibbs glared, knowing full well DiNozzo knew he hadn't said anything. "The victim's parents."

The door was opened, revealing a long-legged blonde young woman. Gibbs asked if the elderly couple living there was at home and she nodded. "Mom and dad are watching TV. Who did you say you are?"

"We're from NCIS. I'm afraid we have some bad news... Can we come inside?" Gibbs asked, after showing his ID. The woman's eyes went wide and she nodded again, letting them inside. Gibbs had completely surprised Tony with the almost compassionate and gentle tone of voice. Then Tony scowled at the ' _we're_ _from NCIS_ ' part, although he hid it from the woman.

Following the woman to where Tony assumed the parents were, he whispered to Gibbs, "Is she the victim's sister? Wow... I mean, _wow_... I could interview her— Ow!" He flinched at the sudden slap against the back of his head and took a step back, rubbing his head with wide eyes. "What was that for?" he hissed quietly. When he only received a glare as the answer, he kept walking, but kept a safe distance to the older man.

"Everything okay?" the woman asked, looking over her shoulder and Tony flashed his winning smile, which obviously had the right affect on her, but then he noticed something on the woman's finger. A ring _._ It had been too good to be true... Forcing the mask of professionalism on his face, Tony decided to let Gibbs handle things the way he wanted.

"DiNozzo," Gibbs spoke quietly. "You will interview her only after they've had some time to deal with the bad news first, got it?"

Tony glared at Gibbs. Did he think he was heartless or just plain stupid?

And just because Gibbs was Gibbs. "Not his sister. She's the victim's wife."

Tony flinched at that. Time to completely tune down his charm then.

"Mom... Dad..." the woman spoke once they were all in the living room. The old couple looked at them curiously. "These men are from the NCIS."

At the confused looks, Gibbs started explaining, "It stands for Naval—"

"Criminal Investigative Service. We know. What is it you people want from us?" the man questioned. Tony and Gibbs shared a look at the hostile tone.

"It's about your son," Gibbs carefully said, but in truth, there never was any careful way of putting it. "I'm sorry to have to say this... Your son was found dead."

Deadly silence took over the room, until the old woman's scream broke it. "No!" she screamed, but seeing the serious looks, she screamed again, which soon broke into a mother's heart broken sobs. "I knew it..! I knew something was wrong..!"

Tony was feeling as bad as one would feel in such situation, until from the corner of his eye he saw the smile; so small and gone so fast that he almost thought he had imagined it. He sighed inwardly. _Not the wife again_... Leaning closer, Tony whispered to Gibbs, "I'll take the wife, you take the parents."

Gibbs turned around to say something about not rushing with it, but he only saw DiNozzo's retreating back as he walked away with the woman.

"Really. I am grateful. You see, I have this bastard boss who doesn't really care about the need for a few breaks now and then. I'm so thirsty I bet my throat looks like a sandpaper right now. Feels like it..."

For a moment, Gibbs thought he heard the woman chuckle, but he dismissed the thought and hid a smile of his own at the young man's comment, which was obviously meant to irritate him. Somehow he didn't really mind, but instead found himself amused by it. Keeping the amusement away from his face, Gibbs calmly gave his answers to the sudden flow of questions from the grieving parents.


	8. I Knew Someone Like You Once

Drinking his glass of water, Tony sat down in the kitchen. He could feel her eyes on him, sizing him up. It was the same kind of look he would give to the women he was undressing in his head. Oddly enough, he felt almost violated. Also, how many wives of their dead husbands would be flirting with another man, right after such bad news? Not exactly his kind of woman to flirt with, which was a shame since as far as the looks went, she was exactly his type. His 'one night stand' type, to be more precise.

"Thank you for the water and again, I am sorry for your loss," Tony finally said and the woman stared him for a moment, as if confused what he was talking about. Then she sighed. It was deep and a little too dramatic sigh.

"Yes. He was supposed to be returning home tomorrow." She sighed again and then her face twisted, looking as if she was trying to force some tears to come out. It didn't work.

"What was he doing in Baltimore?" Tony asked. He was trying to keep things professional, which was getting slightly difficult when the woman's fingers 'accidentally' brushed over his shoulder and then she was leaning against the table, giving him the perfect view inside her shirt. He knew what she was doing, trying to distract him from asking too many questions or at least not pay enough attention. _  
_

"He never told me. Other than that he was meeting someone in there. A friend maybe."

He stood up, stopping the woman from any further flirting as he walked away from her, putting the now empty glass in the sink. "I see. He didn't call you? Anything?"

"Oh? No, he did not."

Taking out his business card, Tony gave it to her. "If you remember anything, give me a call."

She looked at the card, narrowing her eyes slightly. "Detective? Not Agent? I thought you called the Agent your boss."

Tony cringed inwardly; only his acting skills kept the look on his face neutral. He shrugged and smirked as if it was nothing. "Detective who is working with the NCIS Agent. He is my temporary boss."

She nodded slightly then. She took a step closer and before he had time to react she had given him a kiss on the cheek, which honestly to him felt like the kiss of death. He barely stopped himself from flinching away and shuddering. "I'll make sure to keep this with me. I'll be sure to call you. Detective..." She held out the business card and stroked his left arm with her long cold fingers.

Forcing himself again to not flinch away at the constant touching, Tony flashed his megawatt smile and lowered his voice just enough to be borderline flirting, but never crossing the line. He hadn't yet come across a woman who didn't fall for it and neither did he now. "You do that. And once more, I'm sorry for your loss." Just to remind her she was supposed to be a grieving widow.

Going back to the living room, Tony saw Gibbs trying to get out the most basic things from the father, who was first to recover enough to talk.

Seeing DiNozzo return with the victim's wife, made Gibbs frown, although he managed to hide it from the family. He saw the lipstick stain on the kid's cheek and the woman kept throwing smoldering 'bedroom eyes' toward the Detective. There was going to be one big 'talk' between him and DiNozzo later... Had he actually looked at Tony himself, he would've seen silent yet desperate pleas being thrown his way.

* * *

Walking side by side, both men were quiet. They would be coming back later, once the family had been given enough time to get over the bigger shock. When they were almost to their cars, Gibbs held up his hand to head slap the kid, but stopped it just in time when Tony spoke, "It's the wife. It has to be the wife."

"What?"

"Our murderer."

"Based on what?"

Tony shrugged helplessly. "It's... I saw her smile."

Gibbs opened his car door, but hearing that he turned around. "You saw her smile. That all you can go with, DiNozzo? You make your decisions based on something like that?"

Tony looked insulted, before he covered it with a calm mask. "Of course not. There's also the whole thing of her getting all over me in the kitchen. You should've seen her. I'm glad we weren't the only ones in the house or who knows what she would have done to me then... She's anything but a grieving widower. Besides, I know these types of people; women like her... And she never mentioned anything about her daughter. Now that I think about it, I don't think I even saw any pictures of the girl in the parents' house either." When Gibbs just stared, Tony sighed. " _And_ I've got this feeling. This... I don't know how to explain it."

"Gut feeling. That's more like it, DiNozzo. Next time, say it as it is."

Tony opened his car door. "Whatever you say... So, where are we going next?"

"Just follow me and you'll find out."

* * *

He should've been focusing on more than just keeping up with Gibbs and his car. Maybe then he would have noticed where they were going. Maybe _then_ Gibbs would have never gotten so much closer to remembering. Or maybe he would have at least been much more prepared. All those 'what ifs' were pretty useless now.

Closing his car door, Tony furrowed his brows; the house looked strangely familiar. Suddenly the house looked way more than just familiar. "Gibbs... Why are we here?"

"My wife. She will kill me if I don't show her my face once in a while." Gibbs sounded irritated and Tony licked his suddenly dry lips as the feeling of dread kept growing.

"Mind if I wait in my car then? Don't want to get in between you two when the bullets start to fly." He laughed nervously, making Gibbs roll his eyes.

The front door opened and a redheaded woman stepped outside. The look on her face was something between glowering and smiling, as if she wasn't sure what to feel. "Jethro! I was starting to fear the food would get cold before you come home. Again. Who is this?"

Gibbs smiled slightly and shook his head. Grabbing Tony's arm, he dragged him to the door, before the kid could escape. "He's the Detective I told you about."

His wife frowned slightly when she saw how pale the young man was. "Are you alright? Jethro, I think you might be hurting the poor boy."

"I'm fine," Tony muttered, but was glad when Gibbs released his arm.

"Why don't you join us? I made plenty of food to feed a small army."

"No, I'm good. Don't want to be a bother. Besides, I'm not really hungry and..." Tony's words disappeared somewhere at the 'look' she was giving him. It had to be a family thing.

"Jethro doesn't bring any friends home, so now that you're here of course you're joining us."

Tony swallowed and forced a smile on his face as he nodded. "Okay then. I would love to."

"What's your name?" she asked and let the men inside, before closing the door.

"Tony."

"Tony, huh?" She got distant look on her face as she smiled sadly. "I knew this kid named Tony once. Many years ago."

"I see."

"But he died, instead of me and my daughter, who were the intended targets... We never even got the chance to say thank you or sorry."

_Died_? Tony frowned. "I'm sorry to hear that."

The woman took off his jacket, without asking for his permission. He was pretty sure if she could, she would even take his shoes off.

"But how rude of me. I haven't introduced myself." She held out her hand, which Tony took. He hoped she didn't notice his hand shaking. It brought out bunch of memories he hadn't been thinking about in years. He could still remember their first meeting.

**_"You sure don't look your age... Don't take it the wrong way, but you must be one of the cutest things I have ever seen..._ **  
**_Even my daughter agrees. Don't you, sweetheart?"_ **

"I'm Shannon. Shannon Gibbs."


	9. Fading Memories

Entering the house wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. He didn't get thrown into some painful memory lane; he merely saw and heard them coming from a distance, like some echo of what he once knew and remembered as clearly as a daylight. It scared him how he could barely remember the faces of those he'd lost and loved so dearly. Didn't matter how many times he kept looking at their photos.

Following the couple, Tony stopped on the way to look at the big family picture on the wall. Kelly sure had grown up.

"That's our daughter," Shannon spoke when she saw Tony looking at the picture.

"Where is she?"

"She's in college now. Hard to believe she's all grown up. I think Jethro is in denial. She'll always be his little girl, no matter how hard she may rebel against it sometimes. Come on now. Let's eat. You could use some more meat on your bones. Doesn't anyone feed you?"

He didn't bother mentioning that he was barely out of the hospital, after being stuck in there for a good while, not that he normally had much time for cooking. "Sure..."

* * *

Having finished taking his much needed shower, Gibbs walked toward the kitchen where both his wife and the Detective were. For some reason the kid had insisted that he at least helped clean the table and washed the dishes. Hearing the two of them talk, he stopped to listen out of habit.

Putting away the last plate, Tony sat on a chair. "So... Tell me about this... this other Tony. Who was he?"

Shannon looked sad. "Ah, that poor child. I barely even knew him. He was the younger brother of the Agent who was protecting me and Kelly, almost ten years ago. My daughter and I almost died, but then the young Agent, Tony and the girl who was with them were killed instead. It was a case of wrong place, wrong time."

"How did they die?"

Shannon shook his head. "I don't remember much, but I think they were all shot to death. Ah. No, wait. Tony died in the car crash... At least it was a quick death for them, so that's some comfort, but no child should ever have to die so violently."

"How do you know?"

"Mike Franks—my husband's former boss—told us. When I woke up in a hospital bed and found out that two kids were dead because of me, I was devastated. I don't think Kelly ever got truly over it either."

"I'm sorry to hear that..." Tony stood up. He'd heard enough. Mike Franks, again. "It was nice meeting you, ma'am."

"Shannon. It was very nice meeting you too, Tony. And thank you for your help."

"It was the least I could do." Tony smiled sadly when he realized suddenly that after almost ten years he finally got to eat the food made by Shannon. Last time they never got that far. Come to think of it, many things were never done or finished after that fateful day.

Leaving the kitchen, Tony went straight to the front door where Gibbs was already putting his coat on. "You really need to stop that eavesdropping habit of yours," Tony said out of the blue. He could see from the flash of surprise and shame on the man's face that Gibbs was so busted...

Rather than apologizing, Gibbs wanted answers. "Do I know you?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course you do. We are working together. For now."

"Have we _met_ before? Before Baltimore." Gibbs felt like a bear with a very big splinter when DiNozzo had the audacity to give him that innocent look and a shrug.

"Can't say we have. I don't think I'd be forgetting a bastard like you."

"Don't smart ass me. Do you know my wife?"

"No. Never met before. She's lovely, both of your girls are, from what I can tell. You're a blessed man, Gibbs." When Tony saw that Gibbs was thinking about the next words, he escaped in his car, leaving the other man staring after him for a while until Gibbs finally gave up and slowly got in his own car.

While they were driving, Gibbs' mind was going back and forth between all the pieces of the puzzle he had. Then there was also his own gut feelings. He was now more sure than ever that they had met before. The question was when, how and where? And why couldn't he remember? A flash of memory made Gibbs hit the brakes, nearly causing Tony to crash with his car, as they had both been speeding. Suddenly flooded with memory after memory, Gibbs just sat in his car in the middle of the street, frozen, as he started remembering.

**_He pulled the trigger and the wide-eyed boy with his startling green eyes barely jumped away in time,_ **  
**_falling in the middle of the remains of his boat, which he had destroyed in his fury._ **  
**_"You made them get in that car! You hurt them! You did it!"_ **

Throwing the car door open, Gibbs jumped out and saw that Tony was already standing outside, looking confused and wary. "Gibbs? What's wrong? Did something happen?"

Gibbs didn't answer, but instead he walked straight to the Detective and then took bruising hold of Tony's arm, yanking him closer.

"What are you doing?" Tony swallowed, trying to pull his arm free, but the strong Marine grip didn't loosen. Next thing he knew, Gibbs had other painfully strong hold on his chin as he turned Tony's head from one side to another, studying his face with intense look of concentration. Tony kept averting his gaze until Gibbs had enough.

"Look at me!" Gibbs finally barked, and Tony did; his wide green eyes met the old man's shock filled eyes. "I remember. I remember you."


	10. Our Past, How Does It Shape Us?

**_\- ALMOST 10 YEARS AGO -_ **

"Please, Tony? Can I drive? You promised."

"I know. Later, okay?"

She gave him the biggest pout and opened her mouth for another round of begging, when the sound of a police car sirens got their attention.

"Oh _come on_..." Tony sighed and stopped his car. He then took out all the necessary documents. "This is now what, third time today? I'm pretty sure it's by now borderline harassment."

The cop walked to the car and it was obvious from the look the man gave Tony what he was thinking. Somehow Tony kept his calm when the questions began. "What are you kids doing? Stole your daddy's car?" the man was condescending and mocking.

Tony almost snorted. He hadn't even _seen_ his old man in years. Smiling sweetly, he handed the documents before the cop even had the chance to ask for them. "No. I bought this little baby myself."

The man glared and opened his mouth to say something else when he finally looked at the ID. The smile on the man's face was smug, almost like the smile of Grinch. Did the kid think he was an idiot? "Fake ID? Son, you're in big trouble now. Step out of the car and keep your hands where I can see them."

"Tony?"

"It's alright, Jeanne. The idiot thinks he's some big shot," Tony muttered as he was trying to keep his girlfriend from worrying, which didn't work too well when the man yanked the door open before Tony had even time to react and pulled him out violently, like he was some dangerous criminal. "Hey. Easy there, man."

However the cop, thinking this kid would be an easy prey for him, cuffed Tony and didn't listen to what the two teenagers were trying to say.

* * *

"What do you think you were doing out there?! Did you have to treat them like some big criminals carrying weapons or drugs?! They're kids!"

Tony grinned as he was listening to the very loud and public stripping down the cop received from his boss. It was almost worth all the trouble they'd been put through all day.

"Did you even read them their rights!? Answer me, Bolton!"

The cop Bolton's whole face was red and he hadn't said a whole lot since his boss had stormed in the room.

"Excuse me," one of the young police officers spoke to his boss, sounding far too cheerful.

"What!?"

"Sorry, but a man wants to see you."

"Tell him I'm busy!"

"It's about those two kids Forest brought in." There was almost gleeful look on the young cop's face as he glanced toward Bolton. Obviously not a fan then.

"Finally. So did their parents come?"

"Not exactly..."

"Howard!" Tony cheered out and waved toward the—thirty something—man entering the room with his usual swagger. As calmly as the man moved, the look on his face was stormy. It only softened for a moment, when he smiled at the two teens sitting there. Then he turned toward Bolton and his boss.

"Let me get this straight. You _arrested_ my brother and his girlfriend for no reason whatsoever?" Howard sounded calm, but one look from him made anyone too close to him take one or few steps back. As handsome as his face looked, right now there was something primal about him and no one had any doubts that if given the chance, he'd tear into pieces anyone who had _dared_ to go after one of his own.

"And you are?" the now weary looking boss asked.

"NIS Agent Howard."

"NIS?"

"Stands for Naval Investigative Service."

"I know what it stands for. Why does someone from the—"

"So is this the idiot who treated my kids like some world-class criminals?" Howard pointed his thumb toward Bolton, who didn't look one bit like someone who's willing to admit he had done something wrong.

"He's the one..."

"Good. In that case—"

Whatever Bolton's fate might have been in the hands of the young Agent, no one would find out. Knowing his surrogate brother and how far he could go—threatening to rip out the internal organs of his little brother's bullies wasn't the worst of it—Tony decided to step in. Walking to the menacing man, Tony held his hand on his brother's arm, which stopped the words leaving Howard's mouth. "Can't we just go now? Jeanne and I are both really tired and I still need to get my car back from the thieving cops."

Howard threw one last nasty glare at the cops, before he nodded. "Of course. Don't worry about your car; already got someone to get it and take it to my work place."

The look on Tony's face was that of pure horror. "Y-You... You let someone else drive her?"

Howard laughed, which completely transformed his face, and pushed the kids toward the door. Before following them, he turned around. "Hey. You." He enjoyed seeing the Bolton guy flinch at his tone. Once Howard was sure he had the cop's full attention, he pointed at himself, then at his eyes with two fingers and then he pointed at Bolton. The ' _I'll be watching you_ ' gesture added to his death glare, made finally even Bolton break and look afraid, to the point where the man became pale. Howard didn't move from his spot where he had nailed the cop with his glare, until he smelled the familiar odor filling the air. Smirking and with raised eyebrows, he glanced toward the darkening area on the cop's pants. He nodded once and walked outside.

"You did it again, didn't you?" Tony scowled at Howard, once he joined the two teenagers in his car. "Do you have to scare everyone who even looks at me the wrong way, Howie?"

Howard glared and wasn't surprised when the kid wasn't one bit affected by it. "Yes. That idiot should not even be a cop in the first place. He's the type that gives rest of them a bad name. You did nothing wrong. It's not your fault that you look so cute and adorable. Plus, you attract trouble like a supersized magnet, so someone has to look after you."

"I hate you..."

"I love you too, kid." Howard grinned. He reached his hand toward the kid's head and ruffled the hair affectionately. He was perhaps the only one Tony ever let this close and he loved showing his affection whenever he could. Okay, so maybe Jeanne _was_ slowly getting on that very short list as well...

"Hey!" Tony slapped the hand away. Trying to fix his hairstyle, he glanced to the back seat where Jeanne was sitting, and he sighed. "Why are you taking his side?"

Jeanne smirked. She'd been watching the whole thing with great amusement. "Who? Me? How could I? You two are just so cute."

Both Howard and Tony looked at her like she had lost her mind. "Cute?"

"You're even in sync with each other... I swear, if I didn't know any better, I would think you two are real brothers."

Tony wasn't sure whether to feel proud or annoyed. Howard however had a wide smile on his face as he reached over to ruffle Tony's hair again. He smirked at the 'if looks could kill' glare he got from the sixteen years old. "What? I can't help it. You're my baby brother." 

"Would you stop it? It's the same reason why I'm getting so much trouble all the time. Cops think my ID is fake or that I've stolen my parents' car or something else just as fun."

"Don't worry about it too much, kid. You're just... late bloomer." Howard looked completely unapologetic.

"Late bloomer... I swear, if I don't get taller by the time I'm eighteen and start growing some proper... _facial_ hair, I'll start believing I'm doomed to always look few years younger than I really am." The red face and hesitation at the 'hair' comment, was a giveaway exactly what kind of hair Tony was thinking about.

Jeanne giggled on the backseat and Howard snickered. "Hey. If I were you, I wouldn't complain. Too much. Do you have any idea how many people even at my age would give anything to look younger?"

Tony muttered something only Jeanne heard, which made her laugh and lean forward to give a soft kiss on his cheek.

"What?" Howard looked at them curiously, while driving away from the police station.

"Nothing..."

Jeanne answered for Tony, "He said, _say that again when your own girlfriend is taller than you and looks like someone at her age should look like_."

"Fair point. Don't worry, kid, your girl loves you anyway."

"I love you anyway," Jeanne agreed with a smile. There was a ghost of smile on Tony's face, before it was gone.

They had been driving for few minutes, when Tony smirked at his sudden thought. "Did he wet his pants?"

"It was impossible to miss."

"Nice... I don't think it should be called death glare or whatever it is. More like... I don't know... Pee glare? PG? Or maybe urine glare? Urine eyes?"

Howard glanced to the passenger seat and hid his smile. He couldn't even remember how he had lived his life before that fateful day, when his father brought home that small and skinny boy; a relative he had barely even heard of. It took over a year to make the boy smile and only a little less to speak without given permission. Being a grown man already, and with a life of his own, Howard hadn't thought then that he'd be spending his time around the twelve-year-old. Didn't think he'd grow so deeply attached to the boy. A boy who was hiding far too many scars. During the worst moments, Howard found himself staring at his gun and fantasized how he'd burst into the DiNozzo mansion to kill Senior, but one look into the child's innocent eyes and any homicidal plans would vanish. For a moment anyway. So instead he kept trying to find out anything that would put DiNozzo Senior behind the bars.

"I mean, you've got to admit that it would be more fitting. People don't really die when you look at them. Instead they end up wetting their pants. Who does that? I surely never wet my pants. Not even as a kid. Senior would've beat the crap out of me if I did."

Howard hid the flash of anger in his eyes from Tony. If he'd ever get his hands on Senior... "Well, he's not here now. You can wet your pants all you want." Howard grinned, knowing without looking that there was disturbed look on Tony's face.

"Are you trying to embarrass me in front of my girlfriend?"

"Don't mind me." Jeanne giggled.

Howard smiled at the angry look Tony threw at him. It was one of the few times the kid actually acted more like a kid, rather than someone as old as he—Howard—was. Four years... That's how long they had been a family. Felt much longer than that. He wished it _had_ been longer. "Let's stop on our way to get some food. What do you kids want?"

Tony's whole face lightened up and he looked hopeful and almost shy. "Pizza."

Jeanne bit her tongue, to not comment just how unhealthy it was to want to eat pizza each time. Seeing that look on Tony's face did it each time. She could imagine how dangerous it would be once he found out he could get almost anything if he just let people see that...

"Pizza it is then," Howard finally agreed with a defeated sigh, once he got the one worded agreement from Jeanne.

* * *

"So what do you think?" Howard grinned widely as they stepped in the bullpen. They had spent good hour and a half just eating pizza and talking. He knew his boss was going to kill him, but he had nowhere near enough time to spend with Tony and now the kid even got himself a girlfriend of all things... Oh, jealousy was an ugly thing.

Jeanne was clearly in awe as she stared around the room and then at the agents staring at them with good amount of curiosity. Howard was bit of a celebrity there so anything he did or didn't do was immediately noticed.

Tony shrugged, holding his hands deep in his jacket's pockets. "It's alright I guess."

Howard blinked and then covered up his laughter with a cough. He pointed toward his desk. "Sit there while I'll go and see where my boss is."

Tony walked to the desk, and pushing bunch of papers away, he sat on it. Jeanne joined him, sitting properly and like a lady on a chair."Are you in trouble, Howie?" Tony had a smile on his face, but there was also more than a hint of worry.

Howard made a face. "Most likely. I did kind of run off in the middle of this important case."

The smile on Tony's face fell and he frowned, looking guilty as he stared at his shoes.

"It's not your fault," Howard started, walking closer.

"But if I hadn't called you, you wouldn't have left your work."

Howard put his finger under the kid's chin and made him look at him. "Not your fault. You want to blame someone, blame that cop who doesn't even know how to do his own job. Got it?" Tony shrugged, trying to look away, only Howard didn't let him. "I said, do you understand? I can't help it when I know someone I care about needs help, you know that. I would have been very upset and angry if you hadn't called me."

Tony smiled uncertainly and nodded. "Alright..." The moment Howard let go of his chin, he dropped his gaze. He barely even noticed it at first, but then he felt a slender hand taking hold of his hand. Looking over his shoulder and seeing the soft and gentle smile on Jeanne's beautiful face, Tony smiled too. The day Jeanne had told him out of blue that she wanted to be his girlfriend, in front of the whole school, he had completely frozen and then in shock uttered the word 'yes' without even understanding what was happening. After two years, he still didn't regret it though.

It amazed him every day... Tony still couldn't believe how he had people like Jeanne and Howard in his life. Then there was also Howard's father. He had even gotten plenty of friends at school, much to his shock and confusion. He didn't understand it... Why did they want to spend their time with someone like him? Senior had drilled it in his head all his life that he wasn't worth to be loved and to be taken care of. And as much as Tony was still in denial about it, to some extent his mother hadn't been much better.

Howard was feeling a mix of emotions when he saw the loving looks shared between the two kids, surely too young to be dating anyone yet. He felt jealous again, since it meant it wasn't just he anymore to receive that still too rare smile. He felt happiness, since Tony was finally learning what it was like to be loved. And then there was the worry that if anything at all would go wrong, what kind of damage it would leave behind.

"Be nice, kids," Howard warned before leaving them there. He barely made it in the elevator when his partner joined him. Sighing inwardly, Howard counted to ten in his mind.

"So who's the kid, _Howie_?" The smug grin on the Agent's face disappeared the moment his back hit the wall as he was pushed and then held against it.

"It's Agent Howard to you, _probie_. Got it?" Howard spoke with a low voice and the younger man swallowed. "Who he is or who he isn't, it has nothing to do with you. You just focus doing your job. That would be a nice change."

The Agent snorted. "Like you do? The way you left, boss is going to eat you alive. Maybe even fire you."

"Franks is _my_ problem. Until he does kick me out I am still your superior, your boss when he's not around, and I am telling you now to mind your own business. Do you understand?"

The only answer he received was a slight nod and he let go of the shirt he'd been holding. He tried to ignore the angry stare he could feel behind him. He didn't have time for childish games right now. He would deal with the idiot later.

* * *

Mike Franks stormed in the bullpen. For a moment he stopped to stare at the two kids at Howard's desk. He turned toward his agents and one of them spoke while the question was still lingering on his lips, "Howard brought them."

Frowning, Mike watched as the girl laughed softly at something the boy had said. They both froze when he cleared his throat loudly. "Who are you? Where's Howard?"

The teenagers shared a look, unsure what to say to the man who was obviously Howard's boss. Tony finally spoke, "He went to look for you." He slipped off the desk on his feet and keeping his back straight and voice steady, he looked straight in the man's eyes. "He didn't do anything wrong."

"What?"

"Howard. I got into some trouble and he came to help. If you want to blame someone, blame me, not him."

Mike sighed and leaned against his own desk. "Look... Kid. What do you know about our job?"

Tony shrugged. It wasn't like Howard ever told him all the details about the work he did. No matter how often Tony tried to find out more.

"Our work is important, but it's also dangerous. We give justice to people and sometimes we also protect them. I need to know that I can trust my Agent—my Second In Command—to listen to my orders and obey them. That I can trust he is watching my back, no matter what. Having a good partner is everything with this kind of work. This time we were not working in the field, but I need to know I can trust him to not run off in the middle of a case, leaving me possibly with no partner to watch my back."

Tony frowned. "He wouldn't do that. No, really, he wouldn't. It really was my fault for calling him like that. I'm sorry."

"Look, kid. I do need to have a little talk with him because of this. However, like I said, we weren't in the field and I will give him a chance to prove that he won't run off like that again, with no word. Just between you and me, I know he wouldn't leave me in the field with no backup. He's one of the best agents we've had and he knows better than most the importance of always having a good partner or a backup."

Tony sighed, understanding that this was as good as it was going to get. "It still was my fault though."

"Yes, yes..." Mike chuckled.

"Boss!" They turned around to see Howard stepping out of the elevator. "I've been looking all over for you and then they told me you're already here..." Walking to the work area, he looked uncertainly between his boss and Tony. He was worrying what Franks might have said or done while he wasn't there. Mike could be many things, but being smooth with his words and actions wasn't one of them.

"What were you thinking?" Mike asked with surprising calmness.

Howard looked completely unapologetic for someone who might get a good whipping. Metaphorically speaking of course. "Sorry, boss. Won't happen again."

"You better make sure it won't," Mike growled and then he completely changed the subject. "Shannon and Kelly Gibbs."

"What?"

"Those are the two you will be protecting."

"I will— Wait, what?"

"Had you stayed there, while we went over the details, you would know. Congratulations. You were chosen. Their husband and father is a Marine."

"Well, obviously," Howard mumbled.

Mike ignored him. "And it's our duty to make sure his family is safe when he can't do it. Any questions?"

"Why do they need protection in the first place?"

"The wife, Shannon, witnessed a murder."

Howard grimaced. So it was protecting a witness. "When do I have to go?"

"Now."

"Now?" Howard glanced toward the kids who were listening to the conversation, and especially Tony seemed to be absorbing every word with eagerness that sometimes worried Howard, which was why he tried to not share too many gory details about his job. That in turn made the boy even sneakier at getting his many questions answered... Perhaps he really was just a little too overprotective and subconsciously refused to believe that Tony no longer was that same quiet little boy he once was.

"Yes. Now."

Howard muttered a soft curse. "Can I at least first make sure the kids make it safely to my place?"

"It's alright. It's not like we need to be looked after," Tony interrupted. "As long as I get my car, we can get there on our own." There was a slightly forced smile on his face.

"I'm sorry..."

"It's fine, Howie. This is important. It's your work."

Howard sighed. He was feeling strangely upset how eagerly he was being sent to do his job. "If _anything_ happens..."

"I'll call... your boss." Tony changed the ' _you_ ' to ' _your boss_ ' after seeing the look Mike gave him.

Howard frowned and then he pulled Tony into his tight embrace, ignoring the muffled complaints against his chest. "Be careful. Both of you." He shared a look with Jeanne, who nodded, and then he turned to look at his boss. "So then..."

Mike handed him the case files. "Don't disappoint me."

"He won't," Tony spat out and Howard was grinning proudly at his personal cheerleader.

"He's right. I won't."

* * *

"Are you sure this is okay?" worried Jeanne asked for the second time.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Of course. Howard told me it's safe right now and even that boss of his said it's okay, and I quote, _as long as you're not in the way_."

"Alright then. But you still owe me that driving lesson you promised me."

"Anything you say, Jeanne."

The door opened before they had time to knock or ring the doorbell. Howard stood there, letting his eyes wipe over the area before dragging them inside. The man looked stressed out and there were deep lines of worry on his face. "What are you two doing here?"

Tony and Jeanne shared a confused look. "What do you mean?" Tony wondered.

"It's not safe."

The confusion changed into glare and Tony crossed his arms over his chest. "Really? Then why did you tell me it's safe when I called you?"

"That..." Howard didn't know what to say. He had said it to keep the kids from worrying, and knowing Tony, from running straight to him.

"Besides, your boss said it's okay to come to see you."

"He did?" Howard furrowed his brows in confusion, wondering just what Franks was thinking. His own safety was one thing, but sending the kids here, now of all times? Had the bastard finally lost his mind?

"We're not staying. We only came to say goodbye."

"Goodbye?" Howard repeated, even more confused.

"Well, yeah. We only came to spend the weekend. It's time to go back home. You know, school and all."

Had it already been almost three days? Howard's eyes widened. "Tony... Kid... I'm so sorry. I promised we'd spend at least _some_ time together."

"It's okay. I understand. Your work is important." _More important than me,_ Tony added that in his mind only and he shrugged.

"Kid..." Howard's gaze softened, having heard the unsaid words anyway. Before he could say more, they heard someone coming and he pulled out his gun.

"Whoa! Agent. It's just me."

"Mrs. Gibbs, I told you to stay hidden until I come and get you." Howard sighed and put away the gun, while the redheaded woman looked curiously at the two teenagers standing there.

"I've told you to call me Shannon. Who are these?"

"My family." Howard sighed again. It seemed like sighing was all he'd been doing these last couple of days. And he needed to get some real sleep, before he'd end up keeling over. "Let's all move to the living room for now."

"Howie... We only came to say goodbye," Tony spoke.

"Nonsense. You will join us for the dinner," Shannon said with a smile.

Both Howard and Tony were at a loss what to do, but it only took few more minutes and they all found themselves in the living room with a ten-year-old girl. _She must be Kelly_ , Tony mused and found himself under the intense stare of the little girl, much to the amusement of the others.

"I'm Shannon and this is my daughter Kelly."

"Tony."

"I'm Jeanne. Tony's girlfriend."

"Girlfriend? How old are you two?"

"Sixteen," Tony and Jeanne spoke at the same time.

"You sure don't look your age..." Shannon said, obviously talking about Tony as she studied the skinny boy sitting on her couch. "Don't take it the wrong way, but you must be one of the cutest things I have ever seen..."

Tony had a hard time not showing his annoyance. Jeanne held her hand over his hand on the couch, reassuringly. It worked and he relaxed almost immediately. Giving a grateful smile, he turned his face back toward the Gibbs family who seemed to be completely oblivious of the unsaid words shared between the two.

"Even my daughter agrees," Shannon kept talking, with a tantalizing smile on her face. "Don't you, sweetheart?" She grinned at the wide-eyed stare her baby girl was giving to her mom.

"Mom..." Kelly sounded embarrassed.

As Tony kept his eyes on his lap, Shannon suddenly got worried. "I hope I didn't upset you?"

Tony finally looked up and smiled dryly. "No... It's fine. I'm used to it."

"Oh, I hope you can forgive me. I spoke without thinking."

"Really. It's okay."

Shannon looked relieved and she smiled. "You are such a cutie though."

"Mom!" Kelly cried out.

This time it was Jeanne who spoke, "It's alright, Kelly. He is a cutie and he knows it."

"Jeanne... One more word and no more driving lessons," Tony threatened and Jeanne made a small show of zipping her mouth closed.

"Kelly, take care of our guests while I'll go and finish the dinner."

"Yes, mom..."

The moment Shannon left, awkward and long silence took over the room.

* * *

"...and this is where dad is with his friends," Kelly explained happily, while showing the two teenagers photos of her dad the Marine, Leroy Jethro Gibbs. Tony had snorted at the name, but Jeanne elbowing him in his side had silenced him into biting his lip, to keep himself from snickering.

Shannon was still in the kitchen and they could hear her humming a happy tune. Howard hadn't said a word and simply focused keeping his eyes and ears open for any kind of danger. Right now he was sitting next to the window and looking outside.

Kelly showed Jeanne and Tony few pictures of her and her dad together. There was not one unhappy picture there. Every single picture just screamed of love.

"He seems like a great father..." Tony finally spoke with a quiet voice, which made Jeanne look at him in concern, scolding herself for not realizing sooner how this was extremely sore subject to him.

"He's the best!" Kelly proclaimed with a big smile on her face.

Jeanne kept looking at Tony, until he finally met her eyes. Nodding slightly she let him know he could go. Smiling gratefully, Tony nodded his thanks and he stood up.

"Do you have more pictures?" Jeanne asked and Kelly was nodding enthusiastically.

Making his way to Howard, who hadn't relaxed the whole time they had been there, Tony leaned against the wall next to him. He finally voiced the one thing that had bothered him the most. Especially after Mike Frank's big talk about the importance of having someone watching your back. "Where's your partner?"

Howard was looking dead on his feet and it took him a few seconds too long to register what the question was. "Don't have one."

Tony frowned. "What the—?"

"Watch your language," Howard scolded absent-mindedly, while his hand kept making sure his gun was where it should be. Brushing his fingers over it and sometimes even taking it out for a few seconds, only to put it back. Then the cycle would begin again.

"Are you telling me that all this time you've been here alone? All by yourself?"

"What..? Yeah. Should be simple enough job for one man."

"I'm gonna kill him..!" Tony's raised voice got the attention of the girls for a moment, but Jeanne managed to turn it back on the photos. Lowering his voice, Tony hissed between his teeth, "Those big words about needing a partner, a backup... Howie... What if the bad guy shows up while you're passed out?"

Howard snorted. "Won't be passing out."

"Oh yeah? Then why do you look like you could fall asleep any minute now? When was the last time you slept? I'm not talking about closing your eyes for five minutes. Howie... If you end up dead because... I _can't_..."

The tight look on Howard's face melted into a soft smile and he ruffled the kid's hair affectionately. When Tony didn't even complain, he sighed, giving up. "Alright, kid. I'll talk to him. I'll call him. I promise."

"Not him. Talk to this... this Director of yours."

Howard rolled his eyes. "Alright. I will."

The two of them barely had a chance to share a smile when it happened. One moment they were smiling and then Tony saw Howard's eyes go wide; the man might have even made some noise, but Tony never heard it. All he saw was the dark red color, spreading fast around the wound. "Howie!" Tony screamed and try as he did, he couldn't hold up the weight of the tall and muscular man. Falling on the floor with Howard, he tried to stop the bleeding.

"Shot in the back... Went right through the left side..." Tony's dazed mumbling was stopped by the surprisingly strong grip on his arm. He looked down and he was only barely keeping it together when he saw the glassy look in Howard's eyes. Saw how the life was already fading. "No... Howie... Please..."

"Girls... Get them... safety..."

"I'm not leaving you!"

"Anthony!" Howard raised his voice with pure willpower, making Tony freeze. Howard never called him by the given name. Never. He swore to not do it.

"Tony..." Howard spoke again, but this time gently. He'd been shot not only once, but twice and his time was running out. He could feel it. Had he moved away in time, before the second bullet came, there was a big chance that Tony would be bleeding out next to him. He had no regrets, other than the pain this would bring to Tony and his father. He found himself sending out a little prayer for there to be someone to look after them for him. "Tell... Tell dad that... I'm sorry and... I love him..."

" _You_ tell him that!"

"Be safe... love you too... kid... Go!"

Tony looked up and only then did he realize the living room was looking like a battle field. Shannon had come from the kitchen and was now hiding behind the couch with crying Kelly in her arms and Jeanne was not too far from them. For a moment, the shooting had stopped.

Swallowing, Tony looked down again. "Howie?" His brother's eyes were open and Tony knew enough about dead people to know that he was gone. For a while Tony could only stare, frozen to the place. Then, feeling like he was in a dream, he leaned forward to kiss Howard's still warm forehead and closed the man's eyes. "I love you too, brother..."

Tony didn't even notice he was staggering when he stood up, but the sudden pain in his left shoulder when a bullet hit him, brought at least part of his mind back to reality. Distantly he was aware of someone shouting at him; screaming his name in terror. Jeanne.

"Tony! Get down!"

He dropped himself down on the floor and crawled to where the girls were. Jeanne cried when she reached over to help him, but Tony pulled away.

"You've been shot!"

"I'm fine... We need to get out of here... Who knows if the shooter comes inside before any help arrives..." Tony spoke in a monotone voice, having already distanced his mind from the situation. When he had been still living with his father, he learned the hard way how to separate himself from the pain. And now he was falling back into those old ways without even trying.

"But, Tony..."

"Hey, Jeanne... You remember your first driving lesson?"

Jeanne frowned. "Yes."

"I need you to drive."

"What?"

Tony glanced toward Shannon who was in a full mother lion mode, ready to defend her baby against anything and anyone. "Can't ask her to do it... And I'm... not feeling too good..." He was starting to slur his words.

"Tony..."

"Now."

Closing her eyes, she nodded. "Okay... I can do it."

Crawling closer to the other two, Tony felt dizziness starting to take over his head and for a moment the room tilted dangerously. "Mrs. Gibbs."

"Good heavens..." Shannon looked absolutely horrified, seeing for the first time the bleeding sight of the boy.

"We need to get out of here... With a car... We'll drive to the nearest place that has cops and guns... Or just _anything_..."

Shannon was about to say something, when he saw the look on the far too young face. It was like the mirror image of her husband, which both terrified her and eased her mind. Much later she would think how strange it was, to let a sixteen-year-old order her around and ease her mind just like that. A boy—who still had some of the softness of a child—shouldn't have such a calm and hardened look on his face.

It seemed that the shooter had finally left since the escape worked out perfectly, but had Tony been older, he would've known to be suspicious of just how perfectly it went.

After trying to call Mike Franks, they had realized that the phone lines had most likely been cut. No surprise there. When they made it outside the house, the whole neighborhood was like a death had run over it. It was so quiet and eerie, but regardless, they made it to the car in one piece. Shannon and Kelly took the backseat, while Jeanne went to the driver's seat and Tony took the passenger seat, knowing that if she'd need any help, it would be easier for him to be next to her.

By the time they made it to the big road and they were surrounded by other cars and people, they all relaxed, since surely the shooter wouldn't attack in a place like this.

Holding the pressure on the bullet wound, Tony found himself fighting against the need to close his eyes. Now was not the time. Not now. Later. _Much later_ , he kept telling himself. He was aware of the worried glances Jeanne kept throwing his way, despite his reassuring smiles. Letting out a deep sigh, Tony closed his eyes. He suddenly remembered what he had just lost. It felt surreal. He opened his eyes and turned to look at their nervous driver with no license to drive yet. "Jeanne."

Jeanne kept her eyes on the road. "Yeah?"

"I love you."

She smiled and just as she was about to say ' _I love you too_ ', a car appeared out of nowhere next to their car. Just like before, Tony saw it all happen like in a dream. A very bad dream. He barely had time to notice the gun when the bullet hit Jeanne, killing her on the spot—she never saw it coming—and splattering her blood on his face. In his mouth. He could taste it and it would be a memory that would forever make him want to vomit.

What happened next, Tony could later remember only bits and pieces from here and there. The car going off the road. The angry horns blaring at them. Screaming voices. _So much screaming_... He most likely also felt pain at some point, but that detail would always remain somewhat hazy, as if the pain wasn't his; mostly he felt disconnected. The world around them was spinning—or was it the car that was spinning them?—and then it all suddenly stopped. There was no movement, no sounds. Not thinking it might be a bad idea, Tony opened his seat belt. With clumsy movements it took few tries. At the back of his mind, he realized that the car must have flipped back on its wheels, because he didn't fall down when he was finally free. He didn't question it why there was no door on his side and he made it outside easily, or rather, he fell out.

Getting on his feet was a feat and after falling down many times, Tony wondered why he felt so strange. Part of him was even wondering where he was and what was happening. For all he knew, he could've been on the moon. That's how confused he was right then. Confused or not, something kept him moving. He didn't question it when the damaged car doors seemed to open so easily, or why carrying the unmoving bodies out didn't make him fall down, when just a moment ago even the smallest movement had been too much.

After he got them all out, Tony fell down on his knees. As the adrenaline left his body, he could suddenly hear again. People hurrying to the scene. Ambulance getting closer... Curling up next to the dead, the pain and bloodloss was finally too much and Tony was met with darkness.

* * *

The constant beeping noise was starting to get on his nerves. For a long time he had tried to tell someone to make it stop, or at least block his ears, but no words ever came out of his mouth. Not to mention being unable to move himself or open his eyes.

"Tony?"

Well, that was first; hearing someone talking to him. Fighting against the remaining drugs in his system, he finally managed to open his eyes. White. Everything was so white and bright that he had to close his eyes few times before he could keep them fully open. Next to his bed was an old man, Howard's dad, who looked relieved and older than ever. Tony stared at him confused and when he spoke it was with a painfully raspy voice, "What happened?"

"Tony... son..."

And then they hit him, the memories. All at once. It was too much. "No!" He didn't realize it, but he had started screaming hysterically, as much as his weak voice let him. He never heard people running in the room; never felt the hands keeping him steady as he was given something, which soon pushed him back into that deep coma like dream.

The next time Tony truly woke up, it was almost a week later. He didn't know he'd been waking up at least few more times in between and how each time he'd become hysterical enough for them to have to put him back to sleep, to make sure he didn't cause any of his wounds to reopen. He stared at the darkness above him. He didn't know why, but he felt drained, almost weightless. As if he wasn't even in his body. The door was silently opened and he turned his head to look at the stranger standing there.

"Oh my... I hope I didn't wake you, dear boy."

Tony just stared and a moment later there was a small amount of light in the room. The older man hesitated before he stepped forward and took the only chair in the room, sitting on it next to the bed. Normally Tony would have at least wished for this stranger to get lost, but right now he couldn't care less about anything.

"My name is Donald Mallard, but you may call me Ducky." Seeing as the boy did not plan on saying anything, Ducky smiled sadly. Although he had never met the boy before—not awake anyway—it broke his heart to see the deep depths of emptiness in such young eyes. Somehow it seemed so wrong. He had a feeling those eyes were supposed to be full of sparkling life and mischief of youth. In his mind he tried to picture what they would look like when filled with laughter.

"You do not know me, but I was the one who fixed you up. Seeing as the hospital had no free hands on that sorrowful day and it was a matter of life or death, an old doctor friend of mine asked for my help." Ducky chuckled at his next thought. "It has been a while since I have worked on a living body. I must say, I am pleased I did not have to end it with a dead body."

That got Tony's involuntary attention and he looked at the man, truly looked this time and there even was a small spark of interest in his eyes, but it was faint. Much to Ducky's joy, the old man saw it, though he pretended to not notice.

"You see, I work for the NIS; I am their Medical Examiner. Perhaps you have even heard of me?" Ducky saw the boy's mouth move slightly, but the spoken words were so quiet he could not hear anything, until he leaned closer.

"Thought you're some shrink... Instead I was under the mercy of someone who... works on dead people."

Ducky chuckled. "That is precise, my boy. But worry not, I did perfectly good job on you, even if I say so myself."

Tony turned his face away from Ducky again and stared at the ceiling instead.

"Anthony..."

"Tony... It's what people call me."

"I think your name is splendid. Too nice to not use."

"Whatever... Don't care... I'm not going to kill myself or anything... You can go now."

Ducky frowned slightly. "I do admit that was one of my concerns."

"Already went down that road once... Promised to the people who saved me to never do it again."

"That's good to know, Anthony."

"Where's my uncle?"

Ducky was quiet for a moment. "Today was the funeral."

"Funeral? Whose— Oh..."

"No one could be sure when you would get out of the hospital so they could not wait. Certainly not when you kept reopening your wounds."

"Look... Doctor Mallard..."

"Ducky."

"Ducky. Let's be straight here, to save both of our times... I lost two very dear people to me. Jeanne's father must hate my guts right now... And the Gibbs girls..." Tony frowned. He didn't even know what happened to them. No one had told him, or if they had, he'd been too out of it. "Are they..?"

"They are alive. You saved them from a certain death. Twice. The doctors said it and the agents investigating the whole incident said it."

'Incident'. How little a word like that could even begin to describe what happened. Tony wondered if that's what they would say on the news. Would it even make it on the news? If it did, would the world even know the truth? Would they know just how horrific that 'incident' truly was and how wonderful people Howard and Jeanne were? Or would they be sidelined by some federal BS? "I can hear the _but_ coming."

"They have not woken up yet. Anthony..."

Tony turned his head away and closed his eyes. "I'm tired. Could we please not do this now?"

"Certainly. I apologize."

"Just go..."

Ducky stood up, but before he left he spoke once more, "If you need to talk to someone, I am more than willing to help."

When he was alone again, Tony felt tears in his eyes, but he wouldn't let them come out. He couldn't let it happen or all he would do was cry again. This time his pain was quiet. Defeated.

* * *

Sitting behind the table, Tony couldn't help but feel like a criminal, despite the fact that he was here only to give his statement. As a _victim_. The Agent doing the interview was Howard's partner, the probie of the team; a man who didn't seem to be having any kind of compassion in him.

"So how did Howie react?"

Tony's eyes narrowed at the use of the nickname, reserved for _his_ use only. His brother had even refused to speak to his own father when the man had jokingly used it one time. To make the things worse, this Agent seemed to be using it mockingly. It felt almost like the Agent was trying to break him. For what? He wouldn't know.

Relaxing his posture on the chair, Tony hid a yawn behind his hand, which he didn't even have to fake. "I'm pretty sure we already went over that part. Don't you know how to write down notes? Or did they not teach you how to do it? Is it meant for only those who graduate from probie to Agent?"

The probie frowned and then blushed, from both anger and embarrassment, knowing that there were people watching them behind the 'mirror'.

"So could we get to the real business now..." Tony said, throwing the man a glare, which sent chills all the way in the Agent's bones, because it was almost like looking at... "Are you alright? You look like you've seen a ghost?"

The man turned around and _fled_ from the room. A ghost indeed. He had looked his dead partner in the eyes. While it wasn't as strong as Howard's—being worn by such a childish and innocent looking face—it was enough of a reminder. As if Howard himself had sent a warning from his grave.

Tony kept the look on his face neutral once the man was gone. _That was for you, Howie_.

* * *

Mike Franks walked without any idea where he was heading. As long as he didn't end up alone with that kid, he didn't care. He had avoided seeing Tony even with other people around, since it was always there; those green eyes, silently accusing him for what had happened. His own feelings of guilt didn't make things any easier.

Stopping, Mike realized too late that he'd been cornered by the one person he'd been avoiding.

Tony's eyes weren't just accusing, Mike could almost swear they were on fire; green burning blaze that had to be consuming the kid himself from the inside. Although Tony was much shorter and just a kid, Mike found himself taking steps back to avoid being too close. Perhaps his own feelings of guilt were playing tricks to his mind.

"Don't you even have a conscience?" Tony finally spoke and Mike did all he could to not flinch or show any kind of reaction. "How can you even look yourself in the mirror?!"

Mike found it practically impossible to face that deathly glare and he didn't even know how he did it, but he didn't turn his eyes away. "Look... Kid. What's happened, happened. Looking like you want to kill me, won't bring them back."

That only served to make Tony even angrier. "You let _your_ Agent be there with _no_ backup! _Because_ of that, two people got killed! You can't just walk away from it and put all the blame on the bad guy! You share the blame!"

At that point Mike hardened himself as he finally was the one to take a step closer. "Are you not barking at the wrong tree here now, kid?" And because he had experience with survivors of various crimes, he was pretty sure this kid had it too. The survivor's guilt. He would never know why, but he didn't feel guilty for using that knowledge against the boy. " _You_ share the blame, Tony..." Ah. There it was. The flash of shame in those eyes of his. Good. "Go home, kid. There is nothing for you in here anymore."

Mike didn't need to look back as he walked away. He knew what kind of look there would be on the kid's face. In some twisted way, he felt satisfaction.

* * *

Standing outside the now fixed house, Tony stared at the door. He had tried to take a cab, but just like few times before, from the moment he sat on the passenger seat, he had gone into full panic mode, which ended up with him pretty much being kicked out of the car. So he had walked. Ducky was going to have his head, since he was still supposed to be taking it easy.

After a few half tantrums and at least twice as many times where he completely ignored the man, Tony had sort of started liking Ducky. Or maybe it was the way the man could tell him a story after a story, without seemingly ever getting tired of it. It also gave something else to think about. Ducky had also kept him informed how the Gibbs family was doing. Kelly had started showing signs of waking up and even Shannon had woken up couple of times, although she hadn't been aware of her surroundings yet. So all in all everything seemed to be going well for the Gibbses, which was also the only reason Tony felt now brave enough to face the infamous Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

Walking to the door, Tony first knocked and then rang the doorbell. He frowned when he got no answer. Seeing as the door wasn't locked, he stepped inside the house. For a moment he had to close his eyes when the flashbacks started attacking him with full force. It was so intense it made him want to throw up when he refused to leave the house.

"Hello? Mr. Gibbs?" He was surprised by how steady his voice sounded like, even if it was just a little wary. It seemed no one was home so he turned around to leave, when he heard a sound. Taking a deep and nervous breath, Tony went toward the basement.

The room was full of some broken pieces of wood and small pieces of broken glass. Sitting against a wall was a man, whom Tony recognized only after having seen all those photos Kelly had been showing them. The man looked furious and taking a few steps closer, Tony stopped to stare with wide eyes when he saw that the man was holding a gun in his hands. But the worst part was the horrible smell of alcohol, which he could smell without getting any closer. It brought too many unwanted childhood memories and he almost turned around and fled.

Taking a deep and shaky breath, Tony willed himself to remain there. "Mr. Gibbs?"

Gibbs looked up and slurred, yet still sounding shockingly sober for someone so obviously drunk, "Who're you? Duck send you?"

"What? No, he didn't. I'm here because... I'm sorry about what happened to your wife and daughter." To Tony his words sounded clumsy and wrong.

"What you want?" Gibbs snarled.

"I... I'm the one who... I mean... I was in that car with them..."

Gibbs stood up so suddenly it startled Tony. "What?"

"I... I was with them, when..."

"I'll kill you!" the man yelled. Completely fueled with unlimited rage. "It's all your fault!"

Tony froze, but not because of the words, although they had cut him deep. It was because of the gun that was now pointed at him. In a very short amount of time he went through different emotions. First there was confusion. Then he felt the kind of fear he hadn't felt since the last time he saw his father. Then the fear became relief; he could just let this happen. He could let the man kill him and both would be happy. The man would get outlet for his anger and he would get relief of... living.

He didn't know why he did it, but a split second before the gun went off, Tony jumped away, the bullet barely missing him. Crashing in the middle of the pieces of wood, he let out anguished sob when at least one of his wounds opened again. So much for being careful.

"You made them get in that car! You hurt them! You did it!"

Standing up, Tony finally fled the basement and then the house. After this, he didn't think he could ever come back again. He had barely made it two steps outside, when he ran into someone.

"Anthony, my dear boy. What happened?" Ducky was concerned.

Tony let out a sob. "I want to go home... But I bet uncle won't want me around now that I killed his son."

"Good heavens, child, what are you talking about? You _did not_ kill anyone. Now, tell me, what happened? Did Jethro say something?" Ducky took in the shaking form, then the wide-eyed look on Tony's face.

"He... said and... Shot me... Tried to kill..."

"Jethro did what?" The look on Ducky's face became grim.

"Ducky... Take me away from here, please... I don't want to be here when he finds me..."

"Calm down. I will not let anything happen to you."

However Tony was far too gone by then and his mix of fear and panic jumped into a whole new level. "Anthony!" Ducky took hold of Tony when his eyes suddenly rolled back and he went completely lax. Ducky then noticed Tony's shirt was turning red. Not wasting any time, he took the boy in his car and drove toward the nearest hospital.

"Oh, Jethro. How you disappoint me... What am I going to do with you?" Ducky sighed, deciding then that the two of them were going to have a serious talk, which would not end up too well. He didn't know that Tony would stop him from mentioning anything to Gibbs. Didn't know that this new friend of his would keep disappearing from his life, for a long time periods; growing up to be a man who was always on the run, unable to form many strong and lasting relationships.

Meanwhile, Gibbs had finally passed out. The next time he woke up, he had no memory of the day before. Neither did he remember his young guest. Only the remaining fumes of alcohol, the smell of his own vomit and the destruction in the basement reminded him of how he had spent the previous day. For a long time though he tried to solve a mystery; why was Ducky so mad at him?


	11. No Pain, No Fun

It was a strange thing to look at. At least if you knew those two men at all. The older one of the two had strangely lost look in his icy blue eyes; he obviously was out of his usual comfort zone. The younger man was wide-eyed and looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Having been mostly focused doing his job and nothing else, Tony hadn't expected something like this to happen. However, to his credit, it took less than a moment for him to gather himself together and put back the mask on his face.

"I remember you," Gibbs said again.

"So I heard the first time you said it," Tony answered and when he was trying to pull his arm free again, Gibbs finally let him, but his eyes never let Tony out of his sight.

"Shannon and I... We knew for sure... We thought you're dead. _I_ thought you're dead." It wasn't often that Gibbs found himself completely at a loss of words.

"So you saw my body then?"

"I heard about you from Shannon, but I didn't know that I... I didn't remember our meeting."

Tony bit his tongue, to keep himself from saying a few chosen words about said 'meeting'. Instead he chuckled. "Yeah. I figured that much when Ducky told me you had no memory of that day, which was rather convenient for you by the way; to be able to forget and just move on with your life like nothing happened."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"That we already knew each other. Don't play games with me, DiNozzo. You know what I mean."

Tony laughed humorlessly. "I wouldn't call it exactly _knowing each other_ ; you almost killed me." He tapped at his forehead with his finger. "Or was it my heart you were aiming at or some other place? To be honest, my memories from that moment are hazy. And just when I am finally starting to move on with my life, of course you have to remember and decide to rip open the old wounds I've spend the last ten years trying to heal."

Gibbs closed his eyes for a second. The memory wasn't that vivid for him either, but it didn't mean he wanted to recall it more than he already had. "That's enough."

"What? Oh, right. Sorry. I forgot. You did have a _real_ reason to kill me, right? It's my fault your precious family got nearly killed."

Gibbs clenched his teeth, but not because he agreed. He felt guilty and then thinking if he would have indeed ended up killing Tony... He had another flashback of the look on the boy's face from back then, and he felt sick. The sound of a gun safety going off got his attention. Gibbs might have thought for a moment that he would end up with a bullet hole, and he couldn't have blamed DiNozzo for doing it either. Instead, the gun was being held for him to take.

There was a smirk on Tony's face and his eyes looked dark. "Why don't you give it a try now that you're sober enough to hit the target? I promise to not move this time."

"DiNozzo..."

"Go on. It'll only hurt once and I'm sure you could make it look like I did it to myself. It's not like too many would care to investigate it too deeply either. Just another cop who couldn't do the job anymore and had nothing else to live for so he decided to take the easy way out."

"DiNozzo!"

"And then we can all be happy and move on. You'll have your revenge and it's not like _I_ lost anything back then. It must be my fault someone was after your girls. I've been told that trouble follows me wherever I go."

The painfully loud sound, when the strong Marine hand hit the back of the younger man's head, made Gibbs cringe and Tony almost lose his balance.

Letting out a loud and long string of curses, Tony reacted fast. The fist didn't miss its target and they both froze for a moment. "Oh no..." Tony stared at the flow of blood, which Gibbs was now trying to stop.

* * *

"Thank you." Tony accepted the first-aid kit from the young waitress and put it down on the small table between them, almost knocking over the two cups of their untouched coffee.

Holding his nose and trying to not bleed all over the table, Gibbs was glaring at the ceiling. One might think it was because of his broken nose, but it had more to do with the fact that there was perfectly made coffee right at his reach, but he couldn't really drink it now. Without even tasting it, he could tell it was just the way he liked it. The knowledge didn't improve his dark mood. They hadn't thought it through when ordering him coffee.

"I really think you should go to a hospital or at least let Ducky look at it." The even stronger glare made Tony shake his head and he took a first proper look at the nose. "Wow. I swear, I've never... Well, not lately anyway. Trust me; you need to show it to a doctor or you'll end up with a crooked nose. What would your wife think? Unless you're going for a whole new look. I guess it could scare some people off, even before you look at them."

Gibbs grunted and pointed at his nose with his free hand. To his dismay he ended up knocking over his cup of coffee. Closing his eyes for a moment, to remain calm, he counted to ten as he listened to the dripping sound of coffee hitting the floor. Actually, better make it twenty.

Hiding his smirk, Tony glanced toward the waitress rushing to clean up the mess. "See? We need to get to the hospital so your nose can be fixed before more damage is done."

After ordering another coffee to come with them, they sat there silently waiting for it, while Tony finished drinking his own coffee.

"In my defense, you hit me first," Tony said after a while. Gibbs answered, but it was hard to understand at first. When he did, Tony scowled. "What do you mean I was asking for it? Maybe I'll just leave you here on your own to call for someone to get you. I'd like to see how you would deal with that. I bet you don't even know how to text."

Gibbs didn't say anything, instead he kept staring at the ceiling. Thinking and... just thinking. It was pretty much all he could do right now. Besides, after doing it once, he couldn't fool the young Detective to drop down the guard too soon for another head slap. Part of him knew that he had to apologize for what he had done all those years ago; knowing what Tony had lost on that day, made it so much worse. At the same time Gibbs knew that just simply giving his usual one worded and rare apology would not be enough. Not this time. But he wasn't a man of big and fancy words and he wasn't big on showing it through his actions either.

"I'm not saying you didn't deserve to get your nose broken, but I am still sorry for doing it though," Tony spoke, while he was checking the the nose again. After making sure the bleeding wasn't that bad anymore, he did as much treatment on it as he could, before the coffee came. "My hand just... had a will of its own."

Gibbs glared, and touched his now 'plugged' nose. At least he could now try to drink his coffee, even if he couldn't enjoy it as he normally would. Gibbs hesitated for a moment before reaching out his hand and he squeezed the back of Tony's neck gently. He didn't know if his unsaid apology was understood and the younger man never let him know if that was the case.

"Well, that was a lame imitation of a head slap," Tony finally said, having frozen for a moment.

* * *

Waiting in the hospital, Tony was relieved to finally see a familiar face among the many strangers.

"How is he?"

"They're fixing up his nose; that's all I know for now. He didn't look too happy, but it's nothing life threatening. It may be painful, but it won't kill him."

"Fixing up his nose?" Ducky was confused and then he relaxed. The short phone call had worried him more than needed. ' _We're in a hospital_ ' was not exactly the wisest thing to say without adding that it's not anything life threatening. "Oh dear... What happened?"

"My fist spoke," Tony answered and seeing the look Ducky gave him, he shrugged. "I promise to have a word with it later."

Ducky chuckled and then he became more serious. "What did he do?"

"He remembered."

"Oh?" Ducky furrowed his brows, before finally understanding what the young man had meant by that. "Oh my... And how did it go?"

"Not well as you can imagine."

"Well, if I may say so, I think it's better for both of you that the secret is finally out."

"I'd rather have him remain ignorant for the rest of his life than this. That I could have been able to deal with and it was what I had come to accept years ago. He has no right to do this to me now."

"Anthony, my dear boy. Please do not lie to me. I may be old, but I'm not stupid. I have been around you both long enough to know that this whole thing has been eating at you. Although Jethro never could understand what that something was and I may have not made things too easy for him either..."

Tony closed his eyes and brushed a hand over his head. "I don't know what I should be doing now. It's not like I ever prepared myself for this."

"Talk to him." Seeing the ridiculous look, Ducky chuckled. "I am quite certain you can handle it, if you can handle the mafia boss, which you took down."

"I haven't..."

"I also have friends in high places. Just because that boss of yours took all credit and tried to cover up that he did so, too many people know who it was that went undercover for months and did what the FBI or any other alphabet out there couldn't do." The smile fell as the older man became serious again. "I must admit I did not like hearing you had no one to watch your back, or your six as Jethro would put it."

"You worry too much, Ducky. You sound almost like... It's Frost, isn't it? The one you've been talking to. Please, don't tell me _you're_ also one of his friends."

"Actually, he and I went to the same school a long time ago. You would not believe all the stories I could tell."

Tony shuddered. He believed just fine. "Of course you did... I'd say this is a small world, but instead I'd rather you just tell me that Gibbs isn't one of those friends of his."

"I can assure you, that is not the case."

"Well, that makes everything _so_ much better."

"He has not shared too much with me, Anthony. I apologize if I made you think that. He cares too much to be doing that, even when his closest friends ask for it. With deep regret I must admit that I may have tried to make him slip a thing or two sometimes, just to know how you are doing."

Tony leaned against the wall, with a deep sigh escaping from the depths of his soul, as if it pained him. "I'm sorry, Ducky. Here you are, only trying to look out for not just me, but everyone you care about and all I can do is keep snapping at you."

Ducky laid his hand over his young friend's shoulder and smiled gently. "That's quite alright, my dear boy. I do understand. Believe it or not, but I have done my share of snapping at people, as you put it. In fact, I prefer you do that and not what you have done so far, which is keeping it all hidden inside you. That kind of thing never ends well."

"What if he still blames me, Ducky? I mean, how can he not, when others did? I might be worst of them all, when it comes to blaming me."

"I am sure that's not the case."

"What if you're wrong? How can I possibly keep working with him? What happens when I turn my back on him? Will he really shoot me this time? Or would he let me get in a dangerous situation without watching my back? Frankly, at this point I'd much rather take my boss back in Baltimore. At least with Bolton I know what to expect."

Ducky wanted to deny it, but he had to admit that he did not know what thoughts were going through his old friend's mind right now. Could he with all honesty say Jethro would keep things at least professional if nothing else? After knowing how obsessed Jethro had become, so focused hunting down the people who almost took his family from him. And all the other times in the past when he had gone mad, until he got any other people who had harmed or even tried to harm his people.

Knowing his silence said more than anything he could have said, but not wanting to leave his young friend without just the silence and unsaid words, Ducky wrapped his arm around the young man from the side and hugged him gently. Feeling strangely like a great-uncle or a grandfather hugging his own offspring, he secretly hoped the boy could one day let him close enough, to truly let him be a part of his life and to finally stop running. The poor boy needed someone to look after him. Even if it was just nagging over the food he ate and scraped knees after he had done something stupid.

Tony sighed and let his head fall forward, hiding his emotions from anyone who might see a glimpse of his face. It was where and how Gibbs found the two of them later.


	12. Make My Day, See If You're Lucky

Tony sighed as he stopped his car next to Gibbs' car. "I already told you I'm sorry; you can stop glaring at me." It had taken some time until Ducky had finally agreed that they could be left alone, without his watchful eyes, and he had gone back to his own work. So now here they were, both men unwilling to compromise and just wanting to have it their way.

"Stop apologizing. It's a sign of weakness."

"What did you just say?"

"We need to talk."

"Look, Gibbs... If it helps, I can do the talking with the people today." Tony didn't want to talk with Gibbs. He wasn't going to do it. He wasn't going to let the bastard keep opening those old wounds, which he had spent years trying to heal, or hide. So he was going to do his very best and play his ghost games. For a moment his mind took him back in time and to where his 'game' first began; he saw himself running through the dark and empty hallways, spending all his free time finding 'safe' hiding places and new ways to make himself invisible.

"DiNozzo."

"You know what this reminds me of?"

"The reason you can't sit in a car if you're not driving it, is it because..?"

Tony narrowed his eyes, giving off dangerous aura. It startled Gibbs and he had the urge to look away, but he fought it and held the gaze, wondering what had given the kid such 'skill'. It was rivaling his own infamous glare, which had taken years for him to make perfect. It took more than natural talent and one didn't get there without staining his soul one way or another; either by his own actions or someone else's. Maybe both. Once again, Gibbs found himself wondering, and even worrying, since the Detective was only barely old enough to be called a man.

"We are _not_ going there, Agent Gibbs," Tony finally said warningly. However, Gibbs wouldn't be Gibbs if he gave up that easily.

"I want to know what happened."

"Why don't you ask your wife? She was there."

"She doesn't remember everything too clearly."

"Well, good for her." Tony chuckled darkly and with bitterness. He still remembered how it felt to be covered in blood of the people he loved. How it had tasted when some of Jeanne's blood ended up in his mouth. How they looked like. He had another flash of memory from further down in the past; the cold body of his mother and the eyes without life, which kept staring at him. He would never forget any of those deaths. "Good for her..." he mumbled quietly to himself.

"She remembers enough though and she's been blaming herself. She still thinks you're dead."

Tony narrowed his eyes again. He had a bad feeling. He knew for a fact that the one responsible was never caught and—according to Ducky—how Gibbs had behaved like a madman sometimes, trying to catch that person.

"I want to know, what you know about—"

"No."

"Those people are still out there. Don't you want to have people like that off the streets? Who else are they going to end up killing, while they are still out there, free?"

"Out. Get out of my car," Tony snarled between his teeth.

"I want the truth!

" _You can't handle the truth_!"

Gibbs closed his mouth, staring at Tony.

"Come on? Don't tell me you haven't seen it? _A few good men_ , the movie? Jack Nicholson? Oh, Gibbs... You truly disappoint me."

"DiNozzo. As I was saying..."

"Anyone ever tell you, you are kind of like Captain Ahab? You know, from Moby Dick; _I don't give reasons. I give orders._ And he's _so_ obsessed with that _stupid_ whale. I must get you both the movie and book since you don't seem like much of a movies person."

"DiNozzo..."

"Do I have to repeat myself, Agent Gibbs? Get out. Of my. Car!" Taking out his weapon, and taking off the safety for the effect, Tony pointed it at the older man. " _Go ahead, make my day_. See if you get lucky."

"DiNo—"

"Leave, before I break your nose again. I don't care how full of revenge you are; you'll get nothing out of me. Now, go to your car. We'll finish this case and then I will go back home. I have enough troubles back in Baltimore, without you dragging in your mess."

Gibbs looked desperate. It was pure torture. He knew that the information he needed could be inside that head; possibly the last piece of puzzle, which he'd been looking for, and he didn't seem to have any way of getting it. In a very not Gibbs like manner, he quietly got out of the car. Glancing toward the car once more, he barely got one last look of the Detective when the man sped away.

* * *

By the time they both had made it to the victim's ex-wife's apartment, both men had been given plenty of time to think. Not looking at Gibbs, Tony rang the doorbell and then again when no one was opening the door.

"She's not home yet."

"Excuse me?" Tony looked at the old lady staring at them from her doorway. She was holding a cat, who hissed at them. Another cat was peeking behind the door.

"The woman who lives in there. She's still at work. She'll be home soon though, unless she's late again."

"Thank you." Tony flashed his most charming smile, but the woman had already slammed her door closed.

"Losing your charm?" Gibbs chuckled.

"Nope. Just a small bump on the road."

For a moment they stood there silently, both awkwardly avoiding looking at the other man. Finally, Tony sighed as he gave up and decided to be the one to break the ice. Brushing his fingers through his unruly hair, he looked Gibbs in the eyes. "Listen, Gibbs. I'm sorr— I kind of lost my cool in there. I was wrong. I know better than to let myself lose control over my emotions like that. Especially during a case. I should have handled it better."

"I'm sure I deserved all of it."

There was amusement in Tony's eyes when he spoke, "Even the gun?"

"Especially the gun," Gibbs acknowledged quietly and all amusement was wiped clean from Tony's face and Gibbs feared he had said something wrong again.

Tony hesitated for a moment. Was he really going to do this now? "I noticed on our way here a place where we could sit down and drink some coffee. Maybe we could... You know. Sit down and... talk?"

Gibbs nodded and he felt confused when he didn't feel happy for getting what he had wanted after all. What was wrong with him? He should be jumping with joy. Celebrating his victory. Instead he felt like a man who had kicked a puppy on the ground; a puppy who wasn't trying to bite him anymore, when he had every good reason to do so, and instead he was now looking at him with wary and sad eyes.

Once they were both sitting on those less than comfortable plastic chairs, Tony stared at his cup of cheap coffee. "How much do you want to know?"

_Everything_ , Gibbs wanted to say. "As much as you are willing to share with me. And I'm..." Gibbs had a really hard time getting those words out of his mouth. He didn't apologize. "I'm sorry. The way I behaved..."

"Don't apologize. It's a sign of weakness," Tony answered cheekily and for a moment he thought he saw amusement in the man's eyes. He figured it was just his imagination. Somehow he had gotten the image that Agent Gibbs didn't do fun. Getting more serious, Tony played with his Detective badge, hiding his amusement how after seeing it, couple of new clients did a complete U-turn at the door and left faster than they had come in.

Tony sighed. There was no easy way to begin this, no right words. "I remember enough. Even how long it took for Jeanne's first drop of blood to hit my face... I won't repeat this offer. I've prepared myself to go through the nastiest moments and details, so ask me now or never go there again."

Gibbs was silent for a moment. "Was it... The one who shot from the other car, was it Pedro Hernandez?" He realized only then that maybe Tony didn't even know the name, even if he knew the face.

There was a flash of memory in Tony's mind. It was just a moment before Jeanne was shot. A car had showed out of nowhere next to theirs; there was a gun, but before that there had been a face behind the gun, which he hadn't noticed then, but would now remember rest of his life. "Yes."


	13. Hotline

Tony hadn't been holding any punches when he told almost everything he could remember from that fateful day and then some more; all the gory details, without painting any pretty pictures. If he was willing to be entirely honest with himself, he would know that a small part of him had wanted to hurt Gibbs by giving way more than he had to. And then he would also be ashamed. Petty revenge wasn't his style. He might behave like a big child sometimes, but never outright childish, unless he was putting on one of his performances and that was usually when people couldn't tell the difference between the two anyway.

Not long after Tony had finished telling his little tale, they'd seen the ex-wife coming home and they never got the chance to get into heart to heart discussion about it.

Glancing toward the man sitting next to him, Tony worried that perhaps this was too much and too soon. He had known the man might not take it well, but this wasn't the reaction he had expected either. Had he known, he wouldn't have opened his mouth at all. Even the woman sitting across them was starting to notice something was wrong. While Gibbs kept the look on his face impassive and he let Tony do the talking, he couldn't hide the fire in his eyes, not that he was even trying.

Tony sighed inwardly and cursed in his mind when Gibbs slammed his cup of coffee a little too hard on the small table between them, startling the woman. She had slightly fearful look on her face and seeing that, Tony found his own temper raising again and he fought to keep it concealed.

He had asked the old man whether he was up to this now, before they even came to see the woman. He'd _asked_ if he was able to go through with this now and even offered to let the man go blow off some steam if needed. Gibbs had simply shrugged it all off with a grunt of promise that he'd be able to deal with it. No problemo. He was the man; the big bad NCIS Agent who solved cases like it was nothing. Or so the rumors claimed.

Tony glared at the Agent who was holding the cup of coffee again with a trembling hand. Was there no limit to the man's temper and no ability to restrain it at least? Maybe he was asking too much. It wasn't like he could expect everyone to be able to hide their emotions, let alone become someone else as he could. To him it was just as natural as breathing. However, enough was enough.

"Could you wait for a moment, ma'am?" Tony smiled charmingly and the woman relaxed immediately, nodding. Gibbs grunted and then glared when Tony took the coffee from his hands. Then with a surprising strength, he dragged the older man outside the apartment.

"What—"

"What was that?" Tony finally snapped. Strangely, even in his angry state the anger seemed controlled. He kept his voice low, barely above a whisper. "I've heard of your infamous bad temper, but this is neither the time nor a place to show it off. Had I known you would react this way, I would have never told you anything. I asked you many times if you were up to this."

"DiNozzo..." There was a warning tone in the older man's voice. He flinched when Tony slammed his fist against the wall, which made an awful sound. The fist, not the wall. Tony didn't even notice the pain, or the fact that it was the same hand he had managed to cut on the piece of glass back at home.

"This is what you are going to do now, _Agent_ ," Tony seethed, ignoring the scowl. "You'll get out of here. I don't care what you need to do, but find a way to calm down. If I'm done here before that, I'll let you know. I can't deal with you right now. Hopefully the poor woman will trust me enough to perhaps give us some lead that can help us crack the case. The sooner it's done, the faster I can go home so I don't have to deal with you and your way of scaring everyone around you into submission. I'm not one of them."

After Tony left him standing there in a stunned silence, Gibbs shook his head with a sigh. True, he had messed up by allowing his temper to get in the way, but surely he could have finished this thing just fine. It wasn't like he'd been yelling or hurting anyone. He just couldn't help the anger and hatred he felt when it had something to do with people he cared about and their safety. He could barely hold himself from storming away with his sniper mode on. So if he showed off bit of his infamous death glare, what was the big deal? No harm done, right?

Snorting slightly, Gibbs turned around, hardly believing that he was actually listening to someone for a change; someone other than the women in his life. Well, them and Ducky. He was actually letting this, green behind his ears, kid order him around. If he was willing to admit, he _might_ have even felt guilty and embarrassed. Maybe.

Back inside, Tony was sitting on the chair again, smiling, as he got back to work. "I apologize. He has a bad day. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again. Where were we?"

The woman stared at him with wide eyes. "Your hand..."

Frowning, Tony looked down and flinched, noticing for the first time his hurt hand and the pain that came with it. He tried to shrug it off with a smile. "It looks worse than it is."

"Nonsense. I am a nurse, you know." The woman gave him a look of unbelief and she stood up. Tony found himself speechless. Doctors and nurses. There was a reason he wasn't fond of their company... A moment later she came back with a first aid kit and soon enough the hand was nicely fixed up. A little too nicely.

"You should still go to a hospital. Something could be broken." She kept looking at his hand worriedly.

"It's nothing. I've had worse." Tony smiled wryly. This day was really not going well... The woman frowned at the nonchalant statement, but before she could take charge of the situation again, Tony decided to remind her why he was there in the first place. "Thank you. Anyway, so you were saying you are the mother of his child?"

* * *

"The brat pretty much kicked me out and might've just as well made me stand in the corner like some misbehaving school boy," Gibbs muttered, wiping a hand over his face, flinching when he touched his nose. He hoped his voice didn't sound too bad. At least he hadn't been yet told to repeat anything he'd said so far... He heard laughter on the other end of the phone. "I'm glad to know you are enjoying this, Duck," Gibbs spat out.

_"Jethro. I have a feeling you are not telling me the whole story. Perhaps something that gave the young man every right to do this."_ Gibbs' silence was loud and Ducky sighed. _"What did you do?"_

"I may have not been as professional as I should have, when we went to interview the victim's ex-wife," Gibbs reluctantly admitted. "I may have scared her."

_"Jethro..."_ Ducky's voice sounded like his, when he was about to scold Kelly after she'd done something wrong. Thinking about his daughter brought the anger back and Gibbs found the urge to break something. Perhaps DiNozzo had been right to not let him stay.

"I just... Ducky, I hurt him. I hurt him bad and for so long I didn't even know it. He was just a kid. He still is just a kid who has a life waiting for him. Why waste it in a world like ours?"

_"I certainly hope you have not said those words to Anthony."_

Gibbs frowned. "Why not?"

There was a clear hesitation in Ducky's voice when he finally answered, _"I believe our Anthony couldn't have come up with a better career choice. He was made for this. The good and the bad. Or perhaps his life groomed him for this. Either way, Jethro, do take my word on this and be careful with your words and actions around him. Especially while you two still get to know each other."_

Since when had the Detective become 'their Anthony'? Gibbs chuckled bitterly at his next words. "I'm just so... angry. _Furious_. He told me everything, just like I wanted. I should be happy. Instead I feel like... He told me everything, Ducky. Not holding anything back. Just like I wanted."

_"Jethro..."_

"He even told about our first meeting, which you never told me about, so we'll talk about that later... I almost wish I could go back to not remembering. That look on his face... It feels like it's now been imprinted into my memory for good. I'm not that guy who hurts kids. At least I didn't think I am." As if hearing a command, the memory of the wide green eyes and the sound of a gun going off flashed through his head again. Only this time the bullet didn't miss and all Gibbs saw was red blood and empty eyes staring back at him with accusation, ' _How could you do this?'_

_"Good,"_ Ducky's answer shocked Gibbs and certainly did not lessen his self-hatred. He was glad the other man wasn't there to see the pained look on his face; the clenching of his fist.

"If it had been Kelly and some drunk bastard trying to kill her, I couldn't wait to find the bastard and put the bullet through _his_ sorry head. She _was_ almost killed by a madman and my girls were saved by the very same kid _I_ almost killed. I don't know how I could ever face his parents if I'll ever meet them."

Ducky snorted. _"You don't have to worry about that."_

"What?" Gibbs frowned, but Ducky didn't answer. Even more secrets, which nobody would tell him about. It was maddening. Despite the state of mind, which the previous secrets had put him in, Gibbs wanted to know.

_"Jethro. I am afraid work is calling. For a change, try to behave. Although, I am happy to know you have met someone who does not hesitate to put you in your place."_

"Ducky, wait. Don't—" _Don't hang up._ Gibbs sighed and he looked around the coffeehouse. There were only few other people besides him and they didn't seem to be paying him any attention. He looked up when a shadow landed on him. He didn't even try to wonder how the man had found him.

There was almost meek look on Tony's face as he stood there wondering just what he could say to the angry bear who seemed calm for now, but he didn't feel like putting his faith on that.

"DiNozzo." Gibbs nodded curtly and kept the look on his face carefully blank. Inwardly he frowned when the Detective relaxed immediately and even smiled.

Tony sat down. "So... The lady couldn't really give us anything useful. She was nice enough though, but let's never go there again, please. I barely made it out there in one piece."

Gibbs looked alarmed. "What?"

"Relax. You really need to tone it down for a bit, Agent... She's a nurse and she got into this major doctor mode, because I went slapping on the wall. She seriously overreacted and I swear she would've turned me into a mummy had I remained there any longer. I had to put all my best acting skills to use, just so I could escape." Tony shook his head, but strangely he also looked proud. As if escaping a nurse was just as bad situation as escaping a criminal trying to kill him.

Gibbs snorted wryly. "Well since she's a nurse, I think I'll take her word over yours. If she decided you needed some medical help, then that's what you most likely needed." He glanced toward the hand, which Tony was trying to hide. "Maybe we should take another trip to the hospital."

"No. We don't. I didn't break anything. Anyway, as I was saying, she didn't have anything useful for us."

Gibbs sighed. Most likely at least some of it had been his fault. During this whole time his mind hadn't really been on the case. Not that he was about to admit that to anyone.  "Alright then. Let's go back to the parents, and the wife."

"But she—"

"DiNozzo, I don't enjoy it either, but I'm sure you can suck it up and deal with it for now."

Tony held his peace. Now wasn't the time to bite off any heads. "She didn't have anything for us, but her ex did." Taking out a small book from inside his jacket, Tony had a wide self-satisfied smirk on his face. Had he been a dog, his tail would've gone wild. The look on his face could only be described as a ' _praise me, master!_ ' Gibbs had to bite his tongue hard, when the words 'good boy' nearly left his mouth without any conscious thought. He even had the urge to pet the man's head. "Our victim's diary. Seems the poor guy didn't think it was safe enough to keep it home. Gee, I wonder why."

Gibbs glanced at the book and then at the childlike grin on the man's face. The young Detective could obviously barely keep himself from bouncing up and down on the chair he was sitting on. For a moment Gibbs forgot his previous dark thoughts and he was feeling amused and... proud? Then the moment was gone when he saw Tony as the boy he had once been. The image was short, but so vivid it left him swallowing hard and with a sharp feeling of guilt and pain. He stood up fast.

"Gibbs?"

"Navy Yard," he spoke gruffly and avoided looking at the confused Detective who nearly tripped over his own feet as he hurried after the older man.

While walking to their cars, Tony kept glancing at the other man. The Agent's whole posture was stiff, although it looked like the man was trying to look relaxed. "Alright. Spit it out. There's something you want to ask. I really don't want to go through supernova Gibbs while working, so shoot. Wait, I take that back. Don't shoot."

Gibbs hid his bitter smile, his posture relaxing only slightly. "After everything... Why are you so calm?"

Tony was quiet for a while. When he finally looked at Gibbs again, there was a chilling half-smile on his face. "Who's saying I'm calm?"

His hand hovering close to his car door, Gibbs stared. The more he learned, the less he could read the man and his emotions. In the beginning he had thought this was a case of an open book and the man was what you saw. Like a fool he had fallen for it; bought the act with open arms, only to fall on the ground, face first. In his defense, he had recovered fast and had soon enough started realizing that everything seemed to be just an act. A cover up after another cover up. Act after act. Layer after layers of masks. It hurt his pride and irritated him greatly to have been fooled like this. He felt the sudden need to deliver a head slap, but he wasn't sure if it was a good idea.

"It's the way I deal with things usually, Gibbs. Some people get drunk or do something else. You go all crazy Marine and shoot people."

Gibbs couldn't stop the flinch and flash of guilt appearing on his face.

"I cover things up and hide everything, and then... Ever heard of a _calm before the storm_? That's basically what it is. When the right moment and situation happens, I unleash it all at once. It's like a superpower. The secret is to know when and how to use it. I simply open the lid and throw the bomb where I want." Tony smiled, while remembering few of such surprisingly rare situations. He had a faraway look on his face, before he sobered up and became serious. While he didn't use the word 'please', the tone of his voice was almost pleading, "Don't piss me off, Gibbs. I don't like myself very much when I'm like that."

Gibbs stared after the retreating back of the Detective. Shaking off the chills that still ran over his spine, he got inside his own car. While driving behind the other car a moment later, he thought how maybe, just maybe, he might have to completely rethink everything he knew about DiNozzo so far.


	14. My Reputation

Walking in the bullpen, they were getting few curious looks that had nothing to do with Tony. Not at first. All eyes were looking at Agent Gibbs, or rather, his nose and the bruised area around it and under his eye. Both men were avoiding looking at each other and neither seemed to be in a good mood. Then the Detective rubbed the back of his head with his hurt hand. Suddenly it was all about both Agent Gibbs and the Detective as the roomful of investigators figured out the obvious; Agent Gibbs had a broken nose, while Detective DiNozzo had hurt his right hand, and the atmosphere surrounding the two men was downright horrible. It was then that the scuttlebutt pretty much exploded.

"He's so dead," Vivian whispered to Langer and secretly they both couldn't wait to see their boss putting the cop in his place, Gibbs style. Oh, it was going to be _brutal_.

Gibbs finally looked at Tony and when they thought he was about to start yelling at DiNozzo, the look in his eyes softened for a moment, even if the tone of his voice was his usual harsh command. "DiNozzo. Sit down and start on the diary. I'll go see if Abby has something."

"Uh..." Tony hesitated, looking at the desks.

"Use mine."

Vivian and Langer stared, not believing they had seen or heard right. There just was no way it could be right. It wasn't happening. This wasn't the Gibbs they knew.

Rolling his eyes at the way the older man was bossing him around again, Tony sat down and took out the diary, completely unaware of the scuttlebutt happening around him. In only half an hour he was to be known and respected as the one who had earned Agent Gibbs' respect by throwing a punch at him. It was a reputation that would follow him for years to come, and an act that very few dared to repeat and lived to tell.

"You have a problem with me, agents?" Tony glanced up and Vivian's cheeks flushed red with anger.

Langer studied the Detective with a permanent frown. This definitely was not a good sign and neither was it good news for them. He stared for a moment at the open documents on his computer screen and then he smiled.

"What did you do, Di _Nozzo_?" Vivian snapped, but Tony merely raised his brows. "Gibbs doesn't allow _anyone_ near his desk. You've done something."

"If that's all you can come up with your investigating skills, I am truly disappointed, Viv."

Vivian scowled at the way the Detective was using her name. She had barely stood up, when Langer spoke with an odd glint in his eyes, "So... DiNozzo, huh?"

Tony frowned. "It is my name."

"There's no way someone like you, and at your age, could've made it so far as you. So I did some digging."

Tony's eyes darkened and Vivian suddenly felt the need to get away from there. Yet she was unable to look away. Langer however, hadn't noticed anything off.

"People like you are the worst, DiNozzo," Langer spat out.

"Brent..." Vivian tried to warn her partner, but the man glared at her and she bit her lip, frustrated.

"Really? And why is that?" Tony spoke with calmness, but the dark look in his eyes hadn't changed. He knew where this was going; he hadn't missed the look the Agent had cast first at him and then the computer. He'd seen the very same look with so many different variations and in so many different situations that he didn't even have to guess. He didn't try to defend himself against those accusations anymore since it didn't matter how many times he would say that he had nothing to do with his 'father' or the old man's money and that everything he had earned, wasn't without hard work and some talent. Without forgetting all those days, weeks and even months of undercover work, where he had proved his worth the hard way, and where he would most likely some day end up dying. He could feel it in his gut. He was a burnout and a lonely loser who just couldn't stop killing himself with work and had a bastard as a boss who wanted nothing more than to find a way to get rid of him. No, idiots like this one were pretty much everyday thing for him.

"Rich kid who bought his way around. What's next? Did you buy off Gibbs? Are you after one of our seats next?"

Tony chuckled darkly. "I can see you've done your homework. Sort of. As for your boss, why don't you ask him? I'm sure he would love it."

"Cut the crap, DiNozzo. If not him, then someone else. That's the only reason I can think of why he treats you like some golden boy. Gibbs doesn't do nice."

"Tell me about it," Tony muttered.

"He doesn't let people sit behind his desk and surely doesn't let them walk away after attacking him." Langer was getting a curious looking color on his face when he started to realize the younger man didn't even bat an eye at his accusations.

Tony merely shrugged and opened the diary, ignoring the agents. While seemingly absorbed in the diary, he was perfectly aware of the silent bullpen around him and then the sound of a chair being pushed aside. Before it happened, he knew it would. Two strong hands took hold of his shirt and then yanked him up violently from the chair.

"Brent!" Vivian sounded alarmed rather than endorsing.

While Tony had prepared to be given a black eye or two, he was not prepared for the fist to hit his torso. As strong as the punch was, normally he would have been able to deal with it, but with the still healing wound that kept reminding him with every moment how he should have never left the hospital so soon, even a weaker hit would have done it, which was why as soon as the fist found its target, piercing and sharp pain shot through his body. He was distantly aware that he was falling, gasping for the breath he couldn't get in.

Before the darkness took him completely, Tony thought he smelled coffee and sawdust. Then he felt two gentle hands feeling him all over. Normally he would have cracked a joke or few about it, but he was far too gone now. His brains didn't even register the loud shout close to his ears.

"DiNozzo!"

* * *

_**\- A LITTLE WHILE AGO -** _

Gibbs entered the lab and he smiled, seeing the young woman there talking to her computers as if they could really understand her. It was one of the many things she did that he could never understand, yet he loved her just the way she was. Weird quirks and all. "You have something for me?"

Abby yelped, turning around. "Gibbs! Don't do that! I hate when you do that! _You know_ I hate it when you sneak up on me!"

Gibbs chuckled. "Do you have something?"

"No... Not yet—" Of course that's when one of her machines made 'the sound', which even he knew what it meant. She narrowed her eyes and pointed her finger at him. "I swear. Someday I'm going to find out how you do it."

"Abby!"

"Right. Alright. The hair... It's not human hair. Sorry, Gibbs. Instead of a cute blonde woman, it's a cat, who I'm sure is far cuter..." She turned to look at Gibbs. Though there was a blank look on the man's face, she knew he wasn't happy. And because he wasn't happy, she wasn't happy either.

Gibbs shook his head and smiled ruefully. He had hoped this might back up DiNozzo's gut feeling about the wife. Back to square one again. "Keep working on the other samples. Let me know as soon as they're ready."

"On it, boss!" Abby cheered with a mock salute and took a huge swig of her Caf-Pow. She looked at Gibbs, with a wicked smirk on her face. "You know. That DiNozzo... I was surprised to learn you made him work with you."

"It's not what you think. Don't get any ideas." Gibbs resisted the urge to roll his eyes, as this seemed to only be throwing gasoline in the fire and indeed, her smile only got wider.

"Really? What _do_ I think?" She asked, with pure innocence on her face when she was anything but innocent.

"Get back to work," Gibbs growled half-heartedly and left the lab.

"You know he's so busted, right? Or then he just doesn't know it yet." She nodded to her machines. One of them announced her the results were ready. "Let's see... Oh. You know what this means, right? Our handsome young Detective was right." Picking up the phone, Abby hesitated and then grinned. No. She'd deliver the results herself. Perfect excuse to see how her two men were behaving around each other.

Meanwhile, Gibbs entered the bullpen, just in time to see a flash of movement in the almost deadly silent room full of people, all focused on one certain area. His. Gibbs felt fury at the sight of Langer attacking DiNozzo. Why wasn't the idiot fighting back or doing _something_? There had been no hesitation when the man broke _his_ nose. So why did he let the moron treat him like that? Surely he knew that with the whole bullpen witnessing, he had every right to attack back, to defend himself.

Gibbs was only a few steps away from Langer—who would not remain in his team after this—when the first punch hit the young Detective and soon after that the second one. DiNozzo was already falling toward the floor after the first punch and didn't seem to be even registering the second one. Gibbs flinched at the sound and only then he realized that something was wrong. Very wrong. Had the punches been harder than they looked?

Pushing Langer away, Gibbs didn't even glance up when the man staggered against the desk. Kneeling next to DiNozzo, he ran his hands over the body, trying to see if anything was broken. He noticed the glazed look in the man's eyes and how he was gasping for breath. "DiNozzo! Come on now, kid... I know you are much tougher than this."

Tony stared at nothing, with that same glazed look, before his eyes closed. At least his breathing sounded better now and Gibbs was relieved, thinking he was overreacting.

"I knew it. I knew he couldn't have gotten so far with his skills alone. What a weakling," Langer sneered. The sneer faltered the moment his boss gave him his look of danger.

"Someone, get him out of my sight, before I do something he will regret!" Gibbs growled, but didn't even bother seeing whether it was done; his full focus was now on Tony's upper body, which he had just uncovered, and he cursed softly. "Tony..."

Gibbs was staring at the bandaged torso, which was slowly getting darker from the blood. Blood, which was coming from the wound that had opened. The wound, which he had known nothing about.


	15. He's Fine

"I'm fine!"

Gibbs pushed the door open and allowed a breath of relief when he saw DiNozzo. Just a moment ago he'd been standing anxiously in the waiting area and thinking of all possible scenarios to happen. He'd even had the horror picture of the doctor coming to him, covered in blood, and shaking his head sadly. Then the screaming had started, thankfully before those visions got any worse.

Looking at him now, the young Detective was very much alive; looking like he'd bleed to death if something wasn't being done soon, but alive.

"Gibbs!" Tony stopped struggling against the hands holding him down.  "What are you doing here? Never mind. _Please_ tell them that I'm fine." He was back to struggling and there was a wild look in his eyes. He and hospitals were not friends. Point him a nurse or a doctor and he'd point out his archenemy. Ducky was a rare breed of the bunch and the only one with a 'doctor' in front of his name whom he actually liked so far.

"What's going on?" Gibbs glared at the people in the room.

Seeing him, the doctor looked relieved. "I would rather not, but if your Agent doesn't calm down, we have to sedate him."

"He's not my— Why sedate?"

"As soon as he woke up, he started fighting and trying to leave. But if he does sign himself out, he'll either bleed to death or get an infection."

Gibbs shook his head, wondering why he had to be the one doing this. He wasn't DiNozzo's father or even his boss. They weren't exactly friends either.

"Get your hands off me!" Tony snapped at the nurses trying to hold him still.

"DiNozzo!" Seeing as words were not working, Gibbs moved closer and slapped Tony's head. Everything froze in the room and the doctor looked horrified.

Tony stared with wide eyes and then suddenly he snarled between his teeth, "You touch me again and I'll break your arm!"

Confused by this behavior, Gibbs decided to file it for another time, and leaned forward. "Calm down or I will personally make sure they both sedate you _and_ strap you in bed." He was shocked by the amount of fear he saw in the man's eyes. "DiNozzo?"

Tony looked away. "I'll let them do whatever it is they're going to do. Just... Leave."

Feeling like he'd done something bad, Gibbs didn't want to leave, but one of the male nurses pushed him outside the room rather harshly. The last thing he saw of the young Detective, uncontrollable tremors were running through him as the doctor and nurses surrounded him once more. It was like looking at some frightened animal, cornered by the hunters and their dogs, ready to attack. The picture did little to reassure Gibbs as he was back to waiting.

"Jethro!" Ducky rushed toward him, haggard with worry. "I came as soon as I could— Jethro?" He stopped talking and looked at the openly confused look on his friend's face.

"I don't know, Duck. I think I did something bad, but I don't know what."

"Let me guess. Anthony woke up."

"Yes. How did you know?"

Ducky shook his head, wondering just how much he was allowed to tell. "The poor boy does not handle his hospital visits well. Unless he has been drugged out of his mind, he will use the first chance he gets to escape."

"I don't like staying in a hospital either, but even I never... It was bad. You should've seen him and the look on his face when I threatened to let them sedate him."

That got a sharp look from the old doctor. "You did what? Oh, Jethro..."

"What?"

"I cannot speak about his personal life and past, but believe me, his fear is deep and for a very good reason. I wish it were not so."

"And you can't tell me? Come on, Ducky. I need to know what I'm dealing with here. If he's some—"

"He is not," Ducky spoke sharply, not letting Gibbs finish that sentence. "Anthony..." He was obviously thinking carefully his words before speaking again. "Anthony had the misfortune of being treated by a doctor who should have _never_ been allowed anywhere near any patients, let alone children. He was just a child then and the person who should have made sure he never experienced any of such misfortune, turned a blind eye." That person of course was Tony's father who had been the reason for the need of a doctor in the first place.

Gibbs furrowed his brows, feeling something bad in his gut as his imagination started running wild, imagining what might have caused this kind of fear.

"I already said more than I should, Jethro... However, I need for you to understand that this is not his fault. And while normally I would not think it wise, but in Anthony's case the sooner he gets out of the hospital, the faster he will heal. Now, I must go see him. A friendly face and someone he trusts is the next best thing that he can have right now..."

Gibbs flinched as he remembered the way he had been with Tony. He looked away, until Ducky was gone. Once he was alone again, he finally allowed himself to sit down.

Several hours later it was not just the doctor and Ducky who finally showed up, but with them there was a wheelchair and heavily drugged Tony sitting on it. His right hand was holding Ducky's shirt in a white death grip. The look on his face was almost adoring, since the old man was the one taking him out of the hated place.

"I still think this is a very foolish thing to do," the doctor following them spoke. He had a deep exhausted frown etched to his face and he was obviously very much against this. So much that Gibbs couldn't understand why Ducky of all people was doing this.

"Believe me, I do know. I also know from past experiences—including my own mistakes, I hate to admit—that staying here will only cause Anthony further harm and damage."

"Ducky... Home," Tony wailed dazedly. As much trouble as he had forming clear words and thoughts, leaving the hospital was the number one thing in his mind, which no amount of drugs had been able to take away. He glared at Gibbs and pointed at him with his free hand. "Stay!" he slurred and shook his hand.

Gibbs blinked. He looked at Ducky, silently demanding for an explanation, but the man ignored it. Ducky touched Tony's face gently and the young man's upset face turned into a smile, bright like the sun. The adoring look on his face was back.

"I like you. Goooood," Tony slurred heavily.

"Yes. I like you too, Anthony. Now, if your doctor would be so kind and let us go."

"You bad man," Tony said to the doctor. The doctor frowned again, but didn't follow them this time as they left.

"Ducky..."

"It's just the drugs talking, Jethro."

"That's not what I wanted to ask."

"I know. I need to take our young friend to my home. Then I have to find someone to look after Anthony while I'm at work. I am afraid this is going to be a busy week for me."

Gibbs frowned and before he realized, he spoke those words. He couldn't believe they had actually come out of _his_ mouth, but they were out before he could even think about it. "I can take him to my place."

"Are you sure, Jethro? He can be quite handful when he is sick or injured, does not cooperate well, if at all, and does not take his medication."

"I'll worry about those things as they come."

"Well, that is wonderful." Ducky pushed the wheelchair in front of Gibbs and smiled. "There. If you do not mind, I must get back to work then."

"Actually..." Gibbs started, but Ducky was already gone. For someone who didn't usually move so fast, it had to be a personal record. Staring down at the drugged young Detective, who was half asleep now, Gibbs scowled as the realization hit him. He'd been played!

* * *

The ride to his place went without much happening. Tony was sleeping and Gibbs had time to think about how his wife might react. He hadn't even called her to give her a chance to prepare for it,et alone say yes or no. Glancing at the drooling young man sleeping next to him, he couldn't help but smile. This 'man' indeed was still a kid. Stopping the car in front of his house, Gibbs sat there for a moment, once again wondering how could he have ever pulled a gun on Tony. Leaning forward, he brushed away the hair from the man's face and he couldn't help but think he needed a haircut. The sound of the front door opening startled him and he got out of the car.

Shannon frowned when she saw there was someone else in the car. "What's going on?"

"Tony."

She smiled. "Ah. Is he asleep?"

"I think they pumped him so full of drugs at the hospital, he'll probably sleep till tomorrow."

Shannon looked alarmed and rushed forward. "Drugs? Hospital? Jethro! Why didn't you call me?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Didn't think. He shouldn't be even moving around now, let alone left the hospital, but Ducky told me he has some big fear toward hospitals so he can't stay there. So he's staying with us until he's doing better."

"Is he now?" Shannon narrowed her eyes. Walking past him, she slapped the back of his head gently. "You're lucky I like the kid."

Gibbs opened the car door. With the wound and drugs, it wasn't going to be easy to move the man from the car to the bed upstairs. "Maybe it's good he's out of it. He won't feel embarrassed... Keep the door open for me."

Shannon raised her eyebrow, but did as told. She watched as Gibbs gently leaned forward and took Tony in his arms, which was not an easy thing to do with a grown man even if you were a former Marine, and it wouldn't have worked without some willpower. She shook her head. While she didn't know the Detective, she was pretty sure the young man would not appreciate this. Men and their pride...

Gibbs huffed and wheezed as he made his painful way inside. He wasn't as young and strong as he used to be and as much as the Detective might've been still a kid in his heart, and a little too skinny, from the outside he was all grown up. Tall and heavy. "I hope the guest room is good to use... because ready or not... we're going there."

Shannon hurried in the room first. Pulling the heavy blankets away, she watched as Gibbs let out a deep and relieved sigh, after laying the sleeping man in bed.

"Now I really could use a massage..." He glanced at his wife, who shook her head.

"No. Take it as a punishment for doing things behind my back again."

"Shannon..." Gibbs grumbled and followed after the redhead.

* * *

The morning came slowly, but by the time it came, Tony woke up as soon as the clock hit 6 AM. His inner timer was telling him it was time to get up, while his bladder was protesting the urgent need for some relief. As he tried getting up, a sharp pain made him fall back with a groan. Blinking his eyes for a long time, he frowned, wondering where he was. The last clear memory was getting punched by that idiot Langer and then... Oh man... The hospital? He also had a strange feeling he had at some point been floating in the air, but there was no way that was possible. Had to be the drugs.

"You awake?"

Turning his head, Tony saw Gibbs standing there at the doorway. Seeing the big bad Gibbs with a bed hair and not his usual workplace scowl, made him chuckle. The man's morning scowl was almost—did he dare to even think it?—cute and grumpy.

"What?" Gibbs scowled even more. He'd only had his first cup of coffee that morning.

"You look... normal."

Gibbs noticed how Tony kept squirming. "You need to go?"

"Yeah..."

Despite the quiet complaints, Gibbs helped Tony up and in the bathroom. Although he refused to leave the room in fear of Tony falling over, he did turn his back on him.

"I could've managed just fine," Tony muttered when they returned and he was lying in bed again. "Where am I anyway?"

"My place."

"Your... Gibbs, I'm sure you know by now that I don't exactly want to be here. Besides, I'm _fine_."

"So you keep saying. You know, if you don't tell her, then I will. So how is it going to be?"

"Gibbs..."

"Not only because of her. I think you need it just as much. We all do."

Tony glanced around the room desperately.

"If you know what's good for you, you won't even think about escaping. You are in no condition of going anywhere and Ducky will have both our heads. And what were you thinking?!"

Not affected by the angry growl, Tony glared. "I don't see what your problem is. I've been doing my work just fine."

Gibbs snorted. "Oh yeah? And when it would have come to chasing down a suspect and something happened then? Would you have left me without a backup and then both of us could've been killed?"

The glare disappeared and Tony looked lost. "I didn't... I wouldn't have let that happen. No matter what, I'd never... Never leave my partner with no backup."

The look Gibbs wore, softened just a fraction. "I don't doubt that. You seem the kind who will fight to the very bitter end... But please, think about how this feels to me, not knowing you're hurt this bad and I've been dragging you everywhere. Then having my Agent seemingly beat you to almost death."

"It wasn't supposed to go down that way."

"Oh yeah? That's another thing. Why did you just let him hit you in the first place? You weren't feeling hurt enough?" The look on Gibbs' face _dared_ the Detective to lie.

Rolling his eyes, Tony crossed his arms over his chest. The effect was lost when he was still lying down and he flinched at the pain. "I didn't think that of all places he'd go for would be my little battle wound. I figured I'd let him take a swing and then I would have no reason to hold back. Guess it didn't go exactly as I planned."

"You think?" Gibbs glanced toward the fixed wound. All he knew was that there was a wound there somewhere, but he hadn't actually seen it. "So... That happened when?"

Tony grinned and he looked suddenly like someone who couldn't wait to share something funny. "This one, you won't believe it unless you saw it. I was working undercover, just some weeks ago..."

Gibbs snorted. Undercover. That actually made sense and explained few things... He listened patiently as the Detective shared what he was allowed, until he finally got to the part where he got hurt.

"...by then everything seemed to be under control, you know? The bad guys were taken, another bunch of criminals were finally off the streets and even better, it all had been done without breaking or twisting even one letter of the law. There's no way those guys are seeing the daylight again and even if someone or something new does come up later, we got the head."

"If all the bad guys were taken, then how did you manage to get hurt?"

"Ah... You see... It wasn't the criminals who... Actually... It's kind of embarrassing, now that I think about it..."

"DiNozzo." Gibbs wasn't patient and now he had a bad feeling, knowing he wasn't going to like it.

Tony avoided looking at the Agent. "People assume it was one of the bad guys, but actually it was an accident. I was so tired and ready to drop while walking..."

"Just get to the point."

"I was walking over this bridge with one of the suspects, when I heard this noise. The bridge was old so I guess it was my own fault really... I don't myself remember much after that, other than the pain, but my partner told me later that the bridge collapsed and I fell down. My luck worked as it always does and I landed right on some stake. Can you believe it? Turns out, the bad guys had a secret hideout down there; stuff they had stolen from private collectors. All kinds of treasures. Including some stake from the Middle Ages, which I've been told was stolen from a private museum. Who would steal a stake?"

"DiNozzo..."

"Right. Short version... I got pierced by the thing and I've been told it's a miracle I didn't die right then and there. It's just my luck to almost get killed _after_ the case is closed."

Gibbs had observed the man—mostly his face and body language—and while he still couldn't be too sure he got anything right, he'd started picking up things and changes so subtle that normally you would never even know they were there. "You're sure it was an accident?"

It was gone so fast that anyone else would have thought it never was there in the first place, but Gibbs had noticed it and didn't dismiss it. The tiniest crack in the mask. With a sinking feeling in his gut, Gibbs felt his mouth turn into a tight line.

"Why? You mean you know something I don't know?" Tony laughed, feeling nervous and fighting back the urge to look away, knowing that if he did so, then his thoughts might have as well be written all over his face.

"No. But I think you do."

Forcing himself to not roll his eyes, Tony grimaced as he tried to sit up. "Well, you're wrong."

"Just lie down, DiNozzo. If you end up bleeding again like you did yesterday, I'll take you back to the hospital myself."

Tony slumped down with annoyed look on his face. "Why am I here anyway? Where's Ducky?"

"Ducky is busy. Now, I'm going to ask you again... Will you tell her or do I have to do it?" Gibbs asked, hearing Shannon walking toward the room.


	16. Crushed

Eating his breakfast like a good boy, Tony glanced at the woman who was still sitting there next to his bed and looking wistful for some reason. "Thank you. It was good," he said, startling her. Shannon smiled and picked up the tray.

"Do you want more?"

"No. I'm good."

Instead of taking the tray away, she put it on the floor and remained where she was, looking at him curiously. "Jethro told me there's something you want to tell me?"

Tony looked away from her. "Um... Yeah. Both he and Ducky think I need to do it so I can start moving on or something. I guess, no, I know they're right, but I really hate it when they are. I suppose I'm too used to running away from things like this."

"Move on from what?"

Tony squirmed. He was feeling uncomfortable, even with the many pillows holding him up in a sitting position, and of course the pain medicine. "Where is he anyway? Gibbs."

"Work."

He looked at her surprised and tried to get up. "What? Why didn't he tell me?"

"Easy there, Tony." Shannon held her hand gently over Tony's chest and much to his embarrassment, he fell easily back down.

"I'm supposed to be working on the case, not sleeping at his home of all places."

"I wouldn't call this sleeping," Shannon pointed out wryly and Tony grimaced, not at all amused that she had to bring out his condition.

"Yeah. Well, he's not my boss. In fact, my own boss ordered me to get to work. Bolton won't be happy to find out I spent that time sleeping." In reality Bolton would most likely be disappointed that he hadn't bled to death, which wasn't something Tony would be saying out loud. Ever since the two of them met for the first time all those years ago, the man kept trying to make his life way harder than necessary. It was funny almost how easily he seemed to bring out the worst in certain people. Bolton and Langer being good examples.

"I suppose that's true. But would it be so bad to let us take care of you?"

Tony frowned and didn't answer. He had a feeling that his answer wouldn't be taken well.

"Look, I'll be honest with you; my husband is a grumpy old Marine."

Tony grinned. Oh yeah, grumpy was the word. Although bit of an understatement. Of the year.

"Those friends that he does have, he doesn't bring them home. Yet here you are. He doesn't bring even his own injured partners here, let alone take care of them personally. He must think very highly of you."

"Oh sure," Tony replied with sarcasm and Shannon chuckled. It was amusing to see the look on the young man's face. It was like looking in the past. Seeing younger Jethro sometimes so clearly all over the Detective was bittersweet. When both she and Jethro had still been young like Tony and when Jethro had been less hardened by life.

There had been several moments where she found herself just staring at Tony and remembering the times when things had been so much more... simple and easier. Before the Marine lifestyle, and then the NCIS, started changing her husband. Little by little, taking away pieces of him, never to be returned. Sure, they still loved each other just as much as when they said ' _I do_ ', but there were times when she feared that despite all the love, they wouldn't last. Every year she heard how yet another NCIS couple ended their marriage. One or both of them not being able to take the demanding lifestyle of an Agent anymore and what it did to their relationships. Shannon's own mother didn't exactly make matters any easier for her and Jethro. The woman kept trying to break them apart, as if they weren't already having their own struggles.

"So," Tony started slowly. "I'm surprised your husband allows a stranger under his roof, with no supervision from him. After all the attempts to hurt or kill his family so far, if I were him I would be paranoid."

It was true. Jethro had barely let anyone close to their family, which was actually one of their many big arguments. The biggest one had been allowing their daughter to go to a college so far away from his watchful eyes. He let her go only after finding out that there was an old Marine friend of his who could look after her for him... So indeed, why? Why now and why this man? What made this stranger so different from many people they still dared to call their friends, yet were unable to gain Jethro's full trust?

"Maybe he's trusting his gut feelings on this." Shannon frowned, obviously not believing it herself. Distantly she was also wondering how Tony knew about those attempts to harm their family. Perhaps Jethro had told him? But again, that was so different from what he had done for years now, never sharing anything with anyone. Well, not the big things anyway. Often not even with his own wife, which was another big argument of theirs.

Tony looked like someone who was getting lost in his own memories. Then he hesitated and spoke with a pained voice, "Shannon. Do you think Howard would've lived if he'd had a partner with him on that day?"

Shannon stared and a strange feeling of foreboding was starting to spread through her body, like a warm blanket, and yet it left her feeling almost cold. "Who?"

"Howard. Agent Howard. You know, the NIS Agent who was sent to keep you and your daughter safe. Ten years ago."

Shannon swallowed hard and blinked and then swallowed again. It had taken _years_ for her to get over that day and still she sometimes had nightmares. Actually, she wasn't sure if she had gotten over it. She still found it hard to let herself even think about it. "I don't know. Maybe. Why? Did you know him?"

The green eyes met hers and it was like she was being pulled in them as a long forgotten memory came to her. The face she was looking at transformed before her eyes. It became softer, more like a child's. And most importantly, as much as there was hardness in those eyes that no child should have, the boy still held an air of innocence, which brought out her every motherly instinct.

 **_"You sure don't look your age..." Shannon said and studied the skinny boy sitting there._ **  
**_He had a blank look on his face, but the green eyes flashed dangerously. He never said anything though and he hid the angry scowl from her,_ **  
**_but she caught it anyway. She knew it was born out of anger, yet she still found him such a cute thing that she spoke before thinking,_ **  
**_"Don't take it the wrong way, but you must be one of the cutest things I have ever seen..."_ **  
**_She caught from the corner of her eye the wide-eyed stare her little girl was giving. Oh, someone was having her first crush._ **  
**_She couldn't wait to tell Jethro. Or maybe not. Who knew what her husband would do to the poor boy._ **

"Shannon?"

Shannon blinked and smiled sadly. "I'm sorry. I got lost in my memories for a moment."

Tony hesitated. "What kind of... memories?"

"You remind me of a boy. The other Tony. He was such a cute little thing."

Tony grimaced and there was a flash of annoyance in his eyes, which he wasn't even trying to hide. "I take it that he was pretty young then?" Of course he knew the answer, but he couldn't help but ask anyway. After all these years, he still got annoyed and sometimes angry at how he'd been treated as a teenager.

While he still didn't look his age, at least he no longer had to carry around with him a thick bunch of papers of proof to show that he _was_ legally old enough to drive a car and to get a drink in a bar... Actually, he still sometimes ended up in a few embarrassing situations if the bar was one he had never been in before. Maybe he should grow a beard and change his style? Different clothes to make him look a little bit more professional? Whatever it was, the keyword here was _older_. He may be sought-after when it came to his undercover skills, and sometimes his youthful looks did help there, but he needed to be taken more seriously outside that part of his work. He wasn't sure how much more of undercover work he could live with. It was eating him up, slowly killing him inside out, and he kept losing parts of himself after each 'gig'. Too bad he wasn't given much choice in the matter, or enough recovery time. It was a wonder Frost hadn't yet hanged Bolton for making this possible, but it was only a matter of time. That or he'd end up dead first.

"Oh no. He was sixteen."

"Really? I'm sure a _sixteen_ years old guy _loved_ being called _cute_."

"Oh?" Shannon was surprised by the amount of venom in the young man's voice. Like it was personal insult.

"Sorry. It's the drugs. Even if they're the ones I prefer, they still seem to make me lose my cool sometimes. And tongue."

"It's alright, son." Shannon smiled. She'd already forgotten that Tony was supposed to tell her something and she'd even taken a day off from work for this, which was something he rarely did in these days, since Jethro himself pretty much lived for work now. The bastard.

"Do you remember that day when Howard died?"

The smile disappeared and she looked away. "Yes. I do, but..." Her breath hitched. "I'm sorry. I hope you don't think I'm being rude, but I really don't want to talk about it."

"Why not?"

"I can't, Tony. It brings out memories I would much rather forget." She stood up and picking up the tray, she was heading toward the door.

"What kind of memories?"

Shannon sighed and turned to face the young man again. Seeing the intense stare, she was hit with another memory.

 **_The bleeding sight of the young boy froze her and then snapped her out of her state of shock at the same time._ **  
**_He spoke with a pained voice and it was clear that he was losing too much blood and fast,_ **  
**_"We need to get out of here... With a car... We'll drive to the nearest place that has cops and guns... Or just anything..."_ **  
**_She was going to argue. After all, she was the adult here. She was a mother. It was her job to protect the children._ **  
**_She opened her mouth, but the intense look the boy gave her..._ **  
**_It was like looking at Jethro and she found herself doing whatever he told them to._ **  
**_Much later she would remember this with a deep shame and regret. Thinking if she'd taken the control of the situation,_ **  
**_instead of the young boy who was bleeding to death in front of her eyes, things could have turned out so much differently._ **  
**_Both kids could still be alive. They should still be alive._ **

"Another flashback?" Tony had a knowing look in his eyes and Shannon frowned. There was something there... Something she couldn't get hold of.

"You could say that."

"Either it is or it isn't." Then Tony closed his eyes and sighed. There really was no perfect way of doing this, to drop the bomb, so he might as well just get it out without any drama. "I'm Tony. _That_ Tony."

"What?" She looked confused.

"I'm the kid from ten years ago. Agent Howard's Tony. I... I didn't die. I don't know why you were told that, but I'm very much alive."

Shannon stared at him for a while and then her eyes widened and she dropped the tray. The glass breaking startled them both. So much for not making a big deal out of this.

Seeing as the woman was in danger of either passing out or just falling down on the broken pieces of glass, Tony jumped out of bed, for a moment forgetting the pain it caused him. "Are you alright? I'm really sorry. I didn't mean..." He helped her to sit down on the bed, making sure they didn't step on any glass he could see.

"Sorry?" Shannon seemed to finally snap out of it and then suddenly and much like Gibbs had done before, she took hold of his face and studied it. She seemed to still be in shock though. "Of course... How didn't I see it?" she whispered. Her hands were trembling and they refused to leave his face, squeezing almost painfully, as if holding him tight like that would not make him turn out to be just her imagination.

"Shannon..." Tony muttered between his squished cheeks and she finally let go, although she looked like if he were to make one wrong move, she'd be back to touching him.

"I don't understand. How..?" She took in the handsome young man sitting there. Her mind was spinning in confusion, while at the same time she was happy to notice that although he did look older, there was still that same young boy all over him. Sure, there was certain hardness also, which the life and his work as a cop must have put in him, but he still was the same boy and now she was wondering how she hadn't realized it before.

Tony shrugged. "Beats me. I never faked my death or anything, so it's not _my_ fault."

Shannon frowned. "But I just... I really don't understand. You're alive. You are real? I'm not imagining this?"

"No, you're not imagining anything."

"But I don't understand. I still remember it. When Mike came to see us in the hospital—Mike Franks. He became Jethro's boss later. They worked together for years and Jethro seemed to like him. One of the few people he allowed in our home after the... incident—I remember asking him about you and that girl. I'm pretty sure Mike told me you had all died. I must have heard wrong or there was some misunderstanding..." She couldn't take her eyes off of him. Part of her was afraid that if she did, he'd be proven to be just something her mind made up. Perhaps she was losing her mind. That thought scared her.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's it," Tony agreed, but inwardly he was laughing. Yeah right. For one reason or another, the old bastard had decided to lie. Why? He wouldn't know. Was the man afraid that they would find him and find out the truth about what really happened? That if Franks had done his job properly and not sent Howard out there without a partner, they could all still be alive. And why had an Agent like Franks, who should've known better, let two kids go to a dangerous situation?

Tony felt the familiar feeling of bitterness fill him again. Howard had been an amazing Agent; one of the very best and one of a kind, with so much potential. He had climbed up the ranks faster than almost anyone else before him. Who knows where his brother could have been now. People like Howard weren't born everyday and not all of them used their God given talents for good. For his own good, Mike Franks better stay in whatever hole he was hiding now...

Clenching his fists, Tony forced himself to calm down. "I'm sorry you had to think I was dead."

Shannon shook her head and started crying. "Oh, Tony. You have no idea what this means to me... I'm not entirely sure why, but I never got over your death. We never even found your parents or even your grave—nothing—so that I could have made my peace with it. We never found out your full name either. Not without any access to the information."

Tony smiled bitterly. "Although I called Howard my brother, he wasn't. Not in blood. My parents, you couldn't find them since I don't have any."

Her eyes widened. "Oh. I'm so sorry..."

"Don't be. I couldn't be happier," Tony snorted without thinking and saw the shocked look she gave him. "I mean... I've had a good life. I've never missed out anything. Good people have taken care of me." He was almost flat-out lying, but she seemed to buy the story.

Shannon hesitated, raising up her arms. "Can I? Would you mind if I..?"

"What? Oh. I... I guess it's alright. I don't... mind." Tony barely finished talking, when he was pulled into a strong hug. He flinched at the pain it caused him, but the warm feeling in his heart was far stronger and he soon found himself blinking away a few stubborn tears. Was this what a mother's hug felt like? Unlike any other hugs, this felt so different. Thinking like that, he felt crushed. He shouldn't be thinking this way. She was someone else's mother and he was a grown up man and she was simply feeling grateful that she no longer had to feel guilty over his death. That's all it was. Glancing at the clock on the wall, Tony saw that it was a little over 9 AM. Merely few hours since he woke up, yet it felt like a lifetime had passed. Lifetime worth of memories anyway.

* * *

They were sitting there in awkward silence. Much to his discomfort, Shannon had for a while been unable to keep her hands away and constantly making sure he was really there and trying to ask what he remembered from that tragic day, just to keep making sure he really was who he said he was. Tony caught on it soon and ended up growling at her in a very Gibbs like manner, surprising them both. Now they were both feeling guilty and the previous moment of closeness was gone.

"How's Kelly doing?" Tony finally asked when it seemed neither knew how to move on from the situation.

Shannon relaxed. "Oh, she's doing wonderfully. She and her friend Maddie seem to really like their life away from their overprotective Marine dads." The look on her face turned teasing. "You know, you were her first crush?"

Tony looked uncomfortable. "That's... nice. I really hope Gibbs doesn't know that."

Shannon laughed joyously. "Oh, he knows alright. For a year she kept going on and on about you until she found another crush. Her teacher. Jethro scared the poor young man to almost death."

Tony shuddered at the thought and thanked God it was all in the past. Hopefully it would stay there. He didn't feel like getting the fury of daddy Gibbs on him.

"Don't worry too much about it, son. Jethro couldn't really be mad at you since you were... dead." Shannon frowned and for a moment her good mood was gone.

"Oh sure. But now he knows I'm alive and well. He's bound to remember and I truly hope that by then I'm gone from the shooting range." He wasn't joking.

"Don't worry. I won't let him shoot you." Shannon smiled, teasingly. Unaware what memories were filling Tony's mind.

"Well, my plan is to be gone before he even gets the chance." Rubbing his wounded area, he sighed. "You wouldn't mind bringing me couple of those pills again?"

Shannon's eyes widened as she remembered why he was there in the first place. "Of course. I am so sorry."

"Don't worry about it too much."

"Nonsense. It was stupid of me to... Wait here. I'll bring them to you. Do you need anything else? Pancakes! I could make you pancakes."

Tony chuckled and shook his head. "I just had breakfast."

"Right..." Patting his shoulder awkwardly, Shannon left. Leaving Tony alone with his thoughts.

It had all gone so easily. Having been prepared for some major meltdown or something else dramatic, he was almost disappointed. He laughed at himself. "You're an idiot, Anthony. For once things go well and you complain."

With his hand over his wound, Tony stood up slowly and started picking up the pieces of glass on the floor. He smiled, amused, when he could soon smell the pancakes from downstairs. So she decided to make them anyway... Hopefully she didn't completely forget those pills, since he really felt like taking a whole bottle right now.

Tony returned in the room after throwing away the glass, but before he could lie back in bed, something caught his eye. "No way."

Walking to the window, he stared. It was the wife. Their victim's wife. She stood on the other side of the street, next to a car, and stared straight back at him. Seeing him looking at her, she smiled and he found himself fighting back a visible shudder. Glancing over his shoulder when he heard Shannon return, Tony felt worry fill his mind. He didn't know how the woman had found him and what she even wanted from him, but there was no way he could take any chances that could put Shannon in danger. Lord only knew what kind of person the woman out there was and what she could do.


	17. Battle Of Wills

After Shannon left the room again, Tony tried to think fast. The pain medicine wasn't working yet and it hurt to move around. Not to mention he'd been told not to. But he was a grown man and at worst Gibbs could only yell and growl at him. Perhaps give one of those lovely head slaps. He was more worried what Ducky and Frost would do. One was a doctor and the other was... Frost. Both had the power to make his life harder.

Holding his hand over his chest and trying to not rub it too hard, Tony left the bedroom silently. He heard Shannon cooking in the kitchen and for a moment he felt guilty. What if something went wrong and he'd make her worry? Pushing all such thoughts away, he left the house. Right now he had bigger worries to think about.

The woman's eyes were focused on every movement he made and it seemed like she knew he'd come. "Detective."

Putting on his best 'Mr. charm the pants off' smile, Tony didn't have to act the surprise in his voice when he stopped next to the blonde. "Aren't you full of surprises. What are you doing here?"

* * *

_**\- EARLIER THAT MORNING -** _

Entering the bullpen, Gibbs almost smiled at the way people were throwing cautious glances his way. His temper was legendary and anyone who knew that look on his face, knew better than to try small talk with him. Stopping in front of Blackadder's desk, he scowled. "Where's Langer?"

Vivian shrugged, keeping her eyes on the computer screen. She'd seen this infamous temper of her boss many times before and while it made chills run through her body, she wasn't afraid. Some might call it stupid. "Don't know. Haven't seen him since yesterday."

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. Sometimes he really wondered why Tom even bothered forcing these people to work with him. They didn't like him and he certainly didn't have the patience for anyone who couldn't keep up with him and his high demands. "What happened before... We will talk about it later."

"What?" Vivian looked up surprised. "I had nothing to do with it."

"So it was only Langer who did that background check on DiNozzo and then threw it all back in his face?" Gibbs didn't mention that it had been something he'd been planning on making them do for him anyway. Seeing the way it had gone, he was glad he hadn't. He didn't need to feel even guiltier than he already did.

Vivian swallowed and dropped her gaze fast. As much as she claimed that she wasn't afraid, she could never look her boss in the eyes for too long and today there just seemed to be something different there, something dangerous, bubbling under the surface. "I didn't..."

"You didn't what, Blackadder?" Gibbs snarled. Before Vivian could answer, the elevator opened again, revealing this time Brent Langer. It seemed the man had not been afraid to come to work. Gibbs wasn't impressed. "Langer. In my office," he growled and the other man glanced around nervously, but everyone in the room acted ignorant and suddenly busy with work.

"Boss... About yesterday," Langer started, but was violently pushed back in the elevator by Gibbs who followed after and closed the doors.

No one in the bullpen had to see it to know that the next thing happening would be the infamous use of the emergency stop. Anything after that? In a room with no witnesses and with Gibbs who was famous for doing things that would cause normal people to end up with serious consequences? No one dared to even imagine it. To everyone's surprise it took only few minutes for the doors to open again. Outside stepped Gibbs, with unreadable expression on his face. Only barely before the doors closed again, Langer followed him. There seemed to be no bodily harm done to the Agent, but the look on his face was that of pure horror and his skin color was ashen.

"You know what to do, Langer," Gibbs growled and the man flinched as if he was hit. "When I'm back, I don't want to see any remainders of you." Saying that the older Agent stormed toward the Director's office.

"Man, what did he do?" one of the agents asked Langer who didn't even look up as he rushed to clean up his desk from his things.

"He fired you? Can he even do that?" Vivian asked, hardly surprised, but her tough as nails now former partner's behavior was puzzling to her. What on earth could have happened in such short amount of time?

Langer didn't bother answering and he left the bullpen only ten minutes later. Now that the worst of his shock at having to deal with Gibbs was gone, he was beginning to be filled with humiliation and with the audience in the room, he couldn't get away fast enough. The last they saw of Langer was his face filled with anger, right before the elevator doors closed again.

Meanwhile, Tom Morrow looked up wearily when the door to his office burst open. "Agent Gibbs..."

Gibbs was seething. "Cut the act, Tom! I came to inform you that I'm now one Agent short."

Tom frowned and rubbed his temples. Who needed to be hit on the head to get a headache, with this man around? "Jethro, not this again... How on earth am I supposed to explain yet another Agent being sent away? I still don't know what you did to your last probie. Should I start looking for the body as some suggest?"

Gibbs snorted. "That one was so green that after one failure, he couldn't even deal with the punishment and took off himself. As for Langer, I didn't send him away. I fired him."

"Jethro, you can't just fire people as you please. That's my job. Do you have _any_ idea how hard it is actually finding people who are willing to work with you?" Tom frowned again, remembering the scene he too had seen between Langer and the young Detective. He understood the anger. In fact, he had called Agent Langer, to have a little 'talk' with him this morning. So much for being faster than Gibbs.

"That SOB has one serious attitude problem. Not someone I want to work with. Let alone someone who should be working to keep law and order, when he himself has trouble with it. I would have kicked him out soon anyway."

Tom chuckled. 'Attitude problem' seemed to be fine only as long as the one with it was Gibbs himself. "Look. There's not much I can do at this rate. There aren't enough agents out there to keep sending them your way, even if they would all be willing to work with you. You keep either firing them or scaring them away faster than I can find new ones."

"Then stop giving them to me! I can work on my own just fine!"

"Either we will find someone you can work with or I'll wash my hands of this and you know what that means. I will let someone else decide what to do. I can't protect you from that forever and you know it. Nowadays it's pretty much a requirement to treat people you work with, with respect, whether you actually respect them or not." There was humor, mixed with sarcasm, in Tom's voice.

Gibbs scowled and for a split second he looked like upset schoolboy with an attitude as he crossed his arms over his chest. The look was replaced with a smug half-smile. "I'd like to see anyone trying anything. I'm known to have things my way."

"Oh, we are all familiar with that. Very much so. I'll tell you what... If you can find someone to work with on your own, we won't be having this discussion anymore. Do we both agree?" Seeing the stubborn way Gibbs glared at him, Tom sighed. "Jethro."

"Fine," Gibbs muttered and turned around, storming out of the office. Tom flinched when the door slammed closed.

Gibbs was on his way back to the bullpen when his phone rang. For a moment he pondered if he should just ignore it, but then he realized it could be his wife. Hoping that it would be nothing, he finally answered it after another moment of hesitation. "I can't talk right now—"

_"He's gone!"_ Shannon's voice was filled with panic and... fear?

Gibbs froze at the stairs. "Who?"

_"Tony! I went downstairs to make some pancakes and when I went back, he was gone from his room!"_


	18. And Battle Of Wits

Stopping the car carelessly in front of his house, Gibbs didn't even bother taking the keys with him before he stormed inside. "Shannon!"

His wife came to him with a sheepish look on her face. "I'm so sorry, Jethro. I tried calling you back, but you didn't pick up your phone." She gave a pointed look at him for breaking his own rule; rule number 3, to be precise. He, of course, ignored it.

"Once I find his sorry ass, he's gonna beg for Ducky to save him."

"No, listen. Don't be too hard on him. It turns out he just needed some fresh air. He didn't go anywhere and he's back in his bed. I should've checked before calling you."

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. "Fresh air, you say?"

Shannon frowned. "Jethro..."

"Stay here. I mean it. The kid and I are going to have a little talk."

"Jethro!"

Taking two steps at a time, Gibbs rushed upstairs in the guest room. He could almost swear several veins in his head popped, seeing the young Detective sitting on bed, looking better since he last saw him, eating pancakes and watching TV. Gibbs did a double take _._ TV?

"Shannon and your neighbor brought it up here," Tony answered the unsaid question, without even looking at the doorway where Gibbs now stood huffing and seeing red.

"DiNozzo."

" _Run silent, run deep._ 1958\. You know who the character reminds me of? The one played by Clark Gable."

Ignoring the complaints, Gibbs turned off the TV. "What did you do?"

"I was _trying_ to watch TV, since there's not much else I can do after you all joined forces against me."

"Try again. I know you did something. And don't give me the _needed some fresh air_ lie you gave to my wife."

Tony rolled his eyes and then he grinned. "You're good. I'll give you that. Okay, here's the deal, and I'm only going to explain it to you once, so listen well."

The almost childlike excitement didn't do anything about getting rid of the nasty feeling Gibbs had been having ever since Shannon called him.

"I swear I was being a good boy and didn't leave the bed. Well, expect that one time when I got rid of the broken glass on the floor." Seeing that Gibbs was going to ask, Tony shook his head and shoved a big piece of pancake into his mouth. "Not now," was what he said, but with his mouth full it was hard to understand, which actually made the angry man crack a hint of smile.

"Your parents not teach you table manners, DiNozzo?" Gibbs scoffed halfheartedly.

The fork with the next pancake shipment stopped halfway and was then completely abandoned on the plate. The way Tony's face was wiped clean from any emotions, followed by a flash of something in his eyes, made Gibbs once again try to study the man in front of him, without much success. Although he had a feeling he wouldn't have noticed before even that much and he doubted if anyone else would've. It felt like he had taken a step further in understanding the man, compared to how it had been in the beginning.

"Our suspect—the widow—is stalking me," Tony finally said.

"What?"

"You know, the blonde one we met before. With big..." Tony cupped his hands in front of his chest like he was holding something.

Gibbs wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer. Afraid that his suspicions would become real. "And how do you know she's stalking you? This is my house."

"It was creepy. I mean, not creepy like Dracula creepy—although who knows—but creepy as in—"

"DiNozzo..." Gibbs was strangely starting to feel like a parent of a kid whose thought pattern seemed to jump from one thing to another. Or maybe owner of a puppy he didn't want to play with. Either way, he found it at times hard to keep up with the young man. If the kid was doing this on purpose...

Seeing the dangerous narrowing of the eyes, then the sudden glare being thrown his way and the now familiar movement of the fingers twitching, Tony bit his tongue to keep himself from smirking. The old man had almost caught him. Maybe he shouldn't enjoy this too much... "Anyway. She was standing outside, staring straight at me like she knew I was here, so I'm pretty positive of the reason why she was here."

The nasty feeling in his gut was back tenfold. Gibbs knew what he would've done if he had been in that situation, but hoped that was not the case with the Detective. "What did you do?"

"I went to talk to her of course and— Don't give me that look and let me finish." Tony had a self-satisfied smirk on his face, which did nothing to reassure Gibbs. "She may be a stalker and possibly our killer, but she certainly isn't the smartest one around, coming to me like that, unless she's only acting dumb. Do you honestly think I could have taken the chance of putting your wife in danger? I didn't save her life just to have her killed now."

"What did she want?"

"She asked me out."

Gibbs gave him a blank look and Tony grinned. "Like on a date. You know, when a boy and girl spend some time together, they go to a movie or a dinner or... It may involve some kissing, holding hands and if you get really lucky... You know. How old were you again?"

Head slap fixed the smartass attitude. For now. Gibbs frowned inwardly at the thought that maybe no head slap in the world could cure that. "I have a daughter who is younger than you. I'm familiar with what it means and I'm not that old. As for this woman... I hope you were smart enough to get rid of her."

"Why would I do that? I said yes. We'll be meeting tomorrow."

Gibbs cursed and slammed the door behind him closed, just so he could show how pissed off he was and he was pretty sure Shannon wouldn't treat him kindly if he decided to break their only TV. "I thought you knew better! You don't _date_ a case!"

Tony didn't say anything and calmly stared at Gibbs, silently waiting for the man to realize it himself. It didn't take long.

" _Oh no_ you won't. You're hurt and in no _undercover_ condition. We don't even know _what_ she is."

Tony glared stubbornly. "Come on. This could be our chance, Gibbs, and you know it. Besides, I already got permission from my boss." He left out the fact that this was just yet another possible way for Bolton to get rid of him. The man was probably dancing around his office. It was strange though that the man was going through all that trouble in order to make his life so much harder. Since so many people kept telling him how he had a death wish, why not just be patient then? Surely with a little time—

"DiNozzo."

"Sorry, you said something?"

"I said, _I don't care_ what your boss agreed on. This is my case."

"Oh, so it's all yours now? Well, that's just too bad then. You're still not my boss." Who would have thought there would come a day when he'd be almost happy that of all people, his boss was Bolton, the little slime bucket.

"Actually, while you are part of this case, I am."

"No, you're not. It's a joint case at most. I swear, the day you try to boss me around—more than usual—is the day when I—"

"You what?"

Shaking his head, Tony suddenly wished for another dose of his pain medication, which wasn't a good sign since his usual way of emptying his bottles of medicine was flushing them down the toilet. All this moving around, even while sitting on bed, was not good. "Think about how perfect this is. Exactly how many of the possible criminals practically throw themselves in our arms?"

"And that's what worries me." Gibbs frowned, wondering why this was bothering him this much. Truth be told, if this were Langer or Blackadder or any other Agent, he would hardly fight back this much. Frankly, even most of the closest people in his life wouldn't get this strong reaction out of him... Guilt. That's what it was. He was still traumatized by the recently returned memories, which was also the reason he hadn't slept last night for more than a few hours; his dreams being plagued by younger him, young Tony, a bottle of bourbon and a gun. And blood.

"Maybe I'm not even asking for your permission. You even think that?"

"Do you _want_ Ducky to have both our heads?"

_Wait till you meet Frost. He'll make Ducky seem like a walk in a park_... Tony swallowed his humorless snicker. "Ducky doesn't have to know. It's not like this is some big ass undercover operation where I'm on loan for the alphabet again."

Gibbs raised his eyebrows and filed the information for later use. Rather, he'd let Abby use her magic and dig out what she could on the Detective who was starting to feel more trouble than it was worth. "Get some rest, DiNozzo. We'll talk more in the morning. I need to get back to work."

Tony's eyes sparkled mischievously. "Ooh. You ditched work? You're gonna be in trouble now?"

"And whose fault do you think that is?" Gibbs snapped and Tony's amused smile turned into a frown. Maybe even with a hint of guilt, but it was hard to tell. "Get some rest. If I find out you've been _getting some fresh air_ again, I'll knock you out myself."

Turning around, Gibbs hid his half-smile just in time for the young man to not see it. His half-smile turned into a full blown smirk when he stood on the other side of the closed door, listening to the grumbling about old Marine bastards among some other things, which he would have bitten someone else's head off for even thinking about him. Walking downstairs, Gibbs was happy to see his wife waiting for him with a steaming cup of hot coffee. When he reached out to take it, Shannon moved it out of his reach.

"Why, you think it's for you?"

"Ah, Shannon. I am the only one who drinks that, as you have so many times told me." Gibbs snatched the cup and drank happily. After the argument, he needed this.

Shannon smiled gently and with that all-knowing look on her face, which Gibbs both loved and hated. "You know who he reminds me of?"

Gibbs scowled at how much like DiNozzo his wife was sounding right then. "You've been spending too much time with him."

"Hardly. I'm afraid the moment I turn my back, he'll be gone."

"Like that'll be a big loss." Gibbs rolled his eyes and was startled at the fist hitting his arm. He smirked at her scowl. "And I can see you've picked up few traits from Abby. Unlike her, you still hit like a girl."

"Keep that up and you'll spend another night down in the basement." Despite the sharpness in her tone, there was twinkling in her eyes and Gibbs only smirked wider. He knew however that he _would_ be sleeping in the basement if she so decided.

"You know, some wives send their husbands on the couch, not basement."

"You're asking for an upgrade?" Shannon challenged and Gibbs clamped his mouth shut, recognizing a threat for what it was. And to tell the truth, he didn't mind the basement all that much anyway.

A kiss and few coffee refills later, he went back to work, where his only Agent was drowning in paperwork and tears of boredom.

* * *

Early in the next morning, Gibbs sneaked in the guest room. Again, he had barely slept all night and it was starting to get on his nerves. With dark circles around his eyes and his short gray hair sticking at all odd directions and the half mad smirk on his face, it made him look like the very picture from your worst nightmare. The smirk was born from the thought of how he'd wake up his young guest so early.

"DiNozzo... Wake up... If you think you're ready for work, you'll be coming with me." Gibbs reached out to shake Tony, but he only felt empty bed. Suddenly worried that the Detective had taken off during the night, Gibbs turned the lights on. Blinking his eyes for a moment against the sudden brightness, it took a moment to fully register what he was looking at. The bed was indeed empty and even the pillows and blankets were gone. A memory from not too long ago came to him and he shook his head. _Surely not_...

Walking in the guest room's bathroom, Gibbs flicked the lights on and stared at the scene in front of him with mixed feelings. He felt both amusement and irritation at the sight. Sleeping in the bathtub could not possibly be good for a wounded man. Let alone someone as tall as DiNozzo. "DiNozzo!"

Startled out of his dream, Tony's head snapped up and he stared at the other man in confusion and obviously still trying to remember where he even was. "Wha—?"

"Really? You _want_ Ducky to throw a fit?"

Blinking his eyes slowly for a long time, Tony seemed to finally be lucid enough. "Nah. He'll understand."

Gibbs frowned, feeling annoyed as he once again realized there was something he didn't know. "If you think you can handle it, get ready. We're going to work."

Tony was suddenly a whole lot more alert and he got out of the bathtub. Rubbing his eyes, he mumbled, "What time is it?"

"Five and thirty." Gibbs turned around, to hide his amusement at the groan. He was hoping for the man to admit defeat.

"In the morning? You know I'm injured, right? I barely slept all night and looking at you, neither did you. You look like crap and that's me being nice. If this was a movie, you'd be the living dead and I'd be running from you, not coming _with_ you."

Gibbs ignored the comments about the way he looked. It was still too early for too many comebacks. "Nothing coffee can't fix. If you think you can't handle it, stay here and go back to sleep. If not, get ready. I won't be waiting. Be ready in fifteen."

Casting a longing look toward his little nest, Tony hurried to get ready. Anything but being bored to death. He didn't even have his movies in here.

Despite what Gibbs had said, he waited those few extra minutes it took for the injured man to get dressed. If Tony noticed it, he never let it show.

Later that morning, Shannon was left with a short note from Gibbs and confusion as she found the forgotten nest in the bathroom.

* * *

"Tony!" Abby nearly threw her arms around the young Detective, and she would have, but he was faster and took several steps back and crossed his arms over his chest.

"What _are_ we doing here so early in the morning, Gibbs?" Tony asked the other man who didn't answer his question.

"Wait here. Abby. Come with me."

She looked surprised, but followed the Agent outside the lab. "What's the secret, Bossman?"

Gibbs smiled a little. "This is a big task, Abby. Might be impossible."

"I'm on it! What is it? It's not something illegal, is it? Not that I wouldn't do it. It just explains why we can't talk about it in front of our Detective. He wouldn't like that, would he?"

"This is about him, Abby. You can't let him know. There's no telling how he will react if he finds out."

Abby swinged nervously on her high heels. She wasn't good at lying. She didn't like lying. Well. She didn't like doing it to people she liked. Everyone else was a fair game. "I can do it, Gibbs."

"Good. He's injured and doesn't know what's good for him so I need you to keep him here. I don't care how. Make sure he's busy or something. Even better if he gets some sleep. But no matter what, do _not_ let him leave. If you think he'll do it anyway, call me."

Abby gasped at the 'injured' part. She had heard he got hurt and saw the security feed of what that SOB Langer had done, but not just hurt, _injured_? As in, blood and hospital, injured? Oh, she _knew_ she should have done something before Gibbs got the chance to do it. "I got it. That's all?"

Gibbs looked amused. "I'm sure you'll find out it's not that simple. One more thing... Do a background check on him. _Deep_ background check. I don't care how useless the information is, I want to know it all."

The previous worry on her face turns into a pleased smile. "I knew it!"

"It's not what you think."

"Of course, Bossman. Whatever you say. But you still owe me a Caf-Pow."

Shaking his head at the lost cause, Gibbs walked back in the lab. There was no use trying to explain it to Abby now. "DiNozzo."

Tony glared at him suspiciously. "Had enough of sharing secrets?"

"I need to see the Director and have a little talk with my Agent. It'll take a while, so wait here and help Abby until then."

"I'm not going to— That's not what I—"

"Actually, I do need some help." Abby smiled innocently and watched with satisfaction as the Detective's resolution slowly grumbled under her own version of the puppy dog eyes. Yep. She still got it. At least until he got to know her, then all bets were off.

"Fine. But only for a little while!"

Couple of hours later and with the aid of painkillers, Tony was wiped out and was snoring softly in the lab with the farting toy as his pillow and sleeping on a mattress, which Abby had made magically appear from somewhere. Smiling softly, she made sure he was indeed sleeping and then sat down to start on the background check. It proved to be a real challenge, but she only took it as a worthy and positive one. She had no idea how wrong she was. There was nothing positive about finally getting the results.

Tony woke up three hours later, surprised that he had actually slept so deeply. It wasn't something he did. Ever. Before he got the chance to worry that maybe he wasn't doing so well as he thought he was, he heard quiet sobbing. Alarmed, he stood up and looked around. Seeing the young goth sitting in front of one of the many monitors, he walked closer. "Abby. What's wrong?"

She looked at him over her shoulder. Her makeup was ruined, with her black mascara all over her face and her eyes red from crying. Before Tony had time to react, she threw her arms around him in a crushing hug, which made him flinch for more than the pain it caused. "Oh, Tony! I'm so sorry."

That was when Tony saw what was on the screen. Staring with white face at the information after information—and even some pictures—about him, he felt tremors start running through him. Was it because of rage or was he simply upset? He had no idea. All he knew was that he had the sudden need to storm out of the Navy Yard and also feeling the urge to strangle one silver-haired bastard.


	19. Pinky Swear

Tony pulled himself free from the death grip and when the still upset goth stepped closer, he snapped, "I don't hug people and I'm _not_ in the mood to start doing it now."

Abby opened her mouth and then closed it again. She didn't know what to say. 'Sorry' was all she could think of and she _had_ apologized... Maybe she should keep saying it until he forgave her.

"Why did you..?" Tony started and then he sighed, sitting down heavily on the chair Abby had occupied only a moment ago.

He tried not to think about the images right there on the bright screen. He caught another glimpse anyway and it sent shivers through his body. He'd stopped looking at himself from the mirror after the first beatings for a good reason. He didn't need to see himself looking like that, ever again. Just knowing, and remembering it, was more than enough. And remember he did, in a frighteningly clear details. If only he could remember all the happy moments just as clearly, then _maybe_ he would be much more stable and happier human being. He would never know the answer, which was yet another painful reminder of how little he could even try to imagine his past as a happy time.

"Who told you can do this? This is my _personal_ information, buried deep for a good reason. It's not something you even need to know about me. It's personal. My life!"

"I didn't know," Abby spoke softly, as if talking to a frightened animal or a young child. "I swear, I had no idea. Gibbs wanted me to do a deep background check on you. If I'd known, I would have never done it, I swear."

He slammed his fist on the desk, a little too close to the monitor, and Abby jumped. "He has no right! I'm not one of his criminals! Or is that what this is all about? He thinks I've done something? If he wants to hang me for something _so_ much, then all he has to do is go to my boss. I'm sure with the two of them, they can cook up something against me. I'm used to it. I can handle it. But _this_?"

"No! Tony, No. That's not it. He does a background check on all people who come to work with him."

"What are you saying?"

"I think— No. I'm pretty sure, even if _he_ doesn't know it yet, that Gibbs wants you to come work in here. With him."

"Not a chance. Especially not now, after this." Tony stood up and started pacing around the room, muttering something. While Abby couldn't be sure what he was saying, more than few times the name ' _Gibbs_ ' and the words ' _bastard_ ' and ' _no right_ ' were heard, clear as day. Oh boy. He really was mad... She flinched when he slammed his fist against the wall. His already hurt one. Third time's the charm they say...

"I promise I won't tell anyone. Not even Gibbs." And to Abby that was a huge promise to make. Massive.

Tony stopped his pacing and simply fell from his feet into a sitting position against the wall. For a man as tall as he was, he could make himself look awfully small with his legs pulled up against his chest. Deciding that it was finally safe enough, Abby joined him, sitting in a similar position next to him and it didn't matter to her that she was wearing a short skirt, which meant that whatever she was wearing underneath was on a full display to anyone coming in the room.

"He's a bastard," Tony finally said. Even if the anger was still bubbling underneath the now almost calm surface, at least he was no longer yelling.

"Yeah. He's famous for being one. Seems to be pretty proud of it too." Abby tried to make it sound like she was joking, but he was barely even listening to her.

"If I hadn't already broken his nose once, I'd do it now."

Abby cringed. She would talk to him about that later, but for now her main concern was Tony and making sure he wasn't going to wreck her lab and himself in the progress. She glanced at the slightly trembling hand he was now holding against his chest.

"He had no right." It was one of those things Tony did not talk about. Not to anyone. Even Frost didn't know. Well, he didn't know the big ugly truth, but the old man obviously was at least suspecting something. Howard and Jeanne had known, but they were both dead.

"I know, Tony, and he won't find out. Not from me. I won't tell."

"You promise?"

She held back her tears at the almost hopeful look on his face. No matter how grown up he now was, all she saw was that little boy from the pictures. "Pinky promise."

Tony stared at the offered pinky and he started laughing. "Pinky promise, Abby? Seriously? How old are we?"

"Come on. Don't tell me you've never done this?"

The smile vanished and Tony had a flash of memory; sitting on a grass with Jeanne, laughing about something and her making him do the 'pinky swear' with her. It had been a beautiful day... Before Abby had a chance to react to his mood change, he hooked his pinky around hers. "If you tell anyone, I'll never speak to you again."

Abby looked worried, but seeing the smirk, she relaxed. "That will have a meaning only if you don't go back."

Tony pulled his hand away and stood up. "I can't even see Gibbs right now without punching him again. Why would I want to stay here? No. I'm perfectly happy where I am now."

"You know, I looked at your other files too. I know that your two years is pretty much a done deal, and you can't be happy there. All those so called small _accidents_ happening to you, which I bet most have not even been written down anywhere. Then there's the big ones. How did you end up in the freezer?" While worried, Abby was honestly curious. His file was not a boring thing to read either and it surely wouldn't be forgotten too soon by anyone reading it.

"I was held hostage by a former cop and I couldn't keep my mouth shut, so he locked me in the freezer. I would have most likely remained there if my big boss hadn't showed up and kicked Bolton off the case." Tony was snickering. Although he'd been like a walking popsicle at the time, it had been a joy to watch Frost yelling at Bolton and tearing him a new one. The only real downside to the whole thing had been his own embarrassment when the old man started yelling at _him,_ for not cooperating with the madman.

Abby was horrified and her imagination made things possibly ten times worse in her head. She stood up, but before she could hug him, Tony jumped back.

"I really don't like hugging. They make me feel uncomfortable. Now that you know about _that_ part of my life, you should understand."

She frowned, looking unhappy. "But hugs are nice. They won't hurt you."

Tony chose to not point out that Abby's version of a hug was anything but gentle. "That's why I don't like them."

"Huh?"

"Where's Gibbs? How long was I asleep anyway?" Tony changed the topic, while Abby was still progressing that new revelation.

"Ah. Gibbs is... I don't know where..."

"That's fine. I'll just find him myself." Tony was already on his way toward the elevator and Abby ran after him.

"Wait! You can't leave!"

"Why not?"

Abby chewed her bottom lip, conflicted by her need to obey her Bossman and wanting to tell. "He... Gibbs... I'm supposed to not let you go anywhere."

"Really? And why would you have to do that?" Tony glared at her and he suddenly understood what the old bastard had done. When Abby didn't answer, Tony turned around and pretty much jumped in the elevator.

"Tony, wait!"

"Later."

Stopping the doors from closing with surprising strength, she spoke fast, "About the case, I almost forgot to tell you. You were right, she was at the crime scene. I found traces of her DNA on the bottle. Obviously she tried to wipe it clean, but my magic was better and she wasn't smart enough. If we get her fingerprints, maybe we can even match that fingerprint on her."

Tony nodded his thanks with a thoughtful look on his face and Abby finally let go of the doors, hoping she had done the right thing. Walking back in her lab, she got rid of the information she had found. It was all she could do. Or maybe she could plan how to kill DiNozzo Senior and hide the body with no evidence. If she'd ever meet the man...

* * *

Gibbs walked in the lab, several hours after leaving the Detective in there. He expected to meet one pissed off man, but he only saw the goth. "Where's DiNozzo?" He looked around, thinking he was hidden somewhere.

"Gibbs!" Abby jumped around, having been in the middle of her work. "Don't sneak up on me!" Seeing the Caf-Pow in his hand, her eyes lit up.

"Where's Tony?" Gibbs asked again, ignoring the puppy dog eyes. Inwardly he was frowning at the lack of makeup on her face. It looked way too clean to be her face.

"Uh... Restroom?" Abby made a face when Gibbs narrowed his eyes. Why did she have to deal with _two_ men who could put such scary looks on their faces?

"Try again."

"He got pretty mad and left hours ago..."

"Abby! I told you to call me if it happens!"

She looked stubborn. "Maybe I didn't want to call you."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was _Abby_ actually refusing to help him? "There was a very good reason why I told you to look after him. The idiot was planning to meet our murder suspect, against my order to not do it. If he went on his own and without letting anyone know..."

Abby's resolution started grumbling. Had she made a terrible mistake? "I... also told him about the DNA match..."

With a sigh, Gibbs ran a hand over his face. First the diary had gone missing and now he had to go looking for one missing Detective. "What about the background check?"

Abby was quiet and stared at her feet. "I don't have it."

"What?" Gibbs stared. Could this day be getting any worse?

She looked up with tears in her eyes. "I don't have it because I got rid of it. I promised Tony to not share it with anyone. Why did you make me do it? I'll never get it out of my head. Those horrible images and those reports. They were all so wrong! And those big eyes, looking so lost and scared..."

"What are you talking about?"

Her voice trembled as she pointed to the door. "Get out. You should've been happy with the information everyone else got. Sometimes it's just best to let things be."

"Abby..."

"I... I don't need Caf-Pow today. I have work to do. Go away." She turned around and put on the music, so if her order didn't get him out, the noise finally did. After a while, she looked around to see that Gibbs was gone. The Caf-Pow was on the floor next to the door. It only then hit her. She had ordered Gibbs out. _Ordered!_ She'd _never_ do such a thing and now... Oh, her Bossman had to be so mad at her.

Instead of being mad at her, Gibbs was frowning all the way to the bullpen, where he sat down behind his desk as he was wondering just what it was that had made Abby so upset. All he had really wanted to know was what kind of person DiNozzo was. Wanted to understand his personality. Wanted to use a shortcut to ' _how to read DiNozzo_ '. Shortcut or just any 'how to get there' help... Gibbs had suddenly this terrible urge to find Tony. Even if it meant another hospital visit for him. At least he had to explain why he'd made Abby do it for him. Abby... Now he had _two_ people he had to try to make a peace with.

His phone rang. Shannon... Better make it three.

Touching his hurt nose, Gibbs stood up and walked in the elevator. Maybe it wasn't too late yet. If anything at all could go well today, then he'd catch up with DiNozzo before the man did anything stupid.


	20. Two Players On A Date

After shopping for new clothes, Tony took a room in a hotel where he would get not only some peace and quiet, but he could also take a shower. As the hot water burned his back, he sighed and leaned his forehead against the tiles in front of him. The burning sensation felt almost like a relief next to his otherwise undesirable situation and life in general.

Looking in the mirror had been a real shock therapy for him and he couldn't wait to no longer look like he'd barely left the hospital. Worst case scenario, he could always play the pity card and act weak, but if there was one thing he hated with passion, it was showing his weakness to anyone. It usually generated two kinds of reactions; people looking down on him or people wanting to smother him with their so called care. He didn't care for either. As much as he liked the motherly Shannon, there was only so much mothering a man like he could take. Usually he got plenty of that from both Frost and Ducky, whenever he met the two men. As for Agent Gibbs, Tony had no idea what to think of him. So far the man had tried to kill him, had a lousy temper, threatened him and whenever Tony thought he saw a glimpse of kindness, it was again turned around into some bastard move.

When he was finished with his shower and back in the room, Tony only then realized he forgot something important. Glancing down at his bandaged chest, he let out a sigh of relief. Thankfully he hadn't gotten it _too_ wet, having mostly focused on cleaning up his face and hair. Of course that still meant his back got wet and now he had to do something about it.

After changing the bandages into new ones, Tony started cutting off the tags from the clothes he bought. Some might think it troubling how he was just as good at taking care of his own wounds as any doctor or a nurse, but for him it was just as natural as changing the clothes. He could do it with one hand if he had to, which was something he had done on several different occasions. Ignoring the memories, which the core reason for those skills brought up, Tony dressed up. Fake date or not, he had to look his part, which meant looking good. Wearing masks and looking good, that's were he was good at. If only he had just the same amount of confidence in his other skills. But when not, one of his masks would be there to fill in where he lacked.

Taking a look at himself from the small bathroom mirror, he made a face at the dark coloring under his eyes. "Well... Can't look any better now, can you, Anthony?"

Thinking for a moment, Tony closed his eyes as he wished he wasn't so used to doing what he was about to do next. Taking out a brand new makeup set, he started doing his skillful work of hiding the signs that many sleepless nights had left on him. He'd rather shoot himself than let anyone see him doing this. If he _ever_ got caught... He didn't want to imagine that, let alone experience it. When he was done, he stared at himself in the mirror and wondered how he should do this. Rachel, the victim's wife, seemed to be the clingy type. Making a face again, Tony smiled at himself and left his hotel room looking confident and sure from the outside.

_Let's get this case wrapped up nice and tight, so I can go back home and never have to worry about 'his' mood swings again..._

* * *

Being the hard task master he was, even when the people didn't work for him, Gibbs had managed to get someone to find out for him where Tony was last seen; someone much more skilled with technology than he'd ever be. For a while before that though, he had tried going through any places he could think of where Tony might be, which wasn't much. Eventually he gave up and called his wife who certainly was not pleased with him.

He now stood behind the door at the hotel, lock picking his way in. Had it been any fancier place, he was sure there would've been at least someone running to him by now, demanding to know what he was doing. Not one to waste more time, he entered the room like it was the most natural thing to do. Distantly he was aware of how ugly this could turn out; remembering Abby's reaction, DiNozzo might never even talk to him again if Gibbs was lucky and as for the worst case scenario, the young Detective might do something much worse than breaking a nose again.

When Gibbs glanced around the small room, it was obvious that no one was in there, which he had already guessed when nobody opened the door when he had actually knocked before opening the door himself. The bathroom was still warm, so it couldn't have been long time since Tony had taken a shower. That and the few items on the bed were the only visible evidence that the Detective had even been in the room. Gibbs could see a shopping bag, the clothes he could faintly remember DiNozzo wearing that morning and a makeup kit.

Makeup kit? Gibbs glanced around the room again, suddenly wondering if he was in a wrong room...

* * *

Meeting Rachel at the restaurant, Tony didn't even have to pretend to be impressed when he saw the way the blonde looked; she certainly didn't look like a wife who had just lost her husband, but more like a woman who was on a hot date. It made him wonder if she really did think it was a good idea to be going out with anyone so soon—that someone being a cop investigating the case—if she really had something to do with her husband's death. Unless she thought that she could deceive him. If he had been the kind of man who could be blinded by a pretty face and hot body, then sure, but his flirting was usually only another facade he put on to fool people.

He knew it was a little risky, but it was a risk he decided to take, so when they were waiting for their food, he decided to bring out the question. "I must admit I was surprised when you asked me out."

"Really?" She smiled. The red lipstick she had on was a little too much for her lips, but it did nothing to take away from her beautiful face. If people had known the truth, that Tony's judgment wasn't affected one bit by the beauty of a woman, most people would not believe it even if told, and so he let his face show just a little bit how he was affected by her, even if it wasn't the truth. She looked pleased.

"I am a cop who is investigating the murder of your husband. My boss won't be happy with me."

"Why?"

"We don't mix work and pleasure." Tony smiled and took a sip of his drink. Paranoid as he was, he had ordered a sealed glass bottle of water and had opened it himself on the table. He had plenty of experience with criminals, and couple of his dates, putting drugs into his drink. At least he'd dated many women, so it wasn't some everyday thing.

"Why not?"

"It's a big no in our work."

She smiled brightly. "So is this like a forbidden romance?"

Since when had their 'relationship', based on nothing but physical attraction at best, become a romance? "I suppose that's true."

"I feel like I'm a heroine in a movie or something." Rachel sighed dramatically and reached over the small table and took his hand in hers. Her hand felt ice cold and the only thing that he could think of was the touch of Death. Oh yeah, the movie Basic Instinct with Michael Douglas; that's the kind of movie he could think of, but he had a feeling that wasn't what she had in mind.

He squeezed her hand softly, before pulling away to pour himself some more water to drink. His gut told him that he shouldn't let his current act move things forward too fast. "Don't get me wrong. I am enjoying my time with you, but why did you ask me out, Rachel? People will start talking if you go out with someone so soon after the death of your husband."

"Let them talk. It's their problem," she hissed under her breath and the sound was filled with so much venom. "You see, my husband and I, we were not that close. Not anymore. The love just... There was no longer that spark we had in the beginning. You know how that is, right?"

Tony smiled, feeling the way the smile formed on his face as he had to think how to make it look natural and genuine, not forgetting his eyes. With the little time he'd had to look into the case and the people involving it so far, he knew that she and their victim had barely been married for a few months. "Right. Sometimes the love between two people just dies. I guess that's what you mean?"

She relaxed and after looking like a poisonous snake in a human form, she was back to her smiling and flirting self. "I knew you would understand."

They talked some more, about things that really held no importance, and then their food was brought on the table and Tony looked away for a moment to thank the waitress. While he wasn't looking, Rachel reached forward and put something in his drink. Turning back, Tony smiled at her and she pretended to be already eating. "It's good. You should try this."

"Maybe later." He nodded and took a sip of his drink, fully aware of her intense stare.


	21. A Plus

"Where is he?" Gibbs growled and the phone in his hand was threatening to break. Few people gave him odd looks, but it took one look from him and they were gone.

_"He should be in there. Somewhere. I think. I'm pretty sure."_

"He better be, Abby!"

 _"Don't go all grumpy on me, mister,"_ Abby muttered, feeling hurt.

Gibbs felt guilty, but not guilty enough to apologize. He was worried and worried Gibbs was not a pleasant company for even those who were used to his usual grumpiness. He'd get her later the biggest Caf-Pow he could find. As for DiNozzo... He wondered if no one had ever taught the kid that his safety came first. If the Detective had been _his_ son or Agent, he'd be in so much trouble. If Gibbs' hair hadn't been completely gray before, then it certainly would be now if he had to spend even one more day like this with DiNozzo around. But first, he had to find him...

"I'll call you back later." Gibbs ended the call before Abby had time to react.

He was standing in front of some fancy restaurant and that's where he finally saw the young Detective he had spent all this time trying to locate. Feeling something between anger and worry, he started to take few angry steps toward Tony, but stopped when he could see him better. At first he'd only seen part of the man, but now that Tony was walking outside the restaurant, it was obvious something was wrong. Tony wasn't alone and he was being supported by someone, while looking like someone who was about to pass out any minute. There was confused look on his face and his head kept falling forward or on the woman's shoulder. For a moment they all seemed to freeze as Rachel finally saw the Agent at the other side of the street. Tony on the other hand seemed to be completely oblivious toward anything happening around him.

It was the sound of the cars driving that finally seemed to snap them back into action. Rachel was in a sudden rush to get Tony in the car waiting for them and Gibbs was swearing as he tried to cross the busy and wide road between them. Of course he knew there was no way he would make it to them in time, but he was never a man to go down without a fight, or in this case, to let their suspect get away with DiNozzo.

By the time Gibbs was on the other side, both the woman and Tony were gone. He barely caught a glimpse of the license plate before the car was gone. Taking out his phone, he ran back to his own car, while calling Abby again. He wasted no time driving in the middle of the suddenly very busy street and he cursed the people who now of all times decided to block his way with their cars.

_"Gibbs, if he's not there then I really don't know—"_

"I need you to do something for me, Abbs."

* * *

Rachel dragged the now barely conscious Detective in the living room and left him there on the couch. While feeling pleased that she had managed to drag the man all the way to her secret 'love nest', she also knew there was not enough time. Even if she didn't think anyone saw them coming here, she was pretty sure the secret apartment would not remain a secret much longer. She didn't have gut feelings, but she was not as stupid as she liked to let men think she was. Her dumb weakling blonde act was her number one way of luring men into her net. It was also the number one reason her victims had so far never talked.

"It's a shame really, Detective." She sighed and knelt down next to the man who frowned at her. He had such a confused and dazed look in his eyes; the same look she had seen far more often than she could remember. "Your boss sticks his nose where he shouldn't. I was really looking forward to our time together and now I must cut it short because of him." She stroked his cheek with her long fingers. Leaning over, she kissed him softly. "I promise to make it as special as I can. Your death will be far more pleasant than his was; no ropes and no strangling. I do like you. Very much."

Tony didn't show any reaction and Rachel left him there, maybe to look for something she could kill him with. To his utter horror it would be something much worse than that.

* * *

It was rather obvious the place was one of those ' _we do our thing and we don't care what you do, if you keep your nose out of our business_ '. It was not a comforting thought. Stopping at the door, Gibbs was suddenly afraid. With all the time wasted on chasing after the car and and his Detective, he couldn't help but fear he was too late. He couldn't really know what the woman's original plan might have been, but in that moment where their eyes met, he had known she would not just let Tony go. Not alive.

If he did hesitate before whether he should knock or just kick the door open, all thoughts were gone the moment he heard a scream coming from inside the room. Then he heard sounds of struggle and things getting knocked over. Breaking his way in and with the gun in his hands, Gibbs rushed toward the noise; making his way to what looked like a living room, he froze at the door, taking in the scene in front of him and the quick rustling of fabric as the naked ass was covered up. It almost made him miss out hearing the sounds of cursing and struggling.

"DiNozzo?"

"Gibbs?" Tony looked up, while at the same time he was trying to keep the struggling woman pinned to the floor and on her stomach. She was like a wildcat and he had to use his entire bodyweight to keep her down.

Seeing that Tony had surprisingly hard time just holding her still and she kept trying to reach that bloody item on the floor, Gibbs was moving again. Not wasting any time, he snapped handcuffs on her wrists and pulled her up from the floor, with Tony on her other side. While Tony looked like he was still drugged and had to focus hard to not let go of her, Gibbs with his strong Marine grip did not give her any chances to escape.

"You're not my type, old man," Rachel snarled, trying to pull herself free.

"Give me one good reason," Gibbs said as he made sure that she could see the gun and she finally stopped struggling.

Rachel scoffed, "Fine! I'll behave, but you have nothing against me. I'll be out faster than you can blink your eyes."

"We'll see about that..." Gibbs muttered. Looking at Tony he worried how quiet he was and how he kept avoiding looking at the older man. Taking out his phone, Gibbs made some quick phone calls before they left the place. One of them being about Rachel's apartment, since it needed to be turned upside down for any possible evidence.

While taking her to his car, he 'accidentally' knocked Rachel's head against the car while pushing her inside. He didn't even blink when she went limp in his hands. "No. Front seat," Gibbs snapped, when Tony was going to walk away. He didn't bother watching if the man was doing as told and went to sit in the driver's seat. However, Tony grimaced and stared, not making a move to get in the car.

"You know I can't. You have to shoot me first."

Gibbs stared at the steering wheel and before he got too far into thinking if he should just knock out the man and toss him next to Rachel, some of his anger left. "Fine. How are you going to get back to your own car? It's a long walk and we wouldn't want you to fall down and crack your head open. Do you even know where we are?"

Shuffling his feet uncomfortably, Tony shoved his hands deep in his jacket's pockets and muttered, "I'll be fine. Not that out of it."

Gibbs hesitated. He didn't feel comfortable leaving him there on his own, but he couldn't walk with him either and with their suspect on his backseat... "Alright, kid. Start walking then. We don't have a whole day."

Biting down the suggestion that what if _he_ would drive the car instead, Tony nodded, feeling relieved. After closing the car door, he started walking. To his surprise he never saw Gibbs speeding away as he normally would. Instead, he soon found the car driving next to him. He had to wonder if the man had ever been driving this slow and for a moment he almost started to worry about Agent Gibbs' mental health. Whatever it was, he still hadn't forgiven the man for what he did.

Gibbs rolled down the window and glanced at the young man who was now sulking for some reason. "What happened?"

"What do you think happened?" Tony snapped.

"DiNozzo... I'm just wondering how you of all people could be so stupid and let yourself be drugged when you should know to be cautious." Gibbs narrowed his eyes as the next thought came to him. "If I find out that you willingly let her..."

Keeping his eyes on the road, Tony shrugged. "It was the only way. Sure, I could've just faked it, but there's no way I could have faked it long enough if she decided to take me somewhere with a car. So I took enough and poured out rest when she wasn't looking. Knocked out or somewhere in between, those are the only ways I could have handled the car ride. And okay, I couldn't be too sure what she put in the drink, but I decided to gamble for a bit. I was lucky enough and by the time we made it to that place I—"

"Are you out of your mind?!"

"It was the only way!"

"It wasn't and you know it! What's the rush that you had to risk your life?!"

"I followed my gut feeling and I wanted to get this case over and done with so I can go back home!"

"Oh, so you much rather run back to people who would encourage your self-destructive ways!"

"I was only thinking about solving the case and at least they don't dig into my life! Not that deep anyway!"

Gibbs flinched. "Look, kid..."

"Don't you _kid_ me, Agent!" Tony snarled. They were both still moving forward and attracting some curious glances as they went and some angry car horns blaring when they made it to the bigger road, since they were still not going any faster than as fast as Tony could walk. "I'm not one of your cases, so you had no right to..!" He smashed his fist against the car in frustration. Unaware that Gibbs would have had his head for it had he been anyone else.

"Abby already chewed me out for it and she refused to let me know what she found."

"And that makes it all so much better." Tony snorted and shoved his fist in his pocket. "I recorded everything from the restaurant to when you smashed her head against the car. I'll be out of your sight soon enough."

Gibbs frowned. He didn't want that. "At least let me make up for my mistakes before you go anywhere."

"Whatever," Tony muttered and hunched his form as he kept walking. They were both silent for a while and by then most cars behind them ended up driving past them, since not once did Gibbs speed up, no matter how much this went against his every instinct.

"Look... Tony..."

Tony barely glanced toward Gibbs, but at least for now most of his anger had left, along with most of the drugs still left in his system. Although his feet felt steadier, he was starting to feel nauseous. Looking at him, Gibbs changed his mind about what he'd been going to say. It was neither the right time nor a place to apologize.

"How did you know she would drug you?"

"Gut feeling," Tony muttered and sighed then, pulling out something from the pocket inside his jacket, along with the cheap recorder he had bought in a rush.

"I was wondering where the diary disappeared to." Gibbs raised his eyebrow as he took the offered items inside the car and dropped them on the driver's seat. Glancing to the backseat, he saw that Rachel was starting to stir. Obviously Tony saw it too since his hand went automatically to where he would normally keep his gun, which wasn't there this time, having left it hidden in the safety of his car. Taking out his backup gun, Gibbs handed it to Tony who took it silently.

After a while Tony spoke again, "It seems our victim found out that his wife was living a double life and since outside appearance means everything to her and he was not going to stay silent... I'm sure you can guess the rest or listen to her rambling on the recorder. Unless the cheap thing wasn't good enough to even catch it all. Then we're screwed and I made a complete fool out of myself for nothing."

Gibbs could see from the corner of his eye how the Detective kept rubbing his butt-cheek every once in a while. Although you couldn't see it on his face, it was getting more and more obvious as Tony kept walking that he was in pain. Then there was also the wound in the chest... If he were his Agent, there would be no more jumping straight into danger when there was a safer option. Even if the safe way would take much longer to solve the case, he didn't care. "What happened in there?"

Tony flinched. "Tomcats."

"What?"

"The movie. Think of the movie Tomcats and the crazy librarian and that's all you need to know. I guess I'm lucky she didn't have her grandma in there with her."

Gibbs had no idea what Tony was talking about, but he would find out later. Well okay, so he had _some_ idea, after seeing the items in that room. Thanks to his work and the things it made him see sometimes, he had recognized the items meant for some rough BDSM games. "I heard your scream."

Tony flinched. Oh yeah. That had been the moment when he'd figured it was time to stop acting like he was still more drugged up than he was. "She was going to choose her favorite before she... And to think that was her only _testing_ things. Thank God she hadn't yet tied me up and stripped me completely naked. Gibbs..."

"What?"

"Let's never mention this to anyone, please. With my already rich history of crazy things happening to me, I really don't need..."

Gibbs hid his smirk at the pleading eyes looking his way. "Sure, kid... As far as I know, she never used any of those items on you."

Tony relaxed and it confused him that he trusted the man's word. Especially after what Gibbs had done to him. "Thanks."

"And, Tony..."

"Hmh?" Tony stopped rubbing his butt-cheek, hoping it wasn't bleeding too much and praying that Ducky would never find out. He did _not_ want to have to explain _this_ to his old friend.

"While I don't accept your way of doing this and we _will_ talk about this later... You did good."


	22. Starting To Finally See It As It Is

Vivian was returning from her break, which she had decided she deserved to have no matter what the boss had told her, and was unpleasantly surprised when she stepped out of the elevator and saw that Detective again; the Detective she had assumed was missing, from the way her boss had behaved all day. It was DiNozzo's fault her day had been ruined by Gibbs' horrible mood. More than usually. The man was sitting behind her now former partner's desk like he owned it.

Tony had a deep frown on his face as he focused doing something on the computer. When Vivian sneaked closer, her eyes widened when she saw him playing Solitaire. Boss would eat him alive! The thought wasn't upsetting; she'd be lying if she would say otherwise. Sitting behind her desk, she kept glancing at the clock every once in a while. She actually _wanted_ Gibbs to return. There was a first time for everything.

"He'll be back as soon as he's done with the suspect," Tony spoke without looking away from the game he was still playing. It startled Vivian, since she'd been pretty sure the man hadn't even noticed her.

"What?"

"Gibbs. He's interrogating our suspect. Don't know why he has to even bother this much when we already have her confession and a whole apartment full of evidence. I still think it's such a shame that the tattoo had nothing to do with our case. It could've been something much more interesting, instead of the usual case of _the wife did it_. You wouldn't believe how many times I've—"

"What are you talking about?" Vivian glared when the man finally looked up and flashed that infuriating megawatt smug grin of his, enough to blind her for a moment. She found herself wondering who his dentist was, but she pushed the thought away as soon as it came.

"Well... While you were drinking your coffee and eating that cake, we solved the case."

Vivian gaped and then the anger came. She stood up and opened her mouth to say a few chosen words, but once again Tony was ahead of her.

"Agent Gibbs." Tony nodded and looked at someone behind her, but she wasn't fooled.

"Yeah right. Just wait when he sees what you're doing on one of our _work_ computers. Trust me; you're a dead man. Where did you even get it? I'm pretty sure there was no Solitaire in it before you got your hands on it."

"Blackadder." It was the voice of the boss. Startled, Vivian turned around.

"Gibbs! Boss, he—"

"You done yet?" Gibbs turned to look at Tony who was leaning back on the chair and looking relaxed, even though in reality it had to really hurt to be sitting right now. 

"Just need to print it out." Tony made a few clicks with the mouse and soon after that they could hear the printer working. When she looked closer, Vivian didn't see any games on the screen, but some open files instead. "You were saying something, Viv?" Tony chuckled as he stood up and got the papers for Gibbs.

Gibbs barely even glanced what was written and added it among the other files that were finished and meant to be sent forward.

"You didn't even read it. Bad eyesight?" Tony bit his tongue at the glare he got. It had been a guess after he'd seen a few times the Agent squinting his eyes and holding files and such as far from himself as he could when he had to read something. With the reaction he got, Tony had obviously hit a sore point.

"I'm sure it's good," Gibbs muttered and Vivian stared, knowing how very unlike himself the boss was acting again. If _she_ had been the one giving the file...

"You're taking my word for it?" Tony made the question sound more like a joke, but the blank stare he got made the nervous grin falter. "Seriously?"

"The case is closed and you need to see Ducky." Plus it would be the perfect punishment for the kid to let him deal with Ducky the mother hen. Pissed off mother hen. Oh yeah, Ducky could be scary when he wanted to be.

"What? Gibbs, no. You promised."

"Not gonna tell him how it happened."

"You know he's going to draw his own conclusions. He'll know." Tony huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. He may not have said it out loud, but his body language spoke loud; he was _not_ going! The man had no right to order him around like... Like he had the right.

"Come on, DiNozzo. Ducky won't tell anyone, even if he does figure it out. Besides, it's Ducky or hospital. Take your pick." And Gibbs was positive that Ducky would also look over the chest wound, which was something that had him worried, if he was willing to admit it.

"It's humiliating," Tony mumbled, with a faint tint of red coloring his face. Gibbs simply shook his head and walked closer and with his hand on the young man's back, he pushed him toward the elevator. "I really, really hate you right now. And we still haven't really talked about what _you_ did either!" Tony called out, just before the doors closed.

Vivian stared when her boss rolled his eyes before sitting behind his desk. She flinched, when Gibbs grumbled at her, "Don't you have work to do?"

"But you just said the case is closed. And why was I not informed earlier? I'm still part of this team." She hesitated. "Am I?"

"Blackadder..." Gibbs pinched the bridge of his nose. "There's always cold cases. Always. Make yourself useful. You were not informed because it wasn't necessary and you haven't been that useful during our last two cases; you and Langer both. You're lucky nothing more serious happened. I have no idea how you two wormed your way into my team, but you can bet your ass that one more mistake and you will follow him. To tell the truth, even that probie was more promising. He simply lacked some backbone."

Vivian flinched at the brutal honesty. At the mention of her former partner, she had a flashback from before that day, when Langer had returned to get rest of his things. During the whole time the man had been so full of such anger and arrogance that it had shocked her. Before the incident where he attacked DiNozzo, she'd never known just how bad and ugly his temper was. For that reason, she was secretly glad he was gone. At least there was something good about having DiNozzo here. For a moment she wondered if she should tell the boss about Langer's last visit, but there was that dark mood surrounding him again...

"Can I ask you a question?" she asked. Gibbs gave her a blank stare and she swallowed. "You're going to hire that Detective, aren't you?"

He kept staring, not revealing how startled he was. Why did everyone keep asking him that or assuming he had already decided to do it? It _was_ true that despite the bad start and not that painless ending either, the two of them worked pretty well together, for being practically strangers still. Even when they didn't get along. He could only imagine how well they would work if they worked together much longer. Plus, the kid didn't seem to fear him and for some reason, Gibbs wasn't as annoyed by that as he should have been. For Gibbs, this was a rarity. Anomaly. Impossible situation. The only real issue was DiNozzo's lack of self-preservation.

Meanwhile, instead of going to see Ducky, Tony stepped inside the lab where the music was loud as it normally was. He smiled, seeing Abby doing her work in her usual way, which included a few cartwheels. On the desk she had the biggest possible Caf-Pow, the usual 'Gibbs apology', although she had long ago forgiven her Bossman. She couldn't be mad at him for too long anyway. It simply was not possible. Not with Gibbs. Not her.

She smiled brightly when she noticed she was no longer alone in the room. "Tonyyy! You're finally here!" Turning off the music she ran toward him, to give him a hug, but he took several steps back and she felt annoyed that he reacted so fast. She had planned this all day, testing how fast she could move and... "It's just one hug. I need my hug fix."

"You have Gibbs for that."

"Gibbs doesn't hug much and he was still a little grumpy when he came to see me."

"And I should?" When her answer was to hold out her arms and shake herself invitingly, he shook his head, smiling slightly. "Nice try, but it's still a no. I only came to see what you're doing. The case is closed."

"Oh. That means..."

"My time here is up. Figured this would be my last chance to see you, before they kick me out." Tony smirked.

Abby shook her head. "Gibbs wouldn't let that happen."

Tony raised his eyebrows, but didn't care enough to want to know. Soon he'd be gone and none of those things mattered anymore. "I also wanted to thank you for not telling Gibbs what you... You know."

"I would never betray your trust like that. It's your story to tell and I swear if I had known, I would have _never_..."

"Abby. Relax. I believe you."

"You're really leaving?" Abby was upset. Why hadn't Bossman made his move yet? Surely he knew it would soon be too late. Even the official and known information about Tony was too telling. Then there were all those times working undercover... After reading just a little bit of how he got hurt, how often and with no one watching his six. And the way he just ran into dangerous situations, first in line, when he didn't even have to, like one of those people who either were suicidal or simply did not care if they would live or die. Reading all that, she knew they _had_ to keep him here, so she could wrap him up in a cotton, bubble wrap and...

"Obviously."

"You _can't_ go. At least wait until my work is done and go with me for a drink?" She put on her best pout. Maybe she should just kidnap him and lock him up nice and safe. With the images of the tiny and hurt Tony now forever in her memory, she had to fight back the urge to try to hug him again. Part of her wished she'd never digged so deep, but now that she knew, she also wouldn't want to not know it. As much as the knowledge was upsetting her, it had to hurt Tony so much more.

Tony chuckled softly. "Alright. _One_ drink. I do need to drive."

Before Abby could cheer, Tony's phone started ringing. It was his mistake not checking who was calling before answering the call. Had he looked, he would've just ignored it; especially since he was already looking forward to sleeping in his own bed. Somehow sleeping in a bathtub in his current condition didn't feel like a good idea. Man, he was not looking forward to that drive back home in his car... Maybe he should buy a pillow to sit on. At least the wound wasn't as bad as it felt like; after going to the restroom earlier, the first thing he did was using a small hand mirror to see himself that the wound didn't look so bad that he would have to show it to Ducky.

"DiNozzo," Tony answered the phone calmly, but then the look on his face darkened instantly and the tone of his voice with it. "Look, _boss_ , I am still technically on leave. If the big boss finds out you've tried to kill your Detective with work again, Frost will slaughter you. Guts and everything. You sure you're willing to risk that?"

While Abby couldn't hear the response, she was pretty sure it wasn't good since the next thing she knew, he was already hanging up and glaring angrily at the phone, looking like he was between throwing it against the wall or keeping it. Since it was one of his many new phones in the last year, he took a deep breath and put it away. "How bad?" she asked carefully.

Tony smiled tightly. "Bad enough. I'm afraid our drinks will have to wait. Work calls. It's a big one and they need every man who is available or not."

"But you're hurt! Let the others do the hard labor for once. You can hide it all you want, but I know Gibbs doesn't buy your tough guy act. And just wait till Ducky gets his hands on you... I like this boss of yours less and less, the more I know about him. I think I might hate him a little. Okay, more than a little; he sounds horrible. If you ever need to hide his body, I'll be glad to help."

_Ducky_... Tony flinched inwardly and then smiled weakly at the 'offer'. Stepping forward and before Abby knew what happened, Tony hugged her awkwardly, like he wasn't sure what he was doing or where and how to put his arms. "You ever visit Baltimore, give me a call. I'm sure you have my number somewhere."

Then he was gone, never giving her a chance to hug him back and leaving her holding back tears; happy or sad, she wasn't sure. "And now I _really_ want to hug him..."

Biting her bottom lip, Abby glanced at the door as if to make sure Tony was really gone, and then at the computer, which was almost like calling for her. Singing really. Tempting her with sweet words. "Oh, I really shouldn't. I really, really shouldn't." Making sure she could see the door, she sat down behind the computer and hesitating once more, she started typing furiously. While she had promised to not dig out things about Tony again, he hadn't said anything about his boss so it should be okay. Right..?


	23. Breaking In

_"You have to get him back, Gibbs! I think his boss is literally trying to kill him with work!"_

Gibbs held the steering wheel tightly as he kept his eyes focused on the road; with the heavy rain and late night, it was hard to see it. His mind kept going back to the moment when Abby stormed in the bullpen, looking so upset he had almost asked who he would have to kill for her. That was when he found out DiNozzo had never gone to see Ducky, but for now that was least of his worries.

Abby for some reason had done her research on Tony's boss, this Bolton guy, but it was only after she spoke to Tony's former partner that she found out what was going on. While there was no hard evidence, almost everyone in Baltimore PD knew the truth. Among other dangerous situations, Tony was being used for undercover gigs, case after case, with no real break in between and often with no backup. Bolton had something personal against the young Detective and they had been at each other's throats since day one. No one knew the reason and the two of them didn't share the information, so it was no surprise there were all kinds of wild guesses going around.

It surprised Gibbs how hurt he felt that DiNozzo didn't trust him with his problems. Especially when it was something this big. Sure, he knew he hadn't earned that trust yet and with his past deeds, and now the newest mistake, the young man had every right to not tell him anything at all. He had a feeling that Shannon would not be very forgiving either if she ever found out what a fool her husband had been.

Speaking of his wife... Gibbs thought Shannon would be upset when she called him, as she usually did when he wasn't home on time and never even bothered to call about it when he was in the middle of a case. Instead, when he explained the situation, she was the one who told him to race after the Detective.

Holding back another yawn, Gibbs wished he would've at least brought some coffee with him. While driving, he suddenly remembered that only Abby and his wife knew where he was. Tom was not going to be happy and Blackadder... Well, she would survive. Hopefully no new cases would be given to them before he was back.

* * *

By the time he made it to his apartment, Tony was so tired he might have just as well slept in his car and only the mental image of his comfortable bed gave him enough strength to leave the car. He couldn't even remember the last time he got a proper full night of sleep, with no stress and no waking up every fifteen minutes or so.

Last couple of years had been nothing but work. Normally he wouldn't mind, since it kept his mind off the things he didn't need to think about and he did enjoy working, but now it was only work and forced undercover jobs with no rest in between and no proper time to strip off whatever persona he'd been wearing at the time. While working, Tony could forget for a moment how exhausted he was, but as soon as he was alone and had no cases to think about, he could feel he was not that far from crashing completely.

For a moment Tony again thought about calling Frost, to let the man get him out of this situation, but he changed his mind. He was already getting enough grief for being ' _a l_ _ittle favorite_ ' and ' _spoiled rich brat who bought his Detective badge_ '. No, he had to save that phone call for more important and much later use. Besides, he was ready to move on again. One more case and that was it. He had done it before and he could do it again. Fresh start. Hopefully in a place where no one would care about his background or try to be friends with him.

Stopping at his door, Tony froze. There were signs of a forced entry. His cop instincts taking over and with a gun in his hand, he pushed the door open and stepped inside.

Once he had made sure there wasn't anyone in the apartment, he took in the mess that used to be his living room. Seeing the destroyed couch, which he had really loved, and what used to be his movie collection, Tony winced. It looked like anything that could be destroyed, had been destroyed. He sighed and wondered if his day could get any worse... Of course it could, but he silently prayed it wouldn't. Whoever had done this, was obviously mad at him. He noticed the pieces of torn paper near his feet. It was the copy of one of his diplomas that had hung on his wall.

Tony was relieved to find his backup weapon still safely hidden away. He slipped it in his bag, which he'd taken with him from the car. It was now the only thing that wasn't a broken mess in the apartment, including the resident of the place. Thankfully, other than the weapon, he didn't keep anything valuable at home. It was a lesson he had learned the hard way in the past, to not keep valuables where anyone could find them and not keep everything he owned in one place.

Walking to the couch, Tony carefully sat down on it, studying the scene as much as his tired mind allowed him. It looked like the work of a one man. Man full of anger. People who had something worth to steal didn't live in this area, so there was no good reason for a thief to break in, and only few people knew where he lived. Even his mail went to another address. He rarely brought anyone to his place, because trouble liked to follow him and his work certainly didn't help. With all pieces of information coming together and how personal this seemed to be and since he had made sure Bolton didn't know where he lived, Tony could only think of one person; someone who had recently done some level of background check on him. Plus, he could smell that familiar cologne in the room. "Langer better hope I don't get my hands on him..."

Taking out his phone, Tony pondered who he should call. Bolton would make sure no one in Baltimore PD would help. Frost would start a World War if he thought it would help. Gibbs? No, definitely not him. Chewing his bottom lip in frustration, Tony dialed the only number he could think of. The phone number he had accidentally heard one of the agents at the Navy Yard give to someone else. Nosy as he was, he had saved it in his memory.

"Hi. This is Detective DiNozzo from Baltimore. You don't know me, but... You do..? Oh, right, _that_ happened... No, I'm fine... Yes. Really. Can I ask you to do me a favor? Tell Abby Sciu—... Yes, Abby. Tell her to call me as soon as she can... She's still at work..? You will? Thanks, man... Okay, Chris it is."

Tony had barely finished the call a few minutes ago, when his phone was ringing. He didn't know the number, so he answered cautiously, "Abby?"

_"Tony! You called me. Well not me, but I didn't think you would call me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm happy that you're calling me. I just didn't think you would do it. I was actually worried since you didn't have my number and... But you have Gibbs' number, don't you? You didn't have to call Pacci. Why do you even have his number?"_

He sighed in relief at the familiar voice. There was always a chance Bolton was using someone else's phone since the man knew he lately didn't always pick up his calls. Like when he was in the hospital, _passed out_ , after the stake incident. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything?"

_"Oh, you never could, handsome."_

"Did you just call me—?"

_"Handsome. So what's up?"_

Chuckling softly, Tony was surprised how much better he already felt after hearing a friendly voice. "I have a problem."

_"Oh no. Is it your boss? Say the word and I'll be on my way. Don't touch the body if you can avoid it."_

"Wait, what? Abby... He's not dead."

_"Well, that's too bad,"_ she muttered and Tony found himself chuckling again.

"I have a different kind of problem... Someone broke into my home and destroyed everything. Made sure nothing can be saved. I'm actually surprised he didn't piss on my things on top of destroying the place." Tony made a mental note to check that. "I guess my neighbors were not home during that time either or I would have found out sooner since there's no way this was some quiet incident. It has _personal_ written all over it."

Abby gasped in shock. _"Are you alright?!"_

"I'm fine. It's my apartment that's not alright. I have an idea who's behind this, but not sure what to do right now. Bolton would make sure to give me as much trouble as he can and the big boss would completely overreact."

_"Say no more. Do you want me to call Gibbs?"_

"Uh... Actually... I was kind of hoping..." He could hear Abby breathing in the phone, but she didn't say anything. "Alright. Spit it out."

_"Gibbs is already on his way. He kind of left as soon as he found out you left. He's really worried, you know."_

"Abby..."

_"Please, Tony! Listen to me. I know you're still mad at Gibbs, but you can trust him to watch your six. And he's sorry. Like_ really _sorry. For Gibbs that's a big thing because he doesn't do sorry. Let him help. I will cry if you get hurt again. Let him help you or I will come there myself and I'll bring Ducky with me."_

She didn't even know half of what Gibbs had done... Tony was still annoyed. Annoyed and oddly touched by her concern. "Fine. I'll... I'll call him."

_"Oh, thank you!"_

"I'll call you back later."

_"You better! Now, call Gibbs. Meanwhile, stay out of trouble, mister,"_ she commanded and ended the call.

Chewing his lips, Tony finally dialed the number from his memory. It didn't take long for the now familiar, and oddly calming, voice to answer. "Gibbs. I need some help."


	24. Where The Fire Meets

With coffee for two in his hands, Gibbs made it to Tony's apartment. He frowned when he saw the door wasn't locked. Although he had known what he would see inside, he was still shocked and then furious that someone had done this. A home was meant to be a sanctuary, even if just for a while.

"DiNozzo?" Moving forward, Gibbs found the Detective asleep on what used to be a couch. "DiNozzo. Wake up." Gibbs was about to nudge the sleeping man with his knee, but in one swift movement Tony was suddenly staring at him with wide eyes and aiming a weapon toward him. Very trigger friendly still. At least he studied the threat first before shooting. Either way, Gibbs would have to start becoming more careful about waking the man. "You awake now?"

"Please, please don't do that..." Tony muttered and put the gun away. He saw from the window that it had to be in the middle of the night. "What time is it?"

"1 AM."

"How did you get in?"

"The door was open." Gibbs glared. He was not happy with such carelessness. What if the bad guy had returned while the man was asleep? He could have very well ended up finding a dead body, on top of everything else. He didn't need that image in his head now. Especially so soon after Rachel, the closet dominatrix.

Tony sat up properly and he glanced longingly toward the huge mugs of coffee Gibbs was holding. It had not been the original plan, much less a consideration, but Gibbs gave one of them to Tony. "Thanks..." Tony took a generous sip, nearly spitting it out when he tasted it. Gibbs sat down next to him. He was impressed by how despite the shudders, Tony kept drinking. Most people gave up after the first sip and some after just smelling it. Then again the kid looked like he needed either this or sleep, badly.

"What happened?" Gibbs asked, indicating at the mess around them.

"Don't know. I came home and found the place like this. Although, I do have a very short list of people who could have done this. One name actually, but I could be wrong. Could be just a coincidence."

"There is no such thing as coincidence. Rule 39."

"Do you have rules for everything?" Tony asked with honest curiosity.

"Who was it?"

Tony hesitated to answer. Although Gibbs hadn't let his Agent get away without punishment after the attack, he didn't know if Gibbs would believe that this was Langer's doing.

"Who did this?"

"Langer. But I could still be wrong. It's just a feeling."

Gibbs muttered a curse. "I'm sorry."

"What?"

"When I fired him, I also threatened him."

_Threatened with what? Curious_... Tony shrugged. "He obviously has some serious anger issues. Sooner or later it would have come out anyway."

Gibbs shook his head, but didn't add anything. "You call anyone yet?"

"You're kidding right? What do you think would happen if I did that, Gibbs? My boss will find out and then he and his followers will do nothing and make sure others follow their lead. I don't know how much you know about what's going on between me and Bolton, but it's not pretty. We met when I was just a kid. He made a mistake as a young cop and needed his daddy's help or he would have never made it to where he is today. He blames me and has decided to make my life as miserable as he possibly can."

Tony knew what Gibbs was thinking, just from the look on his face; that deep frown, which made the man look even older.

"Don't worry about it too much. I have just one last case and then I'll be gone. I know where I will end up if I stay." In a body bag. That was the only possible outcome he could see, but he wasn't going to say that out loud. What Gibbs didn't know, he didn't need to know.

"Alright then." Gibbs nodded and as he stood up, he took out his phone.

"Alright?"

"I'll call someone else."

Tony narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Who?"

Gibbs made a face, but in his very own special and irritated Gibbs way. "FBI."

"Oh." Tony watched as Gibbs made his way to the kitchen where he called the FBI Agent Tobias Fornell.

Tony finished drinking his coffee and felt finally alert enough to stand up. He wasn't sure if his sleeping had been just that or if he had actually passed out because of the exhaustion. DiNozzos didn't pass out, so he chose to believe it was the former. Stretching his stiff hands above his head, he flinched, which he did every time he somehow managed to forget he was still healing. At least his ass felt numb, but that could have something to do with the long car drive.

"I knew you'd show up if I was patient enough."

Hearing the sudden voice coming from the door, Tony turned around, while his hand went automatically to where his gun was.

"Don't even think about it, DiNozzo. You have _no_ idea how happy I would be to put a bullet in your smartass brains."

"Look, Brent. This isn't how you want to end things. If not for me, then for you."

"Shut up! You don't know what I want!" Langer took a deep calming breath. "Take your gun and drop it on the floor. Slowly. Don't even try doing anything stupid or this will be over much faster than neither of us wants."

Tony did as told, but he kept his eyes on Langer; having already been at the receiving end of the former Agent's temper, he didn't want any surprises if he could avoid it. Knowing that Gibbs must have heard them by now, he tried to buy some time. "Why are you doing this? You already destroyed my apartment. Isn't that enough?"

Langer snarled softly, "Enough? Do you have any idea what you've done to me? Because of you, I was fired. Because of you, my _entire career_ in a law enforcement is gone. All because of some _rich kid_ , born with a silver spoon in his mouth, who just _has_ to ruin everything for people like me who had to work hard to become someone in a world where money and connections matter more than anything else."

"You're wrong... I know what you think of me, but I swear I have nothing to do with my father and certainly not his money. He disowned me when I was a kid. Kicked me out of home when I was twelve. No money and on the streets. Alone. I certainly didn't have too many options to choose from. Like you, I too had to work hard for everything."

"Save your sob stories for someone who cares, DiNozzo!"

Langer held his gun more firmly and he walked closer. "You have your car keys with you? Give them to me. Now let's get moving and no funny business _or else_..."

Just as Tony was starting to wonder where Gibbs was, they finally heard and then saw him as the Agent stepped in the room with his own weapon out, which was aimed at Langer with a steady hand. "Put it down, Langer."

"Gibbs?" Langer looked surprised and then anger colored his features again and he looked at Tony. "Why is _he_ here?!"

"Well, it's because _someone_ decided to trash up my apartment." Tony shrugged, only to succeed with that by having Langer shoving the weapon against his neck.

"Langer!" Gibbs growled and only then did Tony realize that the man was angry. No, that wasn't it. The older man was filled with raw fury, which confused Tony.

"Back off, Gibbs!" was Langer's only response as he started slowly backing away from the room, using Tony as his human shield, but Gibbs followed them. The way his jaw kept moving, was telling just how hard the Agent was clenching his teeth together. That would surely hurt later, Tony mused. "I said, back off!" Langer yelled and then suddenly, before anyone knew what was happening, he moved his gun and fired.

"Gibbs!"


	25. Wrecking My Memories

By the time the gunshot was heard, the neighbors had started to wake up and were now coming outside to see what all the commotion was about. When they saw the weapon and the madman holding it, they fled back inside. Other than one foolhardy Detective, none of the people living there were stupid enough to risk getting shot.

Meanwhile the Detective in question had used this chance to twist himself free. With swift movements, Tony ruthlessly slammed the man's head against the wall several times, until Langer was no longer moving. Letting the bleeding man fall down, he took the gun with him and ran to Gibbs who was now sitting up, holding his left shoulder. "You alright?"

"Just a flesh wound," Gibbs muttered and glared when Tony grabbed his arm and looked at the wound, acting like he didn't even notice the death glare being thrown his way. If _he_ would rather bleed to death than go to a hospital to be fixed up, then Gibbs simply was unwilling to admit when he was hurt. Also, who would like hospitals? At the end of the day, they both were unwilling to show weakness.

"Yeah, but you're still bleeding."

"It's what flesh wounds tend to do," Gibbs said and watched with interest when Tony pulled from his pocket some clean gauze and used it on Gibbs' wound. One could only wonder what else he was hiding in the pockets.

"I don't carry things like this with me everywhere. You just happened to be lucky that today I did," Tony answered the question Gibbs didn't ask.

Trying to move the focus away from his small wound, Gibbs touched Tony's chest with his finger, which caused the man to hiss and finally back off. Gibbs had a challenging look on his face when he glared again. "How are _you_ doing? All that twisting and moving around couldn't do you any good."

Tony rubbed his chest. "Well, you know what they say; _what doesn't kill you..._ No offense, but your former Agent only brings me bad luck."

"You think?"

Shaking his head, Tony stood up. "Speaking of him. What we do to him?"

Gibbs took the offered hand and let the younger man pull him up. "Someone will be here soon. If not the FBI, then the police."

Tony shook his head again with a sigh and walked back to Langer. "You know. I'm a little unsure if he was a school bully who was jealous of the other kids or if he was the one being bullied by the rich kids. Unless it was both; bullied kid who became a bully himself."

"Don't bother your head with that, DiNozzo." Gibbs was going to add something more, but then Langer suddenly moved and Tony found himself in a chokehold. "Tony!"

"And he's... obviously got a hard head..." Tony gasped and winced when Langer slowly stood to his feet, keeping Tony as a shield again, which was a wise move since Gibbs was looking very happy to pull the trigger of his own gun. Tony cursed that he hadn't just kicked the weapon away, but took it with him instead so Langer was now able to take it back. A chokehold and a gun to his head; he really did attract this type of people and situations, didn't he?

"Let him go, Langer. Let him go before you get in a lot more trouble."

"You're one to talk, _boss_ ; the almighty Gibbs who uses whatever means possible to achieve his goals and God help anyone stepping in his way. Now, if someone else would do the same... I'm afraid my respect for you died a long time ago. So none of your little speeches or threats move me."

"You're willing to leave this place in a body bag? Because that's the only way I see this ending for you."

"I told you, your threats don't work, Gibbs."

Tony gasped for his breath and kept trying to pull himself free. "Don't think... that's a threat..."

"Shut up!"

Then they heard it. That sweet sound. Police cars. It was a risky situation, since the former Agent might do pretty much anything; kill or run for it. Langer chose the latter and pulling his human shield with him, he quickly made it outside the building where the cops were getting out of their cars. They looked alarmed when they realized they knew the hostage. Tony was distantly aware that there were no detectives, which was good since he got along so much better with these than the fellow detectives who might just as well 'accidentally' shoot him in the progress.

Gibbs kept following them. "Let him go, Langer!"

Langer realized he was surrounded by several cops and his former boss. All looking way too happy for an excuse to put a bullet in him. He barely even realized his head was in pain and still bleeding. Holding Tony the human shield tighter against his chest, he whispered harshly in the young man's ear, "Your car. Where's your car?"

Blinking away the black spots dancing in front of his eyes, Tony thought for a moment about giving a wrong direction, but realized that the risk wasn't worth it so he gave the right one. He locked his eyes with Gibbs for a moment. Once he got the attention, he looked down and then back to Gibbs. The moment of confusion changed into understanding and the older man nodded, hoping that he _did_ indeed understand the message. Holding Tony close, Langer started backing away toward the car, while Gibbs kept following closely. Tony however slowly dropped his hands from Langer's arm, which was holding him in the tight chokehold, and moved them to his belt where he kept his belt knife. He was grateful Langer hadn't recognized it for what it was.

Langer took the keys in his hand holding the gun as they stopped next to the car. For a moment his focus was at the car door he was unlocking. "You know, I planned to make this ride much more fun for us, but looks like it's going to be a little different."

Tony locked his eyes with Gibbs again, with question in his eyes. Removing his other hand from the gun he was holding, Gibbs nodded with clenched teeth and slowly moved closer. As soon as Tony stabbed the arm holding him with his belt knife and Langer let go screaming, Gibbs jumped forward and pulled Tony behind himself. Realizing that he had lost his life insurance and that the cops no longer had a reason to hold back either, Langer jumped in the car the moment the first gun went off. It seemed luck was on his side again when he managed to start the car after the first try and nearly ran over a cop when he drove away.

Tony hissed when his car took the first bullet. "I'll kill him! I swear I'll kill him! He's dead!"

Gibbs gave him a look of sympathy before running to his own car and jumped in. The car was already moving when the door to the passenger seat opened and one very pale Detective sat down. "DiNozzo?" To say Gibbs was surprised, would be an understatement.

"Just drive! The others are already after him! I'm not going to let them have the fun of throwing him on the backseat of a police car!"

Gibbs didn't need more convincing, but by the time he was speeding behind the police cars chasing after Langer, he had glanced toward Tony after every sudden turn. It turned out his concern was not for nothing; ten minutes later it looked like the Detective was ready to go into a full-blown panic attack. And he wasn't breathing. "DiNozzo! You've got to breathe, kid."

Tony opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out. He could see the black spots dancing and now they were mixing together with the flashbacks taunting him. It felt like his mind was swimming elsewhere and he barely even heard Gibbs' voice.

"Take deep breaths. Deep and slow breaths. Tony! Listen to me! Deep breaths. Focus your thoughts on the SOB whose ass is about to get burned. Deep breaths. You're not in there. It's here and now. Focus. I know you can do it. Keep breathing."

"I... I got it..." Tony whispered and although his fingers were digging holes in the seat and his deep breathing was shaky and uneven at best, he eventually managed to calm down enough and push back the flashbacks attacking his mind. For a while anyway... To say it was easy, would have been a lie. To say it was hard, would have been making light of the situation.

"Attaboy. Keep breathing... Sharp turn," Gibbs warned and as soon as the words left his mouth, the car took a sharp turn to the left.

Tony closed his eyes, but since it only made keeping the flashbacks under control even harder, he opened them. "Left... Go to left again," he mumbled. Afterwards Gibbs glanced toward him with question in his eyes, but Tony shrugged. By now his hair was glued to his face and he was sweating hard as if it were hot in the car. "Shortcut."

While the drive was a personal hell for Tony, he was surprised he'd made it this far without jumping out of the speeding car or losing his control the way he usually did. Maybe it was because until now no other driver had been both calm and understanding with him and his fears, which was why he had finally given up even trying. His partners at work always thought he had an attitude problem or something when he refused to let them drive the car. It had brought him a whole bunch of problems, but nothing too serious, thanks to Frost. Until he came to Baltimore of course. It was ironic that it was with Gibbs of all people that he now had made it this far. The man with serious temper issues and whose driving style was pure horror for someone like him.

"Right... Then left again," Tony kept muttering the directions and Gibbs found it surprising that he wasn't even questioning it, but just kept driving with the directions. After all, the young man could easily mess up if he wasn't even thinking straight. Having already chosen the shortcut, it was now too late to regret it. "That's strange. We should see him again by now. Especially with the police cars following him. Unless..."

"Unless?"

"Turn right and keep driving."

Another sharp turn and a moment later, Tony gasped. "Oh no. No, no, no... They didn't..! He didn't..!"

They finally saw the reason why they hadn't seen Langer. The car—Tony's car—looked like a complete wreck. It looked like it had turned over at least twice and then back on the wheels. As if that wasn't enough, both the back and front of the car had been destroyed. The beauty had turned into a beast; dead beast, if the looks didn't deceive. Stopping the car at the scene, they saw that Langer looked surprisingly unharmed. There was just a small bleeding wound in his forehead, added to the previous head wound, but that was it. Unless he had cracked his ribs or something, but he didn't seem to be in pain. Instead he looked defeated, being surrounded by the cops and no way out. One of them was walking slowly toward him with handcuffs.

"DiNozzo!" Gibbs watched as Tony was already outside the car and running toward Langer. Knowing how much the chest wound still had to be weakening his normal strength, the punch he threw at Langer's face was impressive, throwing the ex-Agent on the ground with a broken nose.

"You—!" Tony hissed and Gibbs joined them when two of the cops were holding the Detective back from throwing another punch. "Let me go, Mathias! A big man like he can handle a few more punches!"

"I've got this," Gibbs told them and not even waiting for their agreement, he pulled Tony away. "Take the SOB to somewhere where the FBI will have an easy access to him. They're already on their way to get him. Tobias Fornell is the guy in charge. Be careful. He's in a bad mood." Bad meaning foul, like the foul language that greeted Gibbs when he had called the man. The mention of the FBI got plenty of unhappy muttering from the cops and Gibbs found himself smirking at it. With one last death glare toward Langer, who wasn't even looking at them, Gibbs turned his attention to Tony and forced him to walk back to the other car.

"So," Gibbs said once they were sitting inside his car again, watching as Langer was taken away in the police car.

"That car..." Tony's voice cracked. "I bought it with someone. I didn't know that much about cars back then so he... Uh... He made sure I chose the best one and we fixed it together."

"Must be someone special then. That was some pretty impressive punch. I think everyone heard it when you broke his nose."

"Yeah, he was," Tony agreed softly, completely ignoring the 'it was impressive' speech. Gibbs flinched at the past tense, realizing that whoever that someone was, had to be dead or gone from the man's life some other way. Seeing how much this affected DiNozzo, the person was most likely dead. "It was the last thing I have of him."

"Tony..."

Tony laughed weakly. "I know it's just a car, but... It's..."

"But it's not just a car."

"It's not just a car."

The men were silent for a moment and by then the cops were gone and Langer with them. Both stared at the wrecked car.

"Gibbs. Just in case Bolton gets a word of this, I think it would be better to go after them and make sure nothing goes wrong, but I... Could you go?"

"DiNozzo..."

"I mean, I'll come too of course. It's just that... I need some fresh air and it's not that far from here and I really..."

"Alright then," Gibbs agreed, but only because he could see the way Tony's eyes never left his wrecked car and the pained look in his eyes. Taking out his backup gun, Gibbs gave it to Tony, who barely even noticed when he was made to hold it. "Be careful and don't stay too long or I'll send the FBI after you." Gibbs was actually trying to joke, but Tony being too far gone in his own mind, and memories, didn't even notice it.

Gibbs watched for a while when Tony got out of the car and how he then with slow and heavy steps walked toward his car. Gibbs wondered if an old friend of his would be able to fix it up for the kid, but even he knew it would not be a simple job... He finally left, knowing that this was one of those moments when a man needed to be left alone.


	26. Smile Like The Sun

"You owe me one, Jethro. I'm sure you realize that I just closed one of the worst cases I've ever had and was really looking forward to getting some sleep."

Yes, Gibbs did know it, but it had been the easiest and fastest way, calling Tobias Fornell, rather than the man's boss or someone else.

They were sitting in the Baltimore PD and by then it was basically morning. Tobias and few of his agents had arrived a little while ago and now those agents were in their car with strangely quiet Langer, waiting for their boss to join them so that they could leave. Tobias however was not in a rush since his eyes had spotted a certain young Detective who sat behind his desk, staring at the cup of coffee in his hand.

"That your boy?" Tobias asked and Gibbs stared at him.

"Even you, Tobias?"

"Well, I have heard some rumors, which I could believe only when I see it myself. I came, I saw and now I'm a believer."

Gibbs rolled his eyes. He was sitting where he could keep an eye on DiNozzo. The young man had barely spoken few words after finally coming inside, which was only a few minutes before the FBI, but long enough to get coffee he hadn't even touched yet.

"So what's the situation?"

"Situation?"

"The kid. You don't go around making friends. Your expertise is making enemies, not bond with anyone. You're really going to pick him up and bring back home with you?" Gibbs stared and Tobias smirked. "Abby called me. I could be wrong, but I have a feeling that girl of yours has been talking to anyone you are close enough to talk with every once in a while. I'm pretty sure she's setting a trap for you, Jethro."

"A trap?"

"Oh, don't try that on me. You know she's doing this in order to put the idea in everyone's heads. Trust me, you will take the kid home with you."

Gibbs didn't say anything, but there was a faint smile on his lips, which he quickly hid behind his own coffee cup, but from Gibbs that was more than enough for Tobias.

"I'll talk to you later. Just don't scare him off like you do everyone else, Jethro. The kid must be good to get your attention and even Abby's approval." He gave a pat on his old friend's and drinking companion's shoulder and left.

Since he no longer had an audience watching his every move, Gibbs stood up and took a seat next to Tony's. "Belt knife?"

Tony shrugged without looking up. "It was a gift from one of my former partners before he retired—not in Baltimore—and he made me promise to always wear it or just have any knife with me all the time. At first I thought it was stupid, but then it kind of saved my life, so now I am wearing it all the time."

Gibbs was humming in approval. "That's good. Never go anywhere without a knife. Rule 9."

Tony snorted. "You and your rules. You ever forget or get tired of them?"

"You were disowned?" Gibbs asked instead of answering, although he hesitated before asking the question. The dark look crossing Tony's face was enough of an answer.

"We're not talking about that."

"How old were you?"

"Gibbs..."

Gibbs opened his mouth again, but saw the pleading and even hurt look, which reminder him once again of the boy he had almost killed, and he closed his mouth.

Drinking his now cold drink, Tony chuckled when he could see the next question about to come out of the man's mouth. "We both know you don't need nor want to ask all those random questions. At least not right now. So you might just as well get to the point. What is it?"

Gibbs frowned with a thoughtful look on his face. Was it really that easy for the man to read his mind? At least that's what it was starting to seem like more and more. Perhaps Abby and everyone else were right. He could already imagine them working together and DiNozzo annoying him to no end, testing his patience, yet never disappointing when it came to doing the work. Even if he would have to try teach him to not treat his own life with such a nonchalant manner. Oh yes, he was going to age ten years in a very short amount of time with this one around...

Tony, who had been staring at Gibbs the whole time and waiting for the answer, saw the man smile for the first time. Okay, perhaps he had noticed it before, kind of, but he had thought it was just his imagination. So it was the first time he truly saw it. He had to admit that the smile softened the old man's features so much that one could be fooled enough to think he was a nice guy.

The smile was still there when Gibbs finally asked the question, "So... How good are you writing letters, DiNozzo?"

Tony was startled. "Um... Pretty good I think... Why?"

At this point Gibbs was starting to feel nervous, which was ridiculous. "Good. Then it shouldn't take too long for you to write a resignation letter."

"Gibbs?"

"If you're fast enough, I'll give you a ride to D.C. I mean, your car did get totaled pretty bad, right?"

Tony had a feeling he knew where this was going, but he wanted to make sure. "Right... But, Gibbs. I really am not sure what you are trying to tell me. So help me out a little?"

Was he really going to make him say it? Of course he was. "DiNozzo... I'm offering you a job. So are you going to write that letter or not?" He'd never before chosen anyone to work with. They were always given to him, whether he liked it or not. Never before had he wanted to work with a partner. He was a lone wolf. To finally want all those things and now the kid was just staring at him silently.

When the hopefully former Detective finally spoke, it sounded almost surprised and uncertain. Like he wasn't sure if this was a good idea. "Yes..."

Gibbs smiled softly. For some reason the answer made him happiest he had felt in a very long time. Before he remembered that hugging was out of question, he had already moved toward Tony. At the last moment, instead of a hug, he raised his hand gently against the back of the young man's head and squeezed softly. Both men were surprised at Tony's reaction when he leaned against the touch. The moment didn't last long, but it felt like it.

"I... Uh... I'll just... write it now, right?" Tony stammered and he dropped the pen several times, when he took it out with the paper. He frowned when he remembered something else and he looked at Gibbs with unsure eyes. The man still hadn't moved his hand. Gibbs was both amused and sad how the kid didn't seem to know what to do with himself in such situation. "Should I do something about Bolton also? I mean, it's not like he actually held a gun at me."

Gibbs just stared and let the raised eyebrow do the talking. Tony got the message, as Gibbs knew he would.

"Right... I'll call the big boss tomorrow and I'll... I'm sure Frost will be mad at me for letting things go this far, but It's the right thing to do and..."

"Hey. You need help with something, just ask. If you don't want to do this, then don't."

"Right. Thanks, Gibbs. I'll do it."

"Good boy."

Tony rolled his eyes, but didn't stop the smile that finally broke free. His true smile. And if Gibbs would say he wasn't surprised and pleased to see it, he'd be lying. Seeing it light up the whole room made the Agent realize something; if it were up to him, he would much rather only see this happy and carefree smile on that face.

"Alright. You write the letter and I'll go wake up the Director. He's going to want to know he's getting a new Agent."

"Gibbs. Wait." Tony looked nervous when Gibbs stopped at the door. "Are you sure about this? I mean, I can be a real—"

"Haven't been this sure about anything since Kelly was born."

Gibbs walked outside, leaving Tony stare at the door. Suddenly writing that letter was both terrifying and easier than almost anything else he had done in his life. And by the time he was ready to leave the letter, he felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Part of him was still not sure if going to NCIS of all places was really such a good idea, but now that his car was gone... Perhaps when working at the NCIS, he could feel just a little bit closer to Howard. "What do you think, Howie? Am I doing the right thing?"

With a sigh, Tony walked outside. Seeing Gibbs standing outside his car and waiting for him, Tony touched the back of his head with a small smile. "I promise to do my best, brother. I'll make you proud."

"Ready?" Gibbs asked when he saw the former Detective.

Glancing at the car, Tony hesitated for a moment and swallowed. Well. If he had survived the car chase of all things, with Gibbs of all people driving the car, he would survive it again. "Yeah. I'm ready."

_**The End** _


End file.
